Best/Worse/What did I learn today? Chat with friends

Debbie - I couldn't agree with you more - slow, steady and quiet voice helps best. I've been through the Tough Love program, and I learned first of all that it's Not My Fault. - they haven't grown up yet, and secondly - that screaming just brings you down to their level and you can't be the best friend or enemy - you can just be their mentor/parent.
They are doing this because they feel "safe" to do it and need to grow up in order to realize that being "safe" doesn't mean they get to practice acting badly by trying it out on you. They will........ but they need to learn it isn't Right.

I agree with Mary too - Lance needs to step up and not "throw it all" on you......

Such wise women on this thread!!

As most of you know years after Roger I married an ALMOST perfect man..life was wonderful until step daughter (spoilt as can be) moved next door to us..as years went on the step grandchildren took their cue from their mom..a dog wouldn't be treated as badly. Bill should have stepped up to the plate but, his daughter said the children didn't want to come visit (because I had rules)..I insisted that I would treat all the grandchildren the same, and did, but demanded respect...was also told a zillion times I was not their grandmother and their grandmother told them they did not have to listen to me...well we all know how that ended..end result..had Bill been man enough to say there are rules, there must be respect then things would have been different..as it is, his grandchildren are a handful and in trouble a lot of the time..

Lord, I'm thankful I am where I am, life is good!
If the grandkids misbehave or speak badly to their parents I just don't put up with it..several times and I've mentioned it here, they are asked to leave, even once before Thanksgiving dinner was served, hurts like h((l but they get the drift.

Dear Friends,

May I ask you once again for prayers..this has not been a good week so far.

I was going to Mae's tonight after work to visit with Mae and Darlene, Ann was coming with me..just got a call, Darlene asked someone to call me to say Mae had taken a fall and so she is with her Mom in Midland Hospital. I do not know how mad so if you've a moment, a prayer please!

OH Betty.....What a sad sad situation. Poor Darlene has her hands and heart full. Sending thoughts and prayers for everyone.

Betty, don't over do it....you need to rest too.

Just shaking...Mae is not well at all..her feet are black, they've talked a few times having surgery and possible amputation..her eyesight is all but gone..being unkind but ... won't type what I'm thinking!!

Oh my positive thoughts and prayers on their way. A special hug for Darlene as I know she so needs them right now. Reliving Mike's death alone through her dad's death just has to be totally gut wrenching for her Betty I am so glad you are there to support Darlene as I know she needs as much support as she will possibly allow herself to have at this time.
Dianne

thanks Dianne,

she just called me
she was at her moms and her mom started downstairs or so she thought but completely walked straight and fell down..she was in a lot of pain.

Darlene said they are just getting ready to take various tests, gave her something to calm her down, have her 'strapped' well, not sure what that means. Darlene said Mae is trying to tell her she's ok now but Darlene said the tests will actually show what is wrong. If something is broken then it's another trip to Barrie Hospital or NewMarket.

Darlene said that is the end of thinking Mae can stay on her own.

She will call me as soon as results are back and she knows what will happen.

Betty, so sorry to read of the latest problems. Sending hugs....gentle......and prayers. They say the Lord doesn't give us more than we can bear but there are times........................

Poor dear. Good thoughts to Darlene for the strength she will need in the coming days. Being strapped means that they have used some form of restraint on Mae for her safety. I certainly hope they are able to stabilize Mae and give Darlene some answers. I too fear that this may all be too much for Mae.

Betty by strapped they probably means they have her in a back and neck brace so she can't get up and do more injury.

Likely, I'm not thinking!!!

Sending lots of thoughts and prayers for them Betty! Keep us posted please?

My prayers are with all of you Betty - I'm praying for strength and peace for all of you. May God hold you all close and keep in His care....

Betty - Darlene is truly blessed to have you to turn to, but it's got to be terribly difficult for you both............. my prayers are with you.
Is Mae Darlene's mom?

Yes she is..
I just got home, waiting for a call..muscles at bottom of neck are so painful..painkiller needed!

Susan, what did our doctor say!

Barb and all, did tell Darlene your prayers are with her and she does appreciate them.

