Slump Down In Your Chair & Tell Me All About It.....

Have you ever thought about receiving professional help? I tried to make an appointment for PA, Plant Addiction, but I never even got the opportunity to speak with a counselor. The appointment clerk asked, “are you a member of an online gardening website”. I truthfully answered, “yes, but only one, Dave’s”. Then she asked the average number of new plants I added per week, either by rooting, seed germination or purchasing. Doing my best to calculate quickly, I asked, if one of the dogs breaks off a limb and I stick it in dirt, does it counted? She promptly replied, "according to our new Plant Addiction Profile Software, you can't be helped" and the phone went silent.

With this new profile software in place, we have no choice but to try to “help” each other, so slump down in your chair, relax all parts of your body except your fingers and tell me all about it

……. maybe we can work a Trade!!!

I am so glad you spoke up. I have been needing Plants anonymus for years.
I have to have every plant and atleat one of every color. I have atleast graduated to trying to only get ones that will live in my zone.
I have more trees in my yard that my DH can even get the mower (push) between. His problem after all he married me. Right?
I want one of every brug color there is and 2 if I can get them. Coleus...Oh my! atleast...the very least 2 of everyone.
Now you went and got me started please any epiphyllum cutting I can beg for. I don't steal but boy I can say pretty please till my eyes pop out.
Plumerias, Bromiliads, Iris, Daylily, Amaryllis, Cannas, Odd plants. Help! I could go on forever. Is this an illness? No It is not...........Am I in denial? Am I really sick? Is this what they call obsessive compulsive?
I spend hours on here trying to find a trade. Some who has something and wants something of mine. Oh yo live for that next trade....That next package to come. But I have to admit I love all parts, trading, buying, coming home, seeing everything bloom but darn can't someone else weed and plant. After all it is so exhausting just doing the rest of it.
Don't even get me started about the coops....There I said it. Not enough money to get everything. Maybe, just maybe, DH won't notice if we have potatoe soup every night this week.
Do you think he would really notice if I put liquid tide in his shampoo bottle? Baking soda makes for really good toothpaste I heard.

Sick no I'm not sick. So what did you say you had to trade?

And did I mention the seeds sprouting in the carpet and on the furniture from all the dirt I drag in? I'll save that for another trade. ;o)


This message was edited May 9, 2005 10:02 AM

You need an upper! We all got it attending Iowa Round-up. You don't feel bad about planting lots of plants, in fact you may start using a flashlight or moonlight to keep up.
So find a RU near you & attend, it is the best!
Bernie

I can stop anytime I want.

Don

lol lol lol .............

There is no cure. There is the possibility of some self limiting by stopping your mail, eliminating the phone and the internet services, but that only gives the addicted the additional time and opportunity to cruise garden centers and neighbors for more greenery.

If there are two addicted parties in a household, the addiction becomes more intense as both are enablers, which resulted in our cramming four trees, fives gallon size shrubs, a rose bush and two trays of starters in a Honda hatchback yesterday. Many times the addicted are afflicted by other garden diseases, such as the dreaded Weedblindness, which presents itself after thoroughly weeding a specific area, and then turning around and seeing dozens of weeds that were not there when you were pulling others. It's also common to find Storagedeficiency syndrome, when multiple plant containers, garden tools, fertilizers, nozzles, gloves, take over the garage forcing you to park vehicles on the driveway.

Multiple addictions are known to cause people to garden in their pajamas, continue gardening with the help of artificial light at night, and frequently cause Indoor Maintenance Neglect.

I fear there is not much hope for the addicted as the affliction is poorly understood by those who have no gardening experience. Perhaps the best way to manage this condition is simply to ignore the ignorant who shake their heads in dismay, or purse their lips in disapproval as they do minimum work on their manicured lawns. Be brave. It won't kill you.

ROTFLOL ................

Gardening in you pj's is just fine - it's when you forget to change and head out to the car for work and realize you are STILL not dressed. Ahhh - but all the plants got watered and chatted up first thing in the am! And that's what REALLY matters.

And have room for 22 tomato plants - why did I start 48 seedlings?

I have room for 20 peppers - why did I start 32??

And what's up with soaking 54 Morning Glory Seeds???

