Cheap and cheesy holiday gifts for a party...DO NOT!

Yes, this is a whiner post. I'm crying in my beer, feeling
sorry for myself, fill in the blank. But It's gotta come out.

I tried to keep a good frame of mind.
I tried to think of buying the gifts as payment for the dinner we would eat.
I tried to be merry, think positive and like what we received.

The party invitation specifically said "Bring a $25.00 gift."
These are not intended to be gag gifts. If a couple attends, they
bring two $25.00 gifts.

It did not read "Pull something out of your drawer" nor did it read
"Run to the dollar store and buy something that will end up in a Goodwill
donation bag."

But I can't help it. When that cigarette smoke scented, heavily perfumed
cheap ratty scarf came our way, I had to bite my tongue. I would never do
this, but I confess, I felt like standing up in front of everyone asking where
the price tag was. Where is the receipt, because I think the person who
paid $25.00 for this thing was royally screwed. Please. I know exactly where
this thing came from and how much was paid for it. It came from one of
those teenage earring stores in the mall.

I'm not buying the idea of "It's the thought that counts." Last year I received
a small tin bucket with pretzels and two plastic beer cups bravely featuring a $4.97 price
tag. Golly, all that trouble. And the pretzels expired the year before. Hmm.
Lotta thought there, tucked in the closet from last year's clearance sale.

Another year it was a dollar store perfume with a teddy bear. We couldn't
give this stinking stuff away if we paid someone.

About 1/4 of this party brings such gifts, while the rest of us spend the minimum
at least or slightly above. Hey, I can deal with a cheaper gift, just not pathetically
cheesy. All of the party attendants came last year, and the year prior and so forth,
so this is not a sudden occasion for which they were unprepared.

For pity's sake, toss two bucks into a jar each month and leave it there. Come
December, you can buy a proper gift.

I'm sure I must sound ungrateful, that I should be thankful I have a roof
over my head, blah, blah, blah. These people are not poor. They are not
homeless. They are cheap. And yet they walk out with a fine gift someone
took time to pick while we take the half baked nonsense they tossed into
a sandwich bag. Lack of time is no defense. Again, I mention the next party
is 365 days from now. It's not as if you've not received fair warning.

Next year I'll attend, but I'll not participate in the gift exchange.
For the fifty bucks hubby and I spend each year, we'll keep it and
go to dinner.

Okay, I'm done for now. Thank you for listening. I feel better.

Wuvie -- whose party was it? I'm with you 100%. I'd donate the money to an animal shelter or charity instead and just give the person a card that said "$25 has been donated to XXX in your name."

June

awww...wuv...must be okies??? our work christmas dinner came to a halt, sort of due, to the same kind of thing. all of 'us' peons fixed delightful and healthy portions of.....covered dishes, usually about 30+ show up. the last year we had the dinner, one of the bosses came in, plopped down a hunk of watonga cheese n the a shape of christmas tree...the other brought a...1....can of cream corn. boggles the mind it do.

prew

Oh, I know exactly what you mean. Can't tell you how many times I've done gift exchanges where I shell out some cash to make sure the person receiving my gift doesn't get a dud...only to receive a total dud from whomever is gifting to me. I have come to the conclusion that sometimes you have to focus on "giving" rather than "receiving" and not try to make it balance.

The worst gift I ever got was three used,stretched out bathing suits from the Goodwill. How`s that...I`m going swimming in late December whoohooo!!! :)

You are not alone.

Ha ha! Oh, my gosh, just knowing others go through this makes
me crack up with glee, thank you!

I'd forgotten about the holiday dinners. The folks who bring
the infamous can of something without so much as a dish, good
grief, much less a can opener. "Anybody got a can opener?"
Ugh.

Hubby and I used to put on fabulous get togethers, but the icing
on the cake was that our guests would bring additional guests
who would misbehave, eat our food, trash our house, and leave
without having thanked us or even offered to run for ice. Not a
drop of food in hand.

Or the person who brings (sorry, I gotta say it) a bowl of Jell-O.
Folks, this is a no-no. A loaf of bread is a no-no. And for pity's
sake, spend the extra 38 cents for Pepsi and leave the generic
stuff at home. During our get togethers, a particular family member
would bring a bag of generic chips complaining of finances, then
sit on the porch and proceed to smoke.

June, I LOVE the idea of the "25.00 has been donated" thing. Very good!

Thank you all for sharing and listening.

