Apropos of Nothing v.4

I can't imagine what the police officers must be thinking - adrenaline, grief, shock, trying to communicate and absorb the whole thing while trying to catch this guy.

WOW! Horrific

I have been reading about Dusty's son Aaron on the prayer forum and then switched to this thread. My stomach turned over. So much misery.

Not exactly in a festive mood today, but I got our outside Christmas lights up. Looks nice.

Hugs to you, Pony. I saw headlines when I opened my home page just now, but did not realize it was Washington's Lakewood. I just came to DG and then saw your post to find that out.

Would sure love to hear from Melissa. I think her house is about 7 miles away from this . . .

It was 2 miles from my house, and Melissa is about 3 miles from me, so 5 miles give or take.

Pony - I didn't realize. Keep your doors locked tight. I'm sure you've heard that they are looking for a guy named Maurice Clemmons. Though they won't say that he is a suspect, he sounds like a pretty scary guy.

I've just been watching the procession of vehicles taking the bodies of the officers to the ME's office. Just now a local candle maker dropped by more than 100 candles at the memorial that is growing at the site . . .

I had to go out today and run a few errands- I found myself looking at people and wondering if they were killers. So harsh.

This is such a tragedy. I have several clients on the police force and the first thing I needed to know was that none of them were involved. Thankfully, they were not. But these were worthy police officers. We're all in such shock over it.
I do not feel at all unsafe, however. This happened on the other side of the highway, in a completely different neighborhood from where I live, although it could easily have happened anywhere. This was actually in the Parkland area, just by Mcchord AFB runways.
I talked to some of the officers I know who were gathering together today to grieve. They are all pretty broken up about this, and it's actually a fairly large percentage of the police force who were killed, about 10% I think. It's not that big a force considering the number of people who live in Lakewood.
That's how I spent my afternoon: calling clients who were directly impacted by this event. It's going to be a long time before Lakewood gets over this.

This is indeed a tragedy - so very sad. All of you in the area, be safe. I just returned from the Lake Tahoe area and heard this news. Terrible.

This is a terrible thing to happen. My heart goes out to the families, friends and all the people who knew them. Take care of yourself Pixy, as you are helping people through this. You are such a big-hearted person, I am glad to know someone like you is there for them in their shock and grief.

I mapped it out. Five miles isn't far for a criminal to run. You and Pony stay safe!!

Glad you are able to be there for these people. I can't imagine how they will begin to get through this . . .

Well, he ran all the way to Seattle. I've been checking the news way too frequently. It's past my bedtime in a serious way.

I just made the best turkey soup EVER. Remind me, in happier times, to share the recipe.

My BIL and his girlfriend are having an ugly sweater party on Saturday. I went to Goodwill and picked up two hideous sweaters for Tracy and myself today. His is so bad his eyes bugged out and he totally lost it laughing when I showed it to him. I'll be sure to post a picture after the event.

What a great idea for a party! Am anxiously awaiting pictures.

We have a "hat night" party over the New Year's weekend, but this is a new to us great idea.

Great idea for a party!

Ooh- our crowd would love a crazy hat party. Consider the idea stolen! LOL!

I have been so out of touch with the world this weekend that I just heard about the tragedy in Lakewood yesterday. I just can't wrap my head around such ruthlessness. What is wrong with people these days? I have had enough less than happy thoughts of my own this weekend that I will shift gears into the more positive in self defense.....

Pony, I love the party theme, and am itching to see pics! How fun!!! Hope everyone's holiday was everything that they hoped that it would be!

Pony....when they do the Hat party, they include costumes that go along with, although the hat has to be the focus. The pics have been awesome!

Julie, did they pick up the guy who robbed your grandma's house? Are you doing ok?

Lynn, Haven't gotten the guy yet, but there is a warrant out for his arrest. Hope to have different news soon.

Have kind of curled up into a little self-centered ball over the holiday.... thought it might be easier this year, but still sucks, so have spent time halfway between playing in the mud to make myself feel better and wallowing in self pity. Guess we'll have to wait for next year to be easier.... maybe.....

It gets easier, Julie. Slowly, but surely. I have to admit, really slowly, though. But next year will definitely be easier than this year. I suggest you give yourself some time to wallow, but not too much. Wallowing for too long tends to make it actually harder. My heart really goes out to you. I know how painful this time is for you.

Thinking big hugs in your direction, Julie.

Melissa is smart. Listen to her.

Tree #1 is up and mostly decorated. Got to go buy tree #2 this weekend. I still can't believe it's December already.

It's very bizzare to see callas still in bloom right next to a bush covered with Christmas lights... o.0

Smiling at the "ugly sweater" party. One of my co-workers just had an "ugly sweater" bowling party.

I'm allowing myself until the end of the year to wallow and not accomplish much. Then hopefully someone will give me a kick in the new year.

I think that's perfectly okay, Patricia, given the challenges that you've encountered this year. This season can be a pretty tough one when not all our loved ones are with us.

