IF YOU'RE AS OLD AS I AM - THIS IS A RIOT!

Email true or not its funny.

Don :)

The $2 Bill. Everyone should start carrying them!

I am STILL laughing!!
I think we need to quit saving our $2 bills and bring them out in public.
The younger generation doesn't know they exist.

STORY:
On my way home from work, I stopped at Taco Bell for a quick bite to eat.
In my billfold are a $50 bill and a $2 bill.
I figure that with a $2 bill, I can get something to eat and not have to worry about anyone getting irritated at me for trying to break a $50 bill.

Me:
"Hi, I'd like one seven-layer burrito please, to go "

Server:
"That'll be $1.04. Eat in?"

Me:
"No, it's to go." At this point, I open my billfold and hand him the $2 bill. He looks at it kind of funny.

Server:
"Uh, hang on a sec, I'll be right back."

He goes to talk to his manager, who is still within my earshot.
The following conversation occurs between the two of them:

Server:
"Hey, you ever see a $2 bill?"

Manager:
"No. A what?"

Server:
"A $2 bill. This guy just gave it to me."

Manager:
"Ask for something else. There's no such thing as a $2 bill."

Server:
"Yeah, thought so."

He comes back to me and says, "We don't take these. Do you have anything else?"

Me:
"Just this fifty. You don't take $2 bills? Why?"

Server:
"I don't know."

Me:
"See here where it says legal tender?"

Server:
"Yeah."

Me:
"So, why won't you take it?"

Server:
"Well, hang on a sec."

He goes back to his manager, who has been watching me like I'm a shoplifter, and says to him, "He says I have to take it."

Manager:
"Doesn't he have anything else?"

Server:
"Yeah, a fifty. I'll get it and you can open the safe and get change "

Manager:
"I'm not opening the safe with him in here."

Server:
"What should I do?"

Manager:
"Tell him to come back later when he has real money."

Server:
"I can't tell him that! You tell him."

Manager:
"Just tell him."

Server:
"No way! This is weird. I'm going in back."

The manager approaches me and says, "I'm sorry, but we don't take big bills this time of night."

Me:
"It's only seven o'clock! Well then, here's a two dollar bill."

Manager:
"We don't take those, either."

Me:
"Why not?"

Manager:
"I think you know why."

Me:
"No really, tell me why."

Manager:
"Please leave before I call mall security."

Me:
"Excuse me?"

Manager:
"Please leave before I call mall security."

Me:
"What on earth for?"

Manager:
"Please, sir."

Me:
"Uh, go ahead, call them."

Manager:
"Would you please just leave?"

Me:
"No."

Manager:
"Fine -- have it your way then."

Me:
"Hey, that's Burger King, isn't it?"

At this point, he backs away from me and calls mall security on the phone around the corner. I have two people staring at me from the dining area, and I begin laughing out loud, just for effect. A few minutes later this 45-year-oldish guy Comes in.

Guard:
"Yeah, Mike, what's up?"

Manager (whispering):
"This guy is trying to give me some (pause) funny money."

Guard:
"No kidding! What?"

Manager:
"Get this .. A two dollar bill."

Guard (incredulous): "Why would a guy fake a two dollar bill?"

Manager:
"I don't know. He's kinda weird. He says the only other thing he has is a fifty."

Guard:
"Oh, so the fifty's fake!"

Manager:
"No, the two dollar bill is."

Guard:
"Why would he fake a two dollar bill?"

Manager:
"I don't know! Can you talk to him, and get him out of here?"

Guard:
"Yeah."

Security Guard walks over to me and......

Guard:
"Mike here tells me you have some fake bills you're trying to use."

Me:
"Uh, no."

Guard:
"Lemme see 'em."

Me:
"Why?"

Guard:
"Do you want me to get the cops in here?"

At this point I am ready to say, "Sure, please!" but I want to eat, so I say "I'm just trying to buy a burrito and pay for it with this two dollar bill.

I put the bill up near his face, and he flinches like I'm taking a swing at him. He takes the bill, turns it over a few times in his hands, and says, "Hey, Mike, what's wrong with this bill?"

Manager:
"It's fake."

Guard:
"It doesn't look fake to me."

