Thank you Patti. I'd just like to meet Mrs. Victor one day and tell her how lucky we think she is, her hubby being in prison and all....
Water Cooler - 4
Too funny, shall we send cookies? patti
No, a cake with a file baked in!
Patti, you've already discovered the solution to flings - if everyone out there who's thinking about fooling around would just become gardeners, they'd be too busy and too tired to even think about it!
PrimroseSue, Perhaps a flower-less chocolate cake with DG famous PlantFiles tucked inside for some easy reference for Standard Dwarf Bearded Iris 'Escape Artist'.
I think that those who would stray would do so no matter how tired they were actually. It is a sad and useless mental game for most that does not usually have a happy ending. Things get very weedy in most affairs.
I'll stick to the real ones. I can't believe I have been pulling some this week. Hey weeds it is January, knock it off. Patti
Weeds in January? Ugh.
If we can picture the 50 to 66% of those who cheat with the 66% of obese Americans it does create a comical picture. Talk about "a roll in the hay"! They'd both be looking for the roll.
Thanks all - didn't mean for the discussion to go that way! Funny Pirl! Lots of marital breakups seem to be simple incompatibility. I think people get married too quickly.
Some people just grow apart and don't share the same interests and values any longer. What seemed ideal at 25 isn't working at 35.
You are so right Pirl! My brother (a minister) and his wife were married for 38 years. When they announced they were getting a divorce 5 years ago I was floored. I could not imagine what had come up NOW that hadn't come up in 38 years and would cause them to split. It was simply they had grown apart and no longer shared the same interest. They are still close, e-mail each other every week, talk on the phone and share 3 beautiful girls. They just don't read the same books, like the same people, one loves to hike the other hates it. Both got tired of doing things alone and wanted someone to share these things with but not cheat on their spouse, so they split. Found out they were both happier and found other people with the same interest. Eventually agreed that their life together was over and divorced. They had to explain this to me just as they did to their daughters. I was 2 when my brother married her...she will forever be my sister-in-law and a part of my life. I took it as hard as the girls, they were like 2nd parents to me.
Long ago we were friends with a guy who started a business with one truck and built up the business into a huge success. His wife was there at the start and as the money rolled in she could finally go to the ballet and opera, a lifelong dream. The man had no interest in either subject. He was content to remain as he had always been and didn't want any part of the lovely restaurants, vacations, etc. It's a shame but the marriage ended.
That tells me that they could/should have divorced long before but just did not. I think 'growing apart' is much more likely for people who marry young.
I'm sure I got married too quickly, but I wanted a stable home for my son so much, I neglected to look closer.
That's one minority that's good to be a part of, Victor! DH and I are both 19 years into a very happy second marriage, and that apparently defies the statistics on successful second marriages also. It's a big mistake to see the problems before marriage but to think they'll go away or you can fix them!! I, for one, was WAY TOO YOUNG! It was just what everyone did who was finishing college with me. You took your finals, looked around and picked out your husband and then had a lovely, traditional wedding, followed by a baby shower in your honor within the next year. Oh, MY!!! LOL (Not quite like that....I was engaged for awhile during college, but the rest is pretty accurate!)
After a bad #1 and and a dangerously awful #2, I was planning never to get married again ever ever ever! #3 WANTED to get married. I might even have proposed, or at least suggested or hinted the other two times. #3 (Mister Right) had to talk me into it. I let myself be talked. We'd still be together, wedding or no wedding, but I think it helps HIS family figure out how to think about me. x, C
I think it's a good thing that people are getting married later now. We'll see if that changes the stats down the line at all.
...Guess I've been lucky, one marriage, 30 years this summer. ☺
Congrats! Seems like 30 for me. Hee hee.
Why is that funny? If you don't like it, you don't have to stay married. If you choose to stay married, to be married, to each other, you can chose to enjoy it or at least make the best of it? One of my ex-husbands used to joke all the time about it "felt" like we had been married forever .... next thing he knew he was on his knees in tears begging me to take him back. It was a lot more complicated than that - he did a lot worse than just make bad jokes. It was not a decision I made lightly or casually. I did it for my children's safety and my own safety.
Sorry, Victor - I think I overreacted! I still am not sure why it's funny. My DH and I are sad that we have so few years left to spend together. x, C
It's called a JOKE Carrie.
Anyone got plans for the long weekend? I'm going to do my winter sowing, among other at-home things.
Congrats, WaterCan! I wish you another 30 as well! That's lovely!
Cogratulations WaterCan!
Donnie, I'm right behind you in that succesful second marriage.
By the way, Victor (&I) are not in the "bottom" third of men, we are in he top third
Good point, Dave!
Thanks guys, it's a little premature (August) but I do appreciate all the well wishes! ☺
Here is a spin - Thats Hunky Dorie
The other night my DH said hunky dorie. I said - what's those words and he said. It's good, it's great.
What do you get out of those words?
Hunky - Slang a person from EC Europe or of Hungarian or Slavic extraction: a vulgar term of hostility and contempt
Dorie -A flat-bottomed rowboat with high, flaring sides, used chiefly in commercial fishing
I got lucky - found out the guys were no good before getting married - saves alot of money on legal fees. I don't know about anyone else that has never been in a long term live-in relationship [married or not], but I am awfully comfy with my space. I think I'd have a hard time sharing it at this point. Food I buy is there until I eat it. No one's laundry to do but my own. I have constant control of the both the remote and the recliner. I don't have to be quiet regardless of the hour.
More and more I see happy women, like you Anita, perfectly content without a constant man in their lives. Hurray to Anita!
It's total insecurity that keeps many women locked into marriages, not the "love" they claim.
I am married. I am an independent.
Laundry - I do my own, he does his.
Remote - he can't touch it even when I am sleeping. He tries to pick it up and I wake up and grab it out of his hand.
Recliner - we have 2.
Quiet - I let loose when I so desire if he is home or not.
Food we both eat it and the dogs also.
Each their own as - you gotta do what cha wanna do.
Sure, anyway you choose is good. But it's choosing for good reason that counts. You know: I need you because I love you; not I love you because I need you.
Hi Anita! Good for you.
Schicken, good system. Do you both really eat the food and the dogs? ;^)
Pirl, a constant man is hard to find! They are usually good to keep around. ;^)
Dave - reminds me of the song, "Walking 'round in women's underwear".
Is that Victor's??
I don't think I know that song. Was it a hit?
Pirl, Reminds me of one too, Millie Jackson …when you go to the Laundromat,
you don’t have to wash nobody’s funky draw’s but your own… Patti
Dave: Somehow I seriously doubt it.
Patti: I missed that one!
This message was edited Jan 19, 2008 9:42 AM
I don't mind sharing, Dave.
Laundry, I do mine & Iron ( and darn too). She does hers but I always offer and vice/ versa.
Independence - she has a carrer, so do I. We've spent a lifetime building it and couldnt have done it without each others help and support.
Cooking, I cook... I insist, I like it!
TV, we dont watch it anymore, It's just not worth the waste of time for us. We read or go on the computer, actually the computer has taken the place of TV! ☺
Gotta go... on my way to the City. ☺
Wow, what is it with laundry?? I do everyone's, including the cat's.
DH does his, I do mine. Taught my son when he was nine.
If you split everyone's into their own piles, and then further into the darks, brights, whites, etc., I would think that you're either doing a lot of extra wash and wasting lots of energy, or you're waiting a long time for the individual piles to be big enough to fill one load!