CREATE A MEMORIAL PAGE TO DG'ERS WHO HAVE PASSED

I think Dave has mentioned quite a few times that while he and Trish find their own strength in Christianity, the site itself is not Christian specifically. Correct me if I'm wrong, Dave.

And as for the prayer forum, well....prayer exists in virtually every religion around the world. If some ignore the forum, it's probably because they just are not interested in responding to prayer requests. :-) Similarly, the quote at the beginning of the newsletter mentions God, but doesn't contain any particularly vital info so is readily overlooked by those who choose.

Notifications of DG-ers passing away, on the other hand, is something I do consider vital info (literally), and I would hope that I wouldn't have to be subjected to someone else's religious beliefs in order to find out what's going on. I thought that "Heaven" was relatively generic but as Laura pointed out, perhaps it's not. Once again, the only thing all of us really have in common is gardening, and it's there where we blend the best as a group. There should be no assumptions on any other aspect of our lives, IMO.

There are lots of lovely phrases that have been suggested so far, and I trust our administrators' judgement.

Shannon

I agree that "Gone Gardening" is kind of vague, like the member's just on sabbatical or something. I think "Memorial Forum" is solid and recognizeable without being biased toward any belief system.

That's right, Shannon.

A good analogy is the restaurant Chik Filet. They are quite open about their faith (so much so that they aren't even open on sun-day) but YOU don't have to share their faith in order to eat there.

In fact, it's not even openly advertised at Chik Filet. Any member of any faith can happily and peacefully eat a sandwich there.

DG is the same deal. The owners, just like everyone else in the world, do indeed have some kind of faith. But that's doesn't really affect the people who eat at Dave's.

Dave

I want to shy away from any forum name that might sound religious at all, including the "Heaven's Gate", etc. If we named it that, then how are we going to handle the member "PaganSister" when she dies? It's kind of a funny joke, but you get my drift.

dave

I'm so glad you feel that way, Dave. What it comes down to, by my way of thinking at least, is do we want everyone to feel equally valued and welcome here or not? Clearly you do, and it's one of the many, many things that I love about DG. Thanks again! I look forward to this forum/page/icon we've been discussing, whenever it's able to be established.

Cheers,
Shannon

I agree "gone gardening" may be a little too vague. I'd personally prefer something like "In Memory" or "In Memoriam" (short enough to fit under their username, and I think it's pretty universal in meaning.)

Dave, I had a thought.

What about a box like you do for the new subscribers and the poll booth. My thought was a list of recent losses (or no names at all in the box, perhaps an icon if a new name is added) with a link to look up other losses, maybe even clicking on the icon will bring you to a page where the names are then listed in the order received or alphabetical order. Perhaps decorate it with a picture of a bouquet of flowers?

I read the poll booth and new subscribers every time I log on. Is that something that I could manage from my end, if I were to moderate this?

I agree that we should probably not use a religious name for the title, but I do think that In Loving Memory is good because we truly are a loving community, which is why a lot of us stay here :)

Kathy

What about using the common name for Myosotis sylvatica, Forget-Me-Not ?

That's neat, too, Dea! The nice thing is, each forum has a little blurb explaining what it is, anyway...So people will see what the forum's purpose is.

Gone from earth...Forever in our hearts
or just Forever in our hearts

i like these
Forever in our hearts

Forget-Me-Not

I like the idea, but I want to comment on a few of the titles suggested.
We have to think about new subscribers... if they log in and see a post of Terry's they'll see Admin under her name, pretty explanatory... then they'll see Uber.... maybe they read the opening page and understand it, or maybe they'll just think it's some type of "rank" (for lack of a better term)

If you add something like "Forget me Not" or "Forever in our Hearts" that is not necessarily going to register like "In Memoriam" would. As Terry said, that is pretty universal, and won't be confused with anything else.

Forget me not might just mean in a garden site that the person posts a lot, so no one can forget them. :-) Or Maybe a favorite flower...

While I like "In Loving Memory" I've personally always thought of that as something reserved for the family to use, yes, many consider this a family here, but when I die, DG's "In Loving Memory" doesn't mean the same thing as my children's "In Loving Memory".

I love the "Gone Gardening" but the first thing I thought of when I read it would be that they were just away from the computer.....that could be something that pops up on an inactive user name after a certain amount of time. ;-) (I say that in jest, I'm not suggesting that you do that Dave)

Just my two and a half cents worth, A Memorial forum would be nice as a place to express our sympathies and grief but on a more practical level it would be nice to be able to click on a person's name and read their information there. That way , new members and old alike, can find out about this person whose posts made them curious.