And then there's the neighbor...I think it's cute that you're so into gardening! C-U-T-E???

This message was edited May 9, 2005 12:24 PM

BTW - I am NOT obsessive compulsive...

lol lol lol Don't tell me how you did that, cause I'll do it..


Is the keyboard really a good substitute for a grow pad?

Looks like it stayed warm enough...or was that you burning up the keys!!???

Handy place for an herb garden - you never know when you might get the munchies!

Now I never thought it could get that far out of hand!
Do you transplant with one hand & type with the other ?
I think there is a teaching somewhere that we are supposed to replenish the earth. This plant thing falls right in line with that teaching, so you can use that as an excuse. LOL!
Bernie

I have really lost my mind, it started raining real hard with thunder and lightening all around and what do I do... charged out into the yard to rescue my Brug Cuttings. Oh Dear, Oh Dear

Sounds perfectly normal to me!

Bernie, I believe you are right!

So we're starting a list of the reasons we need professional help

1) So the neighbors won't think we're crazy....

Wait, that could work to our advantage..
Oops Advantage=money=plant buying power...
Idea: We could write a book on how to keep your neighbors AWAY.
Is there a demand for such a book, maybe not
Note: Change title To - How To Keep Your In-Laws Away

I love to trade, I love to trade, I love to trade. In fact, have you ever bartered and bartered until you finally get the trade? Then you discover that,

A) You already have the iten, or

B) You get the trade and wonder what you were thinking? "I don't even like this!"

ROTFLOL

I try real hard to avoid the stronger "drugs" of this addiction and I'm so relieved when the plants are no longer available for trade, temptation no longer tugging at me.

I will admit, when I've seen you were the one who won the prize, I giggle in delight knowing, when you come to your senses you would realize you didn't have a use for it either.

Hi, I'm Jen and i'm a compulsive plantaholic..

I can remember just last month i went to the florala plant swap with minimal trades, and ALL intentions of only getting what i traded for. Now mind you, i have a big 'ol SUV with with down seats. By the time the swap was over, poor Brandon was forced to sit on the smaller of the seats for the ride home. On top of that we hit 3 nurseries AND wally world...insane!!!
Then there was the time that i "had" to get things done in the morning so i impatiently waited for the coffee to finish. Grabbed it running out the door and spent the next few hours working in the yard.....only to realize that not only was i in "just" a big t-shirt, but that that was all i had on. (eeeekkk). Kinda realized TOO late what the trucks were honking at, lol.
Hurricanes coming?? Who cares about the windows and flying objects, as long as the brugs are protected and the smaller pots wedged somewhere. Sure my insurance company loves me.
Yes, I'm sick, but so are my friends and we all seem to get along just fine : )
Jen

This is good for me. Maybe there is hope.

1) I've never been caught outside with just a t-shirt or night gown on because I had my mind on my plants, instead get dressed.

2) With me the plants are 2nd place, right after the critters

3) I wasn't caught out in the yard the other day in the middle of my flower bed stripping my clothes off because I felt something "big" crawling up my leg.

4) It's a very positive thing that I live way out in the country, up in the woods without any neighbors, to 'catch me'.

We stopped at a great Garden Center on way home from RU. There are lots of addicts. People were putting plants in cars & forgeting to leave room for the passengers. Many had someone packing while they shopped, only to soon realize what their car could really hold. Luckily I didn't see any people straped to fenders!
The only thing stoppinp me from filling up, was a full car & 4 big full greenhouses at home.
I did plant some of the mass of plants obtained at the RU.
Bernie

"people straped to fenders"

Hey, Bernie that has the makings of a good invention, 'fender seats'. Invention=money=plants

I do love these "confession time" threads. :)

This one girl I know, yeah that's it, a FRIEND of mine, not me mind you, came home from work the other day and saw my... I mean HER... gorgeous Lady in Red hydrangea sitting by the pond still not planted. Then I, er, she, noticed the shovel still sitting out. Naturally, she started digging the planting hole still dressed in a somewhat short skirt and high heeled, open toed shoes! Not to mention it had been raining so there was lots and lots of mud. Well, that gets real slippery on the shovel so she (I'm gettin' good at the correct pronoun reference now) slipped off it and almost fell in the pond! I'm talking doing that back arching sway type move you do when you are trying not to fall over backwards. After that, she decided to AT LEAST put on decent shoes, which to her means flip-flops! So she sat down her purse and keys while the poor husband said, "what are you doing?" She said "nothing, I'm just an idiot." So he KNEW it had SOMETHING to do with outside so he went out in the yard and spotted the plant next to a shovel and half dug hole. To which he replied, "yep, you're an idiot." Ha!