Dr. said it's NOT heart-related. Says I likely pulled a muscle (in my scalp? I can see in either my chest, leg, or jaw, but all 4 places affected? And why would I wake up in the am with pressure on my chest? This is why he's going to have me see a cardiologist. I'll get a phone call either from my Dr's office, or the cardiologist's as to date/time.

Susan, you have been dealing with so much lately between home repairs, job, church and so much else....I wouldn't be surprised if it isn't stress and anxiety related.
And YES waking up with it is possible also. I have had that, and it almost feels like a weight/pressure on your chest and your heart is racing a bit.
Do you know any relaxation techniques? I put on a favorite...quieter music....or even a movie (happy one)....and just do slow breathing. Make sure hands are not bent...but out on your lap, comfortable. And no legs crossed feet on the floor....and just breath in....and blow out slowly to the count of 10. It really does help.

NOTE...make sure you ignore the phone and everything

This weekend Bob & I are going in the Motor Home and enjoying a camping weekend. We'll return Sunday eve, and get ready for Thanksgiving dinner on Monday. I fully intend to enjoy my first weekend in the MH. We haven 't used it yet, so this will be fun and educational!!
Because we're not having to pack much, or unpack/set up either, it will be more relaxing than usual (when we were tenting).

prayers and hugs Betty...for you and Darlene.

only thing I finished is the sunflower, did get a bit more done on witch, and have plans rolling in my head for the wooden sign.I could not find the pieces of wood I thought I had??? may have to take a look see at Joanne, or Michaels....

wow Thunder - what an array! Love it all, and the sunflower looks great!!

Evening all, forgive me if a short post.

Just got in, Darlene called to ask if I could pick her up at the hospital, she had gone in ambulance with her mom..did so, then went over to her mom's to lock the doors, make sure everything was off then we went to her house for a bit. She is totally exhausted.

Mae fractured her hip, needs an operation, Midland does not have surgeons so call is out, not sure if Barrie, Collingwood or Newmarket, surely they will find. A surgeon by morning.

Thanks for the update Betty, sorry to hear she needs surgery. Will Darlene move her in with her after she comes home?

Susan, make sure you keep after the Dr, and get that appt.

Thunder, love that sunflower wall hanging, you did a great job!

Hello To All;

Love you all... my sisters.. you comfort me !
Jean yes Lance is like Betty's Bill.... He won't change nor will he stand up for me... but you are right... he should... I just have to adjust to knowing that.
Debbie shame on me... I yelled... and I should not have... You are right I need to hold myself to a standard... will try to remember that....
Oh Katie you are spot on. Their mother was hooked on crack and may still be. After her last visit with her, Roxanne (DSD1) told me "Mom is hooked on crack". that was within this last year... maybe back around Spring break? April? They have not been back to see her. I never say a negative thing about her mom... I just said... that I can't respond to that. Their Bio mom was in rehab when DH served her divorce papers when the girls were 1 and 3..... we met later that year and dated then broke up then dated again and married when the girls were 8 and 9.

LK Thank you for the orange Rolls....they are comfort food to me. BETTY I am so sorry for Darlene, Mae is her mom? ((HUGS)) to you and her and family

WOW what a day. Sorry for the "ME" Post but today yet another Veteran salesperson resigned. I started at my job 3 years ago... the new person in a 12 person sales team (with 25 years experience). Now I am the #4 veteran THAT many people have resigned! Then I learned that the second to newest hire has resigned as well, they just have not officially told us yet because of the veteran resigning....
Only 3 other people have been there longer than I have ! Hopefully a message to corporate but probably not.

I plan to ask for more accounts day after tomorrow. Susan .... I hope the relaxing camping weekend will help you feel better...
Debbie - hope that Shane is showing some improvement... maybe sometimes they need outside influence... "we" are / were always wrong... LOL....

HUGS
Mary

Mary, didn't mean that you shouldn't yell....we all do and I do. BUT I have noticed when I am "beyond" ready to loose control.....I take a deep breath and then I say in a low voice....what I want them to HEAR. They actually shut up and listen, instead of tuning out my yelling. Does that make sense? They won't listen to me "rant" but will...when they know I have reached the limit and they had better pay attention. AND I always remind them of their choices....they have the choice to make the right....or the wrong decision. AND because they think they are adult....they will be responsible for the outcome/consequences of that decision.