Manager:
"But it's a two dollar bill."

Guard:
"Yeah?"

Manager:
"Well, there's no such thing, is there?"

The security guard and I both look at him like he's an idiot, and it dawns on the guy that he has no clue.

So, it turns out that my burrito was free, and he threw in a small drink and some of those cinnamon thingies, too.

Made me want to get a whole stack of two dollar bills just to see what happens when I try to buy stuff. If I got the right group of people, I could probably end up in jail. You get free food there, too.


Just think...those two will be voting soon.........................................

That was great! Can you imagine the fun a person can have! ROFLOL

Your two dollar bills may be worth more than $2, particularly if they are silver certificates. Check them out. I grew up in a coal mining area. Back then it was very rare to find a $2 bill without the corners torn off. Why? The miners believed they were bad luck. (P.S. I read recently where the govt. is going to start reissuing $2 bills.)

That's just crazy funny. My goodness, what would happen if you came in w/an 8 track?

LOL here! When I worked retail I loved getting $2 bills. I would trade them out of the till with my money cuz I collect them. :o)

great story i have a stash of those too...lol
liz

see, mgh and lizrainy, it's all your fault they don't know there is such a thing as a $2 bill - folks are saving them.

Very funny, thanks for sharing, made me laugh and feel sad at the same time. But mostly laugh, 'cause I'd be the one passing the bill and letting them call law enforcement as well (but hunger rules, of course). lol

why do miners believe corners are bad luck ?

Toooo funny! :-)

Snipe, how old does one have to be to think this is funny?

Well, I've been told I am a young one here at DG and I thought it was funny!

Yep, 4paws, it's my fault.......and I will keep saving them too! LOL

At least your kids will know what they are ...lol

Yep, they already do. They think they are pretty cool.

LOVED this story, thanks for sharing. I'm going to copy it and e-mail to my DH, who once had the state police called on him for trying to pass counterfeit bills...while on a business trip in AL...


Before he left our very small, rural town he purchased gum for his flight at our local convenience store. The change from this purchase included one $10 bill, the only $10 bill he had in his wallet.

When he reached AL he went across the street from his hotel to purchase a phone card at a gas station. There was a phone card machine there that took $10 bills, so of course, he pulled out the one in his wallet and put it into the machine. It kept spitting it out. Frustrated, he went up to the clerk at the counter and asked to exchange it.

The clerk automatically scribbled on it with one of those "counterfeit checker pens." Well, guess what? According to the pen, it was counterfeit! Great, just wonderful. Stuck in AL on a business trip with counterfeit money.

The kid behind the counter tells DH he's going to have to call the cops. DH tells him that he'd better, letting him know that if it really is counterfeit they are going to have to call the FBI in. Sheesh. So, the kid calls the State Police.

It didn't take long for the State Police to get there, but in that time DH had figured out where the $10 bill had come from. The officer came in, looked at the bill, questioned DH, looked at his (out of state) driver's license, etc. DH also informed the officer about calling the FBI. (What's with the FBI thing??? Does he *really* want to meet them that badly?)

The officer and DH inspect the bill. First they decide the phone card machine wouldn't take it because the bill didn't have the metal strip in it. Then they figure out that the pen said it was counterfeit because the bill was from 1952!! It was simply too old for the pen to work on it.

The officer told my DH that he should keep the $10 bill. DH said that was ok, it had caused him enough trouble!

The funny thing is that in our little town, that bill has probably been circulating since '52...and probably would have just kept on going and going and going without a problem for years to come.

The U.S. Secret Service under the Depertment of the Treasury enforces the counterfeit laws in the U.S.
I got a bogus twenty a couple years ago and was not too happy about it when the store that gave it to me acted like I was trying to pass it off on them!
I remember in the early seventies the two dollar bills came with one of the fifty US state's flag postage stamps on them, and I think they were canceled like mail. I probably still have a few in a drawer somewhere.

Laughing so hard stomach hurts, I am not THAT old, am i?

Who can ever be THAT old?
lol

This was great! I actually have a Silver Certificate in my wallet.....I always have had it there. I wonder how old it is? Hmmmm

I would love to pass this story on to my dad....it will just crack him up.