Okay, okay. It was me. I give! :) But heck, we have a detached garage so I have to walk all the way through the backyard to get to the back door. Can ya blame me for taking detours? The worst part is I try and do it quietly if my husband is home because I don't want him to hear me and come out there. Because then he drags me in and makes me at least bring in my purse and put on some shoes!

My other problem? I am like a kid with ADHD that some accidentally gave some speed to instead of Ritalin. I go 100 miles an hour and don't fully complete a single task. I have 400 projects- BIG projects mind you- going on at once and can't seem to focus long enough to get them done. So here is me- ok, I am focusing man. I need to finish digging out that bed. I already have plants in pots waiting for their new home. Oh yeah! I will go water those before they dry out. Then on the way to get the watering can I see leaves all over my new sod. Gotta rake those. But oh no! Dog poop! Need to scoop that up first. Hmmm... those dogs DO need a bath, let me do that. Finally get the watering can and water the potted plants, then start to dig out the bed. But wait! This shovel sucks. I need my other one. So it's back to the garage. Oh man! I forgot about that flat of seedlings. Let me plant those real quick. Start to plant but wait! Too many weeds in this bed, let me weed it first. The next thing I know I have been outside for 5 hours and not removed ONE BLADE of grass from where I was supposed to be digging it out. And on and on and on!

But let me pat myself on the back... this weekend I DID get my drip irrigation system about halfway installed. I also DID get that bed dug out. All 103 square feet of it. And planted the stuff that needed to be planted. I am making myself finish that drip system before I go guns blazing on that pond. But low and behold I have a big container with THREE water plants sitting there waiting for the darn pond to be renovated. WHAT IS WRONG WITH US???? :) I have planted 6 hosta and 2 hydrangea around my pond. Who, I ask you, starts the landscaping of a pond that still needs to be drained, patched and sealed? Who? ME! Because on top of that ADHD thing, I am also a compulsive plant purchaser.

There, that feels better! Whew!

Jamie

Girl, you just havent gardened until you've done it in just a t shirt, lol......couldnt never expect me to live in the city (giggle).
jamie, confessions are good, but rest assured you are not alone, lol

Sequee, Gosh that is planting and recycleing at the same time. You need to put a patent on that invention.

I must admit, I "borrowed" the photo. It came over on the Internet. My boss spotted the image on my screen and just said, "No, Janice!!! Back away - form - the - keyboard!" Keep in mind that in the corner of the office, I have a south facing 2 foot by 8 foot window, and an east facing 2 foot by 8 foot window. In this space I have a med cart which is currently housing: 16 tomato plants, 4 clitoria vines, 4 pride of Barbados, 6 bleeding hearts, 6 kiss-me-over-the-garden-gate, 8 Jerusalem Cherry, 4 spider plants, 6 pumpkin plants, and misc. other projects in the making - ain't life grand???

PS - I would also like to point out that I was only mildly afflicted when I joined DG. Thanks to Judy and JRush, I'm was a complete goner in mere months.

Uh oh, Jamie has 'but first' disease. lol

Thanks Angie! Now at least I know my ailment has a name! Like now, I reeeeaaaaalllly need to get ready for work, "but first" I need to check DG.

Jen- we need to find you a t-shirt that says "Garden Naked!" Hey- that could be the new shirt you wear to do your gardening in "just a shirt." Ha! Let me tell ya, we live literally 5 miles from downtown Dallas. So not "in the country" by any means. I have not gone out in just a t-shirt, but I have gone out in a tank top and shorts with a big rip (not hole, RIP) up the back. Of course I got into what I was doing and stayed out a while. Then my husband pulls up- let me back up and say our fence is a 4 ft wrought iron fence and we live on a corner lot so you can see right into my yard. Anyway, he comes in the yard and says "I'm sure you don't care, but I could see your hot pink panties through that rip in your shorts FROM THE STOP SIGN!" Ha! He was right, I didn't care and still didn't go in for another hour. :)

I did that once. well I need to invest in the hot pink panties to make it interesting. It would be like a stop sign on my size 20 behind. But I did fogot I had a hole in my lime green pants. Oh well in school we use to say it was clean and paid for. Well atleast now they are paid for. After awhile in the yard they are not clean.

