JMG contest #2 (willowwasp)

Ok- reminded me of some more!

Never argue with an idiot. They just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience!

I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.

If you want to forget your problems, try walking around in a pair of shoes that are too tight.

Ha! Love these guys!

When someone's in trouble He's " up the creek without a paddle"

My grandmother used to say,

"Go, so come back quick"

It basically meant - depending on the context of whatever was happening at the time.

Like cleaning up your room-
**Do it now & you won't have to do it later

Sending someone on an errand to the store-
**Go now, I need the milk for the cake I started to make before I realized I didn't have enough.
LOL!
Nancy

These are so much fun!

My grandma always said "Where was Moses when the lights went out? Down in the cellar eatin' sauerkraut." I don't know what it means, but I always thought it was funny.

I don't think this is very original, but my mom always said, "That will go over like a lead balloon".

I used to tell my kids when they did something I didn't like "I'm gonna skin you!" I didn't think about how awful that sounded. I think my dad used to say it.

Pam

My mom gave me one not too long ago when referring to a tightwad:

"His a*****e is more watertight than a bullfrogs!"

It took me awhile to catch my breath after that one...

This is really a cool thread. I can't think of anything, just wanted to say I am enjoying it all.
When we were stationed in Texas we heard a lot of funny sayings. Like Dr. Phil, they have so many funny ones.

When we were kids my mom used to say: "Your talking out of the back part of your neck" which means we just said something stupid. Also if you asked her where she was going she would say, "There and back to see how far it is".

I know the cutoff for this was supposed to be midnight, but I just wanted to add a couple from my Great Uncle and grandparents:

*He's so tight the eagle screams in agony when he holds a dollar in his hand.

*Stirring poop only makes it stink.
(this has been edited LOL)


*That will go over like a lead zeppelin

Being of the generation that lead zepplin meant Led Zeppelin we thought this was incredibly funny as teenagers.

i know its after dead line but gosh daves was hard to get on to last night and here is some we have all heard

As snug as a bug in a rug

As welcome as a skunk at a lawn party

Already got one paw on the chicken coop

A rose by any other name would smell as sweet

Bats in the belfry

Busier than a one armed paper hanger

Zigged when he should have zagged

Just saw this thread, and I'm still laughing. DH nearly fell out of his chair when I read him the one about the bullfrog. LOL

mini- I had heard that bullfrog one growing up, but in a different context. If you asked someone a question, and the answer was an emphatic yes, you would use it. For example: "Jamie, would you quit your job if you won a billion dollars in the lottery?" My response: "Is a frogs butt water tight?" Another more commonly used phrase is "does a bear poop in the woods?" I also like "does a one legged duck swim in circles?" HA!

When my grandma asked one of us kids to fetch her something (like a glass of water, for instance), she always said "Yer legs are younger than mine."

i still say that to the kids! ;)

Well, cry in a coal bucket!

One of my favorites is Happier than a clam burried in the sand where nobodys diggin for em.

When my kids complain about something not being fair and I dont want to listen to them whine
Stinks to beyou

I always liked "a star on your forehead" wich meant that you had done a good deed for someone and they wanted it to be known. I actualy had an older lady say that to me many years ago, she made my year and all I did was fix her glasses for her.

"Growing old is no more than a bad habit which a busy person has no time to form."

I remember my Grandmother who lived to 96 and worked out in her garden daily until 90 saying this.

put a coark in that whine! ;)

Oooooh Dori! I LOVE that one!!! LOL!!!

"Keeping your eyes peeled"
Took on a whole new meaning during my surgical rotation :-)

heres an old one everyone knows

dont count your chickens before they hatch

Okay we are still having a great time with this thread, i have another one

When your up to your A-- in aligators it's hard to remember that the original thought was to drain the swamp

This thread is too much fun....Rikerbear, you got me with the eyes LOL

Thinkdirt--that one's pretty funny too...I like that one!

My stepfather used to refer to a bad storm coming as a 'frog strangler'. As kids we thought that was kind of funny. It's not funny now when my yard is under 3 in. of water!

Ok folks I finally got back home and I have the winner..............T
There are sooo many, many good ones here and it has been a fun thread and I hope we can still go on and find a few more even after the day is gone............just tooooo funny.... the Bullfrog was among the finalist belive me, my husband just about busted a gut after readin that one..........oh and the stye one too..........LOLOLOL.....she did what?????...........LOLOLOL....he had a good time with it to.....

The way I determined the winner was I read all that was posted up to Midnight last night and told myself the first one I though of this morning was the one that was gonna be the winner........so when I opened my eyes and the coggs all started to churn and I finally remembered the contest the First one I though of was the one I have pegged to use on My Supervisor first good chance I get.....

And it is............thinkdirts........."If you had a brain, it would rattle like a BB in a boxcar".

I have just about laughed myself silly over that one.....
So thinkdirt e-mail me your addy and I will have these out to you in tomorrow mail....I hope you have a beautiful morning yard this season and we will be looking forward to you posting some of the pictures on the forums...


I thank each and everyone of you for sharing your memories and giving us all a laugh.......Thanks so much for all the fun....
Dee

congrats to thinkdirts
this was fun!

Congrats to you thinkdirt! I'm going to have to use the BB one on someone!!

Congrats thinkdirt!

Congrates!
This was a avery fun thread

Guys, I'm gonna be running a JMG contest later today so keep watch in the seed forum :)

Way to Go thinkdirt!!!

Buy you books and send you to school and what did you do?.............eat the crayons.......
any of yall hear that one.......

Dee

thanks to all of you this was so much fun, and I know I will enjoy the seeds.
If I can figure out how to post pic's i will be sure to send some, I am still learning how to do that. I guess there are really BB's in my brain lol.

I just joined DG on the 8th and I can tell you this has been great, so many nice people. i could spend the whole day on this site.

And by the way nice to know there are so many people like to have fun and garening also.

Congrats ThinkDirt!!!!!!!!!!!! That was a cutie for sure!!!!!!!!!

DUH, I just figured out what JMG stands for! Yep that BB is rattling hard today. Congrats ThinkDirt! Thanks for posting a fun thread WillowWhasp and for teaching me what JMG stood for. I saw some photos that you posted on another site, Beautiful!!

thinkdirt- we love fresh meat! ha! I love your comment about spending the day on this site- you will live to see how prophetic that statement is because you WILL spend the majority of your time on this site. Very addictive!

Jamie

Congrats! That IS a good one!

Kauai, go to the Plantfiles at the top of this thread and click on it. When the page loads Type in Morning Glory and then submit. After that page loads sit back and enjoy some of the most beautiful flowers you can think of. Then let us know what you think of JMG and MG's............LOL

Dee

8o)

Wheres Moonlighting and where is that contest she promised??

OMG I am drooling looking at the pictures. The color combos are gorgeous. I have only seen blue morning glories so I was in for a shock. We don't have any but they are going to be added to the list this year!! Thanks for enlightening me.

The contest is up http://davesgarden.com/forums/t/484610/

Congrats to the winner. I'm going to be using that one for a while, for sure. LOL!