Surprise visits good or bad?

Oh...can't go 5 years without Taco Bell......nope will not happen.

LOL. And I could do without Taco Bell for the rest of my life without a tear.

Well,

I wouldn't cry either if I didn't have it, but I am not going to avoid going to make a point.

i haven't been to any fast food places in years and years until last week. i stopped and got a fish sandwich. it doesn't mean i don't like them; i just know how bad they are for me. lol

I get sick every time I go to TB, that is why I won't go. There is
just something about it that makes me feel ill every time.

Ah, but Macaroni Grill, MMMM!

On the subject of surprise visitors, which I receive at times and though my house may not be as clean as I would like most are welcome. Many of my friends don't knock and if I'm not home come in for a drink, bathroom break, use the phone, leave me a message or just wait and see if I show up etc. Places like this do exist in the US, unfortunately they are few and far between.

Reading this thread made me think of a series of events here two weeks ago. A woman I grew up with (good friend of my mom's) lost her fairly young husband quite suddenly to a heart attack. When she couldn't get ahold of him (she was out of town) she called neighbors to check on him. Long story short, he was in the house for over 4 days after passing.

Without being gruesome, the house was not pleasant. By the time she returned home (less than 6 hours later) the community had cleaned her house, mowed her lawn, watered her plants, cleaned out her fridge, taken out the garbage, removed the rug in the bedroom where he had passed, scrubbed the floorboards, brought in fans and basically the house was filled with food, notes, flowers etc. when she returned. Dozens of people were in and out of that house that morning and not one of the people helping was genetically related to her. Just friends and neighbors.

I definitely think it has a lot to do with town size. As towns get bigger people know each other less and less and have less invested in the town and each other. In most towns and certainly in most cities if that had happened the coroner would have locked the house upon leaving and the widow would come home to that. Neighbors wouldn't have keys or feel comfortable entering.

I won't go on, but this type of generosity is not uncommon here.

Tombaak - You are very blessed to live there.

Wow, what a testimony to the good hearts of her friends and neighbors.

MySharona, I actually live in another town not far from there, but would have liked to move there, just couldn't find the right house.

Unfortunately true communities are few and far between.

tombaak,
What a story that is! Indeed, such harmonious comminities are in existence. You are right when you compare the size of the town to this: smaller the better relationship and better understanding, bigger, they become naturally 'isolated', due to practical day to day problems. Trust gets lesser and lesser.

There are always people here to help any family out in any case of emergencies. It is common to request a neighbour to take care of the house if they lock and leave for a holiday.

We earlier had visitors always. My great grandfather though he was a very strict officer, respected by all, and feared for his discipline, was renown for his magnamity. In his time, one lady or other (relative) would be sent in for confinement in the very room where I'm now sending this post! Their families remember that even today. That was 80 years before. It has continued till my father's time. That was just an example. On a daily basis, visitors would feel free to drop in, and even stay for many days. There was one old lady that used to visit us like that. We children used to have a fun time teasing her! She did not enjoy, but we did. Suddenly, one day she would say I'll leave tomorrow and off she went. Even local aquaintances drop in if they feel like coming. They all know that our door is open. It's going on even now, though the old lady is no more, and the confinements are taken care of by their respective families - nuclear family system [:(]

Dinu, when you speak of confinements are you talking of the ill or ladies who are pregnant?

well everyone, just dropped in for a sec...so very pleased that you also live in communities such as mine!!!!

I have thought that confinements are referred to pregnant ladies and I meant that. I have not known of the word's broader application.

The term confinement can indeed mean the period of pregnancy when a lady was limited in her capacity to travel or do heavy work and the first day or days after the birth when she needed assistance. But it can also refer to the restriction of movement for any purpose from illness to punative. I just was not sure which meaning you were utilizing. So many words have multiple uses that it sometimes requires extra explanations for me to be certain I am understanding their intent.

Thanks for bringing it up, Zany. It helped me learn a new thing.

Coming back to my post to tombaak's post, there is another family opposite my mom's house. There too, relatives, friends, guests.. are almost constantly present. The family's business is to serve lunch - they run a small hotel in a part of the house. It is their family profession. They were well off when they were under contract for many years, but when they came down here after it expired, they are not the same. Their families have grown, but still, they somehow manage with the visitors. Food/snack/coffee is always available to them - just like magic. Making ends meet is a challenge to them. In spite of that, this goes on. That is a joint family system. They are so hospitable and they are such a good support to my mom and available for help any minute.

I think some of the most generous people are those who just make ends meet. People who struggle know the value of kindness better than those who are more financially fortunate and are more than willing to pitch in when needed because they themselves have benefited from the kindness of others.

Personally I believe in Karma...

100% true. I'm with you, tombaak. I have seen many families like that. Yes, Karma has its role for sure. We get to realize this as we grow older, get to see things around us.

Especially after reading this thread, I have really tried to embrace the "surprise" visitor. My parents' home was always open to visitors, and every Thanksgiving/Christmas or other holiday, we invited a G.I. who was away from home to share a family meal. Once we even hosted a "brother" in the Catholic church, who was becoming a priest. He got my room and I had to share the bunk-bed in my brother's room, for maybe a week. I remember he played the guitar and sang folk songs. It broadened our horizons to meet people from other faiths and cultures, and it surprised me to learn, when I was older, that not all families did that. The little girl I mentioned before, she shared Christmas Eve with us, because her mother went to jail for drunk driving. My father was visiting from Canada, and we just made room. I guess it would be nice to get notice before people just show up, but that is not always possible. I am learning to be more gracious. Thanks AngelSong for opening my eyes and heart...