Tuesday evening chat room....

The chat room tonight was totally out of line. It is to be about gardening etc not drug addiction.

What a crock of compost!

I didn't think there was a topic in the chat room. I didn't find anything about drug addiction when I logged in.

Hello Grandmaggie,

The chat room doesn't actually have any certain theme or guidelines about what can be discussed so long as it's not offensive. No one was actually doing drugs, nor did they have an addiction. Someone needed help with a rumor problem.

I'm sorry that was your first view of chat but we were trying to help a friend in need.

Michele

The chat room tends to be whatever is needed at the time... plants are often the topic, food inevitably enters the conversation at some point, we brag about our kids or complain about our obnoxious neighbor, somebody may offer us cheese to go with our whine (see? food again, LOL), and if somebody needs help or advice (whether about dealing with rumors or telling them to go to the hospital now, please, because those symptoms might be a heart attack), well we just switch gears for a bit.

The interesting (and sometimes confusing) thing about the chat room is that there can be half a dozen different conversations going on simultaneously. And new topics are always welcome. If you click on the chat room link because you want to talk about plants and find that everybody is chatting about ice cream sundaes and local water restrictions and their daughter's post-graduation plans... just jump right in and ask if anybody else is having that problem with their hibiscus dropping blooms in the heat, or whatever is on your mind. The chat room is nothing if not flexible!

Maggie, I hope you'll drop in another time... :-)

Well put, Jill...I'm usually talking about Badseeds lovely kids!! Jo

Jill, I agree with you completely, but must admit that Tuesday's was sad/strange/scary. Won't stop me from checking in again, but it is frustrating to hear a cry for help and not be able to do anything. Made any side talk, or other conversations seem shallow and callous. Hope all is okay on that front, and the chat room will be back to normal.

I understand your discomfort, but don't underestimate the importance of just knowing somebody is "there" to hear a cry for help... But I do hope you'll drop in again, and yes, the chat room is normally a light-hearted place.

I'm re-reading Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, and it occurs to me that the chat room is like Rowlings' "Room of Requirements" -- it's purpose is to be whatever people need it to be at the time. Most of the time, it's a place for chatty visiting with gardening friends. :-)

Good analogy and you are right....just listening can be of uber-comfort. I will remember that.

Grandmaggie

I will admit it was some time ago, but ....

The conversation was weird and it was all about wine, turned me off and I haven't been back since except to run through looking for a particular person.

Judy

I amthe guilty party. I needed to talk and have not been in the chat room for atleast 11 months but maybe once. I am sorry if I upset anyone but I am not upset by going to my family when I needed them so much. My son was trying to have me commited for ugly rumors he was spreading to my brothers.

My husband passed away sept 15th. This is the family I can reach out to. I thank God for DG. I was in desperate need to talk to someone and saw chat was open. Some of the ones in there I have known thru thick and thin for a very long time.

I was severely heartbroken as my DS was talling my brothers who live in PA and MD that I was drinking hard liquor everyday and abusing vicodin. It was something that shook me to the core that a son of mine could spread such ugly rumors. I can't imagine why except my house is worth over 100,000 dollars and he would take possesion of everything.

I was feeling suicidal and I am glad I went to my family with this. They helped me thru a tough time. I was not going to post here because I did not want all of DG reading it. But I feel I must tell you that I am glad I went there Tues night. I recieved the love I knew I would and they
helped me thru a tough time. I won't hesitate to do it again unless told I can not. And I hope anyone else who has no one to call in a situation like this would know if they go into chat they will be loved and not judged for how they feel.

I do not drink or abuse vicodin. I do however suffer from major depression and bipolar. There are 5 different bipolars and mine is I cycle in and out of depression rapidly. And missing my Love of my Life of 31 years has been causing my depression to be worse and I have no insurance to see a dr. I am on 3 different meds and have been on some type of meds for 18 years. And on top of this to find out my son is being vicious about me and wants me committed. My DB whom I am at his house in MD waited so he could tell me face to face as he said he did not want to tell me something like that over the phone.

I am glad to know but he is my only child and my DIL and 2 DGD's live in Texas 13 miles from me. I have no other family there.

I am still here today because of tues night chat. If you have a problem I am sorry. But I am so glad they were there.

Dave if you have a problem with me going on chat for support from my family here let me know.
If necessary ban me from DG if I broke a rule. I hope you don't but understand if you do.

Now that my problem is here for all to see and not in just chat I hope you will understand.

To those who may have a problem with chat tues nite would you rather I did not get help from my family here. If so I won't understand but
Iwill accept it. I am sorry for the disappointment I caused that plants were not discussed.

The chat room to me is how we find out about one another and bond with friends and our new family and not just plants. Gosh the problems and fears I have been on there for has made me love this place more. Some of us know each other inside out.

Thank You to who was there tues night. I love you and am doing better because of it.

Blessings,
Sandy ^8^

I wasn't there Sandy, but I'm glad you found friends on there to talk things out with. I'm pretty new in here, but have been following a few of the forums and sincerely hope things level out for you.

Sandy, I saw the chat and was so happy that you reached out and got some solace and solid advice from your DG family. Planting seeds of wisdom to help you out in your time of need that night was more important than any bloom on any plant anywhere. Be well and safe. And please know that you have given a story to a beloved group of Hippeastrum that I have because of your coop. I thank you for their glorious blooms and hope that soon you find joy again in your life with no more weedy patches.

Now that we can do a group d-mail, remember to holler when ever you want through that venue to your core group of DG posters as well as using the chat-room. I rant to a few dear DG people via d-mail when needed and I relish the responses I receive. I read the chat at times, but I have never responded. Too fast for me. Patti

Oh! We can do group Dmail now?? I'll have to look for that info... have a plant swap coming up and wasn't looking forward to copy & paste to send directions to that many folks... Thanks for the heads-up on that, Patti!