I am over tired, spent....and babbling. Sorry! But sending LOTS of hugs

Debbie

Hey Debbie;

You are absolutely right... That's what threw me... when I started yelling DSD totally ignored me and I do understand that...

DH took her back today...Thank goodness.

I had a good afternoon... DS came home from community college and I asked him to throw the ball for Belle.... she is still a puppy and needs to be worked out or she is insatiable.....

I won't hear more "accounts" until the cardiologist gets back to me, and I don't know who that is. It could take a week or two before I hear. In the meantime, I'm relaxing.

Debbie - I agree about the low tones. My kids always said "when Mom gets quiet when she talks, that's when she's scary........." lol They knew I meant business then, and they'd pushed me to the limit.

Morning everyone! 65 degrees this morning, and so nice! But is supposed to be 99 today and tomorrow, and Friday is supposed to be 102! Our summer is not quite done yet!

Morning, light drizzle this morning

LindaKay, not summer like weather in my neighborhood so enjoy the last of it in your neck of the woods..calling for low temps and rain for our Thanksgiving..means I won't feel badly playing in the house unless I'm called upon for help!

Cooler temps for us also and lovin' every minute of it. Oh my, it had slipped my mind that this Monday was Canadian Thanksgiving......sure wish I was with my niece and her family in London but.........

Errands call today so have a wonderful day everyone.

Here is the extended forecast for Michigan... Looks like I need to pack some warm clothes! Sunday is 32 degrees!!!!!


Today 68° | 54°, Thursday 77° | 46°, Friday 57° | 39°,Saturday 55° | 34°, Sunday 54° | 32°

Now look at the forecast for Texas!

Today 99° | 64°, Thursday 102° | 66°, Friday 99° | 66°, Saturday 95° | 54°, Sunday 88° | 57°!

Why am I going to Michigan???? LOL!

Just wwrote a long message then acccidently sent it into cyberspace.

Our really nice weather is starting. Nights are cool enough to sleep well and days maybe go to mid-80's. Skies are clear and blue.

Dogs are happy and playful.

A good day for each of us to be sure to take care of ourselves. Then we are better able to help others.

hugs, katie

LindaKay, weather will actually be wonderful for your visit..as long as I don't have a blizzard to meet up with you I'm 'A-ok' As far as I know I'm booking off at noon next Friday so I can get to Frankenmuth at a half decent time..

Marion, wish you were at your niece's as well..

Katie,you sound chipper this morning..nice to see!

Waiting for a call from Darlene

This message was edited Oct 3, 2012 10:06 AM

lol LK- yes, it's going to be cool for you in Michigan, to be sure!! Dress warmly!!

Betty - be sure to tell Darlene for us that we're praying for her and have her and her family in our hearts.

Started a beef and barley soup in the largest crockopot we own. I can't seem to remember to use the smaller one - good thing I have a freezer.This blade roast has been in the freezer for so long I took pity on it.I really miss making vegetable jam this time of year and especially will miss it this winter.

Wood is starting to stack up nicely - it is amazing how much you can get done going 'slow and steady' rather than 'mad dogging' it like we always used to do.

Sending comforting prayers to Darlene and her family. When is the funeral Betty? How is your headache Betty?

Is it a long weekend for those of you in the US too? I seem to remember our cottagers from NY State coming up this weekend to close up as it was a long weekend. Maybe they just made it one!

Sending comforting and positive prayers to Norm and Barb as they go through all of their doc's visits this morning. Waiting to hear the outcome almost with bated breath.

LK I forgot to comment on your DS' engagement. Congratulations all ways round. I was so happy to read you really like your soon to be DIL as that means so much. My first MIL was one in a million and the hardest thing I had to do when I left her son was say goodbye to her.

Today I am officially declaring war on the laundry room. Wish me luck! I know I cleaned that up shortly after Warren died but it sure doesn't look like it now. Why would 1 need 3 coffeepots albeit with different sized carafes when I already have a working coffeepot on the kitchen counter? I finally managed to cajole someone into taking the second bread machine now if I can do the same with the second deep fryer I would be happy.