It would be different if I looked like barbie.

I LOVE all the funny stufff in his thread!!

I'm told I was out with a flashlight pulling off slugs one night in nearly nothing, clothing-wise. He, he... I don't remember.

Well if you are willing to wear lime green pants I think you could do hot pink undies! I have some cute lime green shoes you could wear with your pants! Not sure the open-toed high heels would interest you, but apparently I have made them acceptable gardening footware. Ha!
Well it just dawned on me that I don't have a single pair of shorts that are decent enough to wear out anywhere. They are all ripped or stained, covered in paint, missing buttons or zippers, etc. or a combination of those. So I told the husband I want to go shopping this week for some decent summer clothes, to which he replied "why bother? They turn into 'play clothes' anyway?" He is so right! And I love how he says "play clothes" like I am a little kid being told I can't wear my school clothes outside to play. Good stuff man! :)

I am so glad to find that this is an epidemic and not a rare disease that only I am afflicted with. Actually, think it is genetic. My mother is famous for asking people, any people -- McDonalds drive through, strangers, anyone -- if she can take a cutting, seed pod, etc. Very embarassing as a child, but you know what they say about growing up and becoming your mother . . . Currently I have purchased or moved, but have no home for:

1 Strawberry Lemonade Buddleia
1 Hydrangea Little Honey
5 Gaura Siskiyou Pink
2 Bagatelle Barberry
3 Hydrangea Endless Summer
2 Spirea limelight
2 Japanese Pieris (Flame???)

Sounds like I need a new bed. Hope child services doesn't come around 'til I get them a new home!

What a wonderful thread..

Thanks to all for the grins and giggles...

And for making me take a look at myself and finding out I am no different than many of the stories I just read.

Gardening is too much fun..and would be wasted on the sane..LOL

Kris

irishbelle, I'll take your 5 Gaura Siskiyou Pink. Just tell me how!

Darius- I don't think she was offering them up, but rather asking for help digging a new bed. Ha!

But that strawberry lemonade buddleia and little honey hydrangea got me drooling! I have Endless Summer too. I can't believe you bought THREE of those expensive things with no place to put them! I also got Lady in Red. LOVE HER! :)

Well, Shoot.

irishbelle - the child services people were just here!!!!!

One woman was wearing nothing be a "suck crawfish heads" t-shirt. Another had on shorts with paint splatters, holes and something pink showing through; I tried not to look. The third woman had on a big floppy lime green hat and matching shorts with a red stop sign painted on the seat. The fourth woman had a laptop and was busy making lists, checking off items and munching on the little plants growing out of her laptop, as they walked around A man was with them but he was intend on adjusting the straps on the "seat fenders" where they were all riding since the 1959 pink Cadillac convertible was full of orphans.

Here they took away all those not firmly rooted and fitted them in with the other orphans giving me looks of disgust, but I could tell they were all giggling as they drove off down the street "fully loaded".

Irish - I have a swell idea! Since I'm right around the corner from you, I'll loan you my yard for your leftovers. LOL! I'll even drive over to get them. BTW, do you know Ellie Muir?

I am planning the new bed for most of these things, but stress coupled with a long winter and a better than average bonus this year lead to a little insanity. Darius, I can probably use three of the Gaura's but will still have two left if interested. Very good large roots, but they got a bit of a hair cut from my nephew helping to dig them out. Most teenagers do not have a lot of patience in the garden. Anyway the new McMansion built next door to me means I am going to have to come up with some creative part shade beds that offer some sort of screen. Hopefully the hydrangea will help. Endless summer is not too expensive here, but the Strawberry Lemonade . . . don't know what I was thinking. And, it isn't necessarily hardy in my zone 5 garden. Will put up pix when (if) done. Of course, if anyone wanted to help dig and amend my heavy rocky clay . . . (LOL)