Hugs to you!

Thanks katie, You are very kind.

Thanks all for the support. You know in your heart that other people have gone through as bad and worse and all say that it gets better over time.... just is hard to convince yourself sometimes. I am not spending too much time wallowing... just sneaks up on me every once in a while, and sometimes is a bit hard to shake (can you tell that last night was one of those times?).

Willow, I was self absorbed enough to forget that you and Mary are both dealing with immediate family losses, and Pony that of a true friend more recent than my own this holiday. And Lynn.... how are you feeling? Hopefully much better! Big hugs to all of you!

Pony, I am jealous of you with two trees! I can't even put mine up this year as we are having the in-laws for a couple of weeks, and my dining room is the only place big enough for a tree.... Hmmmmm..... eat at the table or Christmas tree? It was a hard decision, but I finally decided that it would be a bit "ghetto" to ask my guests to eat on their laps for two weeks. Oh well, can still do lights!

I think just about everybody has loved ones they miss during the holidays. It's just (an admittedly painful) part of life. We carry on, because we have to, and they would want us to.

Julie, I know I'm very lucky to have room for two trees. The one in the front room is just a little 5' fake tree that's left over from when we lived in a small apartment, but it looks pretty when it's all decorated. I'm thrilled beyond reason that I can have an 8' tree in the rec room- even though it takes me and my lame back days to get it decorated. I told Tracy he's lucky our furniture is arranged the way it is, or I'd want a 15' tree to go in the middle of the room where the ceiling is peaked. LOL!

Maybe you could put a tree up outside in front of your place? Decorate it with lights and either tinsel garlands or plastic ornaments?

Rarejem, when I was a child I lived with my aunt and uncle in a tiny cabin. They wanted for me to have a tree but there was barely room for us. So my aunt did a hanging Christmas tree. It was wonderful, just hung it up in the corner over a small table, we decorated it and did not lose any floor space. It ended up as one of our best Christmas memories. I have a picture of it somewhere...cute as heck. I am sure it dried out fast but we really didn't care.

Yes, sometimes they hang them upside down from the ceiling.

Rj, Don't feel bad about feeling bad. That's something I've learned also, how it sneaks up on you at odd times. Just between my brother and sister and me, we have all handled it differently. They are younger than i am so we have had her in our lives at different times. Take care and get a tiny tree to use as a center piece.

This message was edited Dec 1, 2009 6:24 PM

I think the pain of losing someone you love will always be there, it is just over time we insulate it a little more from immediate perception; it would be too much to bear the intensity otherwise. Then there are things that happen or just thoughts that come up that can bring it all right up to the surface, sometimes without warning. I hold all of you who have lost someone in my heart (that is probably everyone here, just some more recently than others), and wish you the time and space that you need.

Regrets, both little and big are the hardest for me. It is the hardest thing to forgive ones self. It can take a huge mental shift to get myself re-focused. Recently, I decided to take some action to move through my grief about not singing with my dad in the year before he died, as it had been a big part of our life during my childhood. I couldn't sing at all without breaking apart emotionally for a while.

So anyway, this Fall I decided to join a little church choir that a friend of mine directs. It is perfect for me because all practices and performances are on Sunday during the day, no weekday evenings required. Then a few weeks ago the sermon was centered around "Tuesdays With Morrie" a book about a man who had ALS, the illness my dad died of. I was pouring out the tears, right there in public and could not make it stop. The next week, on my way to practice it happened again, so I stopped the car and asked my dad to please help me sing again. I didn't want to lose that joy. I found I could do it, and it is good for deep healing.

I still can't sing without thinking of my dad. It makes me cry just to remember singing with him. My voice just won't work. I'll have to try your advice for that, Holly, because I surely do miss it a lot. He had the most beautiful voice.

I can't believe it's time for a tree. Every year this creeps up on me without my noticing it. Last year someone gave me a 'GASP' white tree, the fake kind. I LOVED it! I put a lot of lights on it and covered it with sparkly glass ornaments. Here's a picture. I had forgotten about the tree until I was in the attic looking for something else.

This is the Christmas Cave my kids started doing a few years ago. Last year we did not have it because we actually spent Christmas down in Salem with my daughter.This year she is home with us so the kids will probably build it again. It was in the newspaper last year. Pony, you would like this.

Happy Birthday tomorrow, Holly.

I love your cave, Melissa.

That cave is the best! So fun and imaginative!

Thanks for the birthday wishes, Kathy. To tell you the truth, I had forgotten about it. even though it is the big half century mark. I'm not sure am ready for it. Did you just have a birthday go by too. I think I recall we are the same age, so Happy Birthday to you too.

Thanks. Yes, I turned the big five-oh last Wednesday. With all that's going on with my mom, I'd almost forgotten about mine, too, so I know what you mean. :-)

Hope you get a nice dinner and a foot rub for your big day. You've earned that at the least!!