You guys must be talking about my in-laws !

|I agree, give a card that says, 25.00 has been donated to (fill in the blank) in your name. Saves the trip to the mall to purchase the gifts, the wrap, and the hassle. Or better still, I like your idea, opt out of it altogether.

Or, give them a etiquette book (from the thrift store, of course).

I am going to sound like a grump, here, so if you're not in the mood, skip this post! LOL

I agree. These gift exchanges are more of a head ache than fun. I like the gift card for the charity, too. And I'm going to use that idea myself.

Better yet, how about a holiday dinner party with NO gifts. How about everyone come to the party prepared with some witty jokes, good stories, songs, poems and conversation to share with their friends and co-workers?

(Tell me, what adult needs to spend time and money purchasing more chotchkies for other adults who don't have enough storage space anyway? And don't you think these so-called 'gift' exchanges just feed into the whole concept of 'unbridled materialism' at Christmas time? I am sure of it.)

Not that I'm against all Christmas gifts...I'm just sick of the rampant habit of the 'gift exchange' at every event in December.

And I'm not going to say anything here about the paperboys, yard men, etc., who actuallly put a self addressed envelope in with their Christmas Cards!

So that's my story and I'm sticking to it! LOL

By the way, Have a Merry Christmas!!! t.

Oh, trust me, I agree. We are really not having a Christmas this year.
We'll go to dinner, we'll go shopping and I'll buy things for my kids and
hubby, but I'm not going into debt for a one day deal.

One year I spent WAY too much money on Christmas. I was so proud
of myself. Then I had to pay for it all. I told the kids last year that I was going
to do a little, but nothing like before. The result? They end up getting things
they don't even want just so I could see things under the tree. It is silly to buy
teenagers things they did not ask for, need or want, so we decided cash was
the way to go from now on.

Even stockings cost a small fortune. By the time you fill a stocking for three
teens (well, okay, two have hit 20 now) it's not cheap!

In years past, I've always created a wonderful holiday for the kids. Somehow
they grew out of it in good shape without being greedy and materialistic. So
this year we are going to do things like never before. We're simply not going
to do the normal credit card-stress-overspending-disappointing-depression crap.

The kids' most favorite part of the holidays is the food. The lights. The family
gatherings, the games, the fun. We can do all that, save our money until the
clearance sales and have a good time doing it for a lot cheaper. I let my youngest
deck the halls all he wanted to. Sure, put lights on the house, the roof, the dog.
Have all the fun you want. Enjoy. I'm not going to stress over what they neighbors
will think or if the tree is more decorated on one side. Bah!

Goodbye typical Christmas behavior, hello our own version.

:-)

I'll climb up on the soapbox with you, tabasco.

Christmas is about giving - Not receiving. Take that thought with you to your "gift exchanges", and then you will never be disappointed.

Good thing that the original Christmas gift didn't consider what He was going to get in return from us ... talk about disappointing ....

years ago, a few friends got together (5 or 6 of us)and had a cookie exchange. Really good, fabulous assortment of specialty cookies, home made, truffles, shortbreads, butter tarts..... all holds barred Christmas baking.

Soon we had requests from 'members' to have their 'friend of a friend' included. So we expanded the group. (everyone brought one dozen cookies for each member.....)

That idea went along fairly well.....for a couple of years.

We (the original 5 or 6 of us) quit doing the cookie exchange the year the rice krispie squares and uniced vanilla cupcakes made their appearance.

What amazed me was that the contributors of said squares and cupcakes were the most greedy and they admitted that they came only to get the truffles, shortbreads, butter tarts.......

Yes, they were mad the cookie exchange didn't happen the next year......

Boy, this whole thread makes me glad I live in a small town. We used to throw Christmas parties years ago, but stopped when we had a couple years of poor attendance and lots of leftovers. Now, I bake lots of cookies and make candy, then we exchange with friends. Yesterday, one couple was making the rounds, met my hubby in the driveway, and they exchanged gift bags of yummies. Wish they'd had time to stop and have a toddy, since two other friends had stopped by to do the same.

I mail out over 100 hand designed cards and send out about 10 packages of cookies each year. I get about 20 cards back, and seldom get any goodies in return. What I do get, is thank yous. Sometimes, what I send, either card or sweets, is what makes the holiday a little more enjoyable for the recipient. Some folks actually save my Christmas cards in an album! It's humbling.

I guