Is there a tactful way to...

So I have this co-worker office-mate...

I'm the only one in the company who doesn't have her own office. I've had several room-mates, and they have each had their own quirks, but they have departed and gotten their own offices. Anyway...I'm sure I might have quirks that bother her, too, but for the life of me I can't figure what they might be...because I keep to myself, I don't make noise, and I'm conscious of what I'm doing. The one thing that I can come up with is that I b--- & moan a lot about stuff...usually about work...because a lot of what I do comes down the pike from others, and if they do it wrong, then I end up having to fix it....so I realize that I do have this pretty major flaw...it spills over into my personal life, too. I'm just a very critical person by nature. However, most of the time, because we are in the same department, and she understands the nature of the work), she agrees with my rantings.

That having been said, there are several things that are SUPER annoying about this person:

- She eats a lot of hard candy. By this I mean that the SUCKING SOUNDS are enough to drive you batty. The 'smacking' sounds...I think you know what I mean. She filled the candy-dish with these things, and I promptly made them disappear to the lobby dish, only to find that she had a personal stash in her desk.
- She walks like a horse. She's a skinny person, but she STOMPS when she walks. So much so that the guy on the bottom floor has mentioned it to her. Her response: (Laughing, as though it is funny) "Oh, my husband says I do that, too..." (keeps laughing).
- Spiders & bugs...has a fear (that she finds 'funny') of them. If one is around her area, she screams at the top of her lungs, and stands up so fast that her chair wheels across the room. I find this totally irrational, and kiddingly mentioned one of the times (after I yelled "J-C!" because it's an otherwise quiet office and she scared the crap out of me) "is this going to be a regular thing with you?!
- Lots of personal phone calls. But this is office-wide. For some reason, it has become the 'norm' for people to carry around their cell phones clipped to their person, or leave them (ringing incessantly) on their desk. Pardon, but why do people think they need to be in contact with everyone in the world at all times? What ever happened to calling your husband/wife/mother at work only in an emergency? And I don't need to listen to 90 seconds of some annoying ring-tone while you are in a meeting and your VM isn't picking up the call.

Are people just that ignorant that (even when TOLD), they don't realize they are annoying other people? At least I realize I'm annoying, and desperately make some (vain) effort to curb my outbursts.

The last gal that was in here had an annoying habit of tapping her foot...constantly...and on the chair pad, with the chunky shoes that are currently in fashion, it was VERY annoying.

Can't people just be quiet and sit and work?

I have read once that "if you are offered a gum or a mint, take it, and the hint." I think this applies to everything.
So got any suggestions?

This message was edited Aug 24, 2007 1:14 PM

Whew.

I once had a co-worker who was text book passive aggressive. A politely
written letter to our supervisor revealing all of her little quirks resulted in the
boss pulling her to the side to have a conversation with the door shut.
My intention was not to have her fired so much as it was to show her
the office is not a place for antics and childishness.

This was not the type of person who would have responded kindly "I'm
sorry, I didn't realize I was doing that, I'll try to be more (fill in the blank)."
Instead, the first time I politely asked her not to shred my documents and
claim ignorant resulted in an all-out war of the warped mind. This personality
type will 'get you back' in ways you may never notice, but will satisfy their
disorder.

Eg: Turning the air conditioner vent so that it blows directly on
my desk, locking doors early, changing the radio station, taking the
toilet paper out of the bathroom, etc.

When people are pulled aside to point out their inappropriate behavior, they
will often respond in ways that speak volumes.

The girl in my story ended up telling the boss to get rid of me or accept her
resignation.

No contest there.

:-)

Wow, I was beginning to think it was me. LOL

I for one detest the gum snapping,

I'm dealing with 3 supposedly mature women. Well dressed, well groomed loud mouthed boors. The woman in the office next to me has a hearing problem - I think. So every conversation is a yelling or screaming. She's a sales person so she is on the phone a lot. Just about every phone call is so loud that I can't hear the person on my phone.

She screams her good mornings like she hasn't seen someone for weeks. She screams when she gets her mail. 2 hour cell phone calls - personal I'm sure. She thinks she's whispering and I consider it talking.

Big problem is the offices are built kind of funny so noise travels. I have asked nicely, begged, pleaded and cried. The volume goes down for the rest of the day and the next morning it's as if she has no memory.

I've had customers ask if there were monkeys in the office - yes there are. Career builders has an interesting topice - The Work Place http://www.careerbuilder.com/JobSeeker/CareerBytes/Articles.aspx?sc_cmp1=JS%5FCarRes%5FJobSee

I've spoken to my boss and he said he will do something. I asked him for a gun and he said that was for another meeting with someone else. LOL Since he spoke with her it's gotten even louder.

Two of them will just interrupt you in the middle of a conversation - no excuse me. The one sits in her office with the door open with the music to loud. Outside her office are people in cubicles who don't have a door to close.

Pure inconsideration. I think the three of them truly believe the world revolves around them.

Wuvie, I think you hit it right on the head - childishness.

Birdsnblooms, I agree with you on "Can't people just be quiet and sit and work?"

I'm thinking of trying duct tape.

I use to work in the back of the dealership with all guys. Guys gossip, and have their own quirks, but are pretty easy to deal with.
The women in the office, used to come back and complain to me about their office mates.

On esp problem days, I would hear from each one, listen but not comment other than "oh, I am sorry"

Every dealership. Seems these women could not get along. One would sneeze on someone's coffee, smack gum, say catty hurtful things.
One time they even turned all their desks around to be back to back.

The General manager usually is close to the office and has to deal with this. I feel sorry for him.

These problems you are having are keeping you from doing your job. A boss should help you.

Don't you deserve your own office by now?

I would sooo much rather work with men than women when it comes to an office environment. At the coffee shop where I work it's an all-female crew except one guy, but it's so very different. I think that is because we are busy serving customers and *doing* stuff that engages many senses at once, not just grinding out stuff at a desk (did that for 18 years!). The physical quirks and habits are bad enough to deal with in close quarters sometimes, but hearing someone complain day after day is what always grated the most on me when I did my time -- err, worked in offices.