My trip to Charleston with 3 other DG ladies was a wonderful break for me. By the end of the week I was so homesick for my house, the fields, the serenity and my critters.Having been here I think Debbie would understand what I am saying. Not a life meant for everyone but certainly is for me. Quill did much better this time but I think having Diesel along helped her. I guess Diesel llit a firecracker under Steve's and Pam's dogs too.lol I would have loved to have seen that.

Judy, how is Jake's leg? Don't cancel that doc's appointment.

Have a blast in your mobile home trip Susan!

Dianne

Dianne, am glad you ventured out with DG friends, always nice to be home but am sure you've great memories. Soup sounds delicious, should get my slow cooker out and slow cooker recipe book..when working it makes life easier to get supper going before you leave for the day.

Not so sure USA have a holiday this weelend..am glad we have Thanksgiving in October vs late November, just too much with Christmas only weeks away.

Bet Diesel doesn't leave your side now..

Is the wood piled under deck or under cover so you can easily access this winter?

Darlene called about an hour ago, said likely they would send her mom here to Barrie, asked if I'd be able to pick her up at night from Barrie hospital, drive her home, pick her up in the a.m.and drive her to hospital, of course she need not have asked, I'm ready to do anything she needs done. Just got an email..elder sister who is a takeover type of person, who already advised them the day of Art's death that she had a buyer for the place on the lake..went on to say how the property should/would be disposed of..all this in front of Mae is on her way to hospital so Darlene said who knows what will happen once she gets involved. think our having family of choice (friends) is sometimes better.

Yes, we have a 3 day weekend, it is Columbus Day! And where is MAe supposed to go, if her house is sold? Pretty sad some think that way!
Dianne, sounds like your doing good, and going to be busy sorting out the laundry room! Sounds like you need to have a yard sale?

Mae won't be able to go home now that she has fallen and unwell, guess she will stay with Darlene until things are sorted out. Mae's home is multi level, not good when your eyesight is almost gone, bad legs and going through difficult times.

Darlene just called, no Barrie, trying for another location..now that is b a d !

She was crying but had a chuckle, apparently the nurse who was in emerge when her dad was brought in he said 'my name is Arthur Murray but I won't be able to teach you to dance today!' for those of you young ones, Arthur Murray dance studio was a big thing..

Hello everyone!!
Just a fast note before I finish packing the rest for our trip.

Betty...sending prayers for Darlene and her Family...what a tradegy. Big hugs for you my Friend...I know this is hurting you as well. Hope you have a wonderful Thankgiving Weekend. Take also time for yourself and just relax and just breathe.

Barb...I am with you and Norm this morning and holding you close to my heart, I sure hope you will get good advice and news from the Doctor. Sending prayers and hugs!!

Debby...LOVE the picture of MY bunny...OMG he is soooo adorable. Wish I could take you and Mary with me, so you both could get a break from your "young adults".

Dianne...hope you are feeling better and that you have no more spells. You are always in my thoughts and prayers.

Susan...have fun camping!!! Relax and hope fully you will feel better soon too.

Sorry to cut this msg short, but have to swing my hooves....lol

Love and many hugs to everyone and you all stay healthy and happy while I am gone.
I will have very limited internet, so not sure if I could post...
Cu you on the 18th!!!
Love and hugs
Thea

LOL at the Arthur Murray line!!!!

Hit of panic in my chest when you said DArlene said NO BARRIE!!!! Oh no .... does that mean TO? Not that they don't have enough on their plates right now. Amping up those positive thoughts and prayers fo DArlene and her family. Her poor mam , losing her beloved DH, falling and injuring herself, a DD who wants to sell her house right out from underneath here and now NO destination for surgery. That poor woman!!! Huge hugs for Darlene ,she is going to need all of the help we and her firends can give her.

LK I think I will donate the items to a local village organization that collects such items. They often have Silent Auctions, sell the applicance to an eligible person for 25 cents.. AS I have been slowly going through things I am finding treasures that I never knew Santa Warren had let alone squirreleed away. Makes me smile when I do find one of these unknowns though.

Dianne