I think the group dmail may be disabled--there were some bugs in it and I thought Dave disabled it until he could figure out how to make it work right.

Sorry for the false alarm. I think it would be hugely helpful for Coops and RU's plus general private chatter to a group of DG's. So hopefully it will be brought back when the bugs are fixed by Dave. Patti

Thanks, Patti... I found the thread in the DG forum discussing it... hoping Dave can find a way to make it work!

Was the Tuesday night chat stopped??? I miss it.
Sidney

Hi All,
I am a guilty one to just stop by chat once in a while to ask a question & I always have SEVERAL very helpful people to guide me, I very much appreciate them & the chance to ask a great group of people when I need help locating something here, normally a tab or button I forgot the location of, I guess the point is, I truly appreciate the people that help when chat is in session & I have never stopped in on a conversation that was upsetting to me in any way.


((((((Sandy))))
My heart goes out to you, I am sooo glad you found your family to help you right in chat:) Just remember what comes around goes around & I pray your son knows of this fact of life!

:)Anita

I stumbled across this thread by chance. I don't know if this will be of any value, but:

The human mind is very good at making up stories and then believing them. I would propose that it's very likely your son believes these stories he is spreading. I've seen people completely rewrite events in their minds, and then convince others that it really happened that way.

Very, very tough when it's a family member. But I don't think anyone does evil when judged by their personal beliefs. Don't write him off. But do let everyone know he's way off the mark!

Thanks Anita.

And Thanks Dave for being who you are. This place is my home with all my family.

Blessings,
Sandy ^8^

Really sad it ended up being my brother making up the stories. Sad scenero as my kid has a bad track record and I believed my brother only to find out from my DS and other DB that he was the one lying.
Really ended up bad. But I am doing so much better than that night.
And I am so happy to be. It was a dark place to be. Never want to go back there.

This message was edited Oct 9, 2007 4:57 PM

Just spotted this thread and wanted to say how much I *love, love, love* chat! To me it's the place where we really get to know one another. I used to make it to every chat, but lately I haven't been able to and I miss it so much.

The reason I first decided to join DG was because of chat. It was the night that Critter was talking about that someone went to the hospital because of the symptoms they were having (heart attack symptoms). I was watching all that was going on in chat...I was on a DG trial-membership...first time in chat...when I saw how genuinely caring and concerned each and every person in that chat room was for the ill person. I knew right then and there that I would be a DG member for life. In today's world, especially on the 'net, you just don't find these kinds of things taking place...and if you do happen to find them you better grab hold with both hands because you've struck gold baby!

IMHO, if you don't like what's going on in chat then come back 30 minutes or an hour later, the topic is nearly guaranteed to have changed! I've done that myself and no one was the wiser.

Sandy, my T&P are with you and I hope this all gets cleared up asap. God never gives us more than we can handle, so that makes you the toughest lady I know. Keep your chin up sweety.
Hugs,
Heather

Grandmaggie, I must agree with the others here that the chat at DG ranges over a broad area of subjects. If someone in our community is hurting, others are there to step in and ease that burden. At the other end of the spectrum, chat sessions can get silly at times. Sometimes people want "real-time" information about plants, but often they want to just talk about all kinds of subjects. It's the nature of conversation. If you don't like a subject being addressed, you're free to log out and check it out later to see if the subject is of interest to you. There are no hard and fast rules of topics in DG chat, just that it follow the AUP.

I don't know if it's proper to quote oneself but,

I don't think it's been stopped--I don't usually go into chat, but I know I still see the link for it on the home page on Tuesdays. Maybe there might have been one week where it didn't happen, since I don't go in there I wouldn't have noticed if it was missing once, but it's usually there.

I was in chat yesterday. JO

Evening right? Jo?

Yep, it was open this past Tuesday evening. I'm not sure if the link always goes up at the same time -- maybe it depends on when somebody is available to monitor it? But you should see the "chat is open!" button around 7 or 8 pm EST.

And the chat room will be open tomorrow (Thursday) morning, also.

I've noticed the Chat Room Open sign a couple of times but not often. Just yesterday morning I saw it, and popped in but didn't comment cause I really couldn't figure out what the conversation was all about. I have never visited a chat room before so it was a bit confusing. Are there set days and times the chat room is open, or is it just random and you have to "watch" for it??

Lin, it's Tuesday evenings and Thursday mornings. It does get confusing sometimes, especially when there are lots of people and several different conversations going on simultaneously... but just jump in with a comment or a new topic entirely, and you'll get the hang of it!

Thanks Critter! It must have been last night that I saw it then! I know it was very recently! I didn't know it was okay to jump in with a new topic! Will have to give it a try next time!! Maybe I will catch the chat tomorrow morning!

How've you been? Haven't seen you around the AV forum lately? Or, maybe I've just missed ya!

We've been out of town.. with family, on a beach in NC! It was wonderful! But my laptop died, so I wasn't online much. I'll be trying to get resettled here tomorrow, but I'll probably drop in the chat room once or twice. Hopefully I'll see you there!

There really aren't any rules to the chat room (other than not violating the AUP as Gardenwife mentioned)... if the conversation doesn't interest you, feel free to introduce a new topic! Sometimes there are several topics going on at once, which does keep me on my toes, LOL.

When you enter the chat room...just post a "Hello"...others should acknowledge you when you enter....when you leave...say you are going...or goodnight/...others witll post to you....in between those things...pop in with a question...or statement. Works for me. Jo