Perhaps a short obituary then on their home page? This could be created by a DG member or sumbitted by a family member to the moderator and then be posted so it remains simple and tastefully done. Combined with a small icon such as GW suggested that was placed by their posts while living this would honor the deceased and inform us of their loss.

How about: "They Gardened Among Us..." Seems fairly innocuous.

That's nice, Dea... I just want a separate forum, not a thread or a note under a name that I may miss...

Thank you, Darius.

I think simple and straight to the point, a forum entitled "In Memoriam" or "In Loving Memory". It tells it all, without anybody having to second guess and does not offend anyone with religion or whatever.

And I agree to an obituary, perhaps copied from a newspaper....and if we know how this person passed, we should post that as well (using absolute discretion, of course), because members will want to know who, when, where, why and pay our respects.

The moderator will have to take this information and then post what is deemed necessary and in good taste. (I also think that in some cases it may require some research by the moderator to make sure that what is posted is correct information.)

:) Kathy

This message was edited Mar 25, 2005 6:21 PM

I like In Memoriam, for all the reasons Melissa suggested....and also, somehow the fact that it's in Latin appeals to me, particularly for our multi-national crowd! :-)

It would be nice if there were a place for any of us who wants to, to post our particular memories of that person - after review by the Admin staff. It would be good if their member page remained visible indefinitely. And if this kind of information's available, I would want to know when the person joined DG, when they passed away - perhaps someone could contact the next of kin to see if they want to say anything - or at least send them the information that's posted - they might be really gratified to know how their loved one was regarded by his/her gardening friends. Just bumping up some ideas again for discussion - I think they've been mentioned before in this thread.

Shannon

I may have missed a thing or two in reading here, but I think there needs to be something under the name of the person who is gone, in the threads. What happens if a newer member pulls up a thread and speaks to the deceased person?

At hallsons itS at the bottom of the forums and all it says is:

FAREWELL

maybe
FAREWELL FRIENDS

This message was edited Mar 25, 2005 7:30 PM

Very good point, Brugie.

What would be wrong with putting under the persons name "Deceased" (and the year).

Right, that would be ideal. We talked above about having something similar to the "Admin" and "über" designations like you see below those folks' names, just something brief which would link to the memorial forum.

Sorry.

This message was edited Mar 25, 2005 7:28 PM

There's an echo in here! LOL ;)

Is it me....I don't have time to read all the posts. Sorry.

I was just laughing because we posted the same thing so close in time. I know I start posting something, get distracted by something else, and by the time I submit my post, someone else has already said what I did.

LOL! No problem.

There is something I have seen in caskets more than once and I also wonder if it might be apropriate. It simply says "Gone Home" or "Going Home". There are so many nice suggestions. I like many of them...In memorium, In loving memory. I'd like "In His Hands" anything that suggests they were loved and have gone to a better place.

My vote is for In Memoriam (and possibly the year) under a person's name - it would be discreet, respectful, subtle and would not be inclusive of only one faith. Not planning to die soon, but if I do, this is what I'd most welcome under my name. A separate (linked) forum (paid subscribers only) would also be a nice way that people could share their favourite memories of deceased participants.

I am overwhelmed at all the support for a memorial forum/page I have seen here!!
And..... the ideas ain't bad either!

Okay, we're going to do this exactly the way we talked about:

1) We will create a forum (I'll choose from the great names suggested here).

2) I need 3 moderators to step up. I think they already have: who are they?

3) I'll also make a badge for members who are deceased, so that it'll be seen in the forums, etc.

Dave

Thanks, Dave.

Hi Dave, I'll be glad to be a moderator. Just let me know what you want/need. Kathy :)

I would be glad to help in any way that I can... I am not sure what all a moderator does, but I do have time to help. Please let me know if I may be of assistance.

The moderators will have the following tasks:

When they learn that a member has died, they will do two things:

1) Add that member's username to a special area of the site (only accessible by the moderators).

2) Start a thread in the deceased forum, with a standard subject line, giving the information pertaining to the death.

That's it.

dave

You're awesome Dave

It is a wonderful thing to do for our subscribers. I would be pleased to help if I am needed to do so.

So that is fsr333 and MistyMeadows. Any others?

Dave, JoanJ posted way up above that she's a volunteer.

I would also be happy to assist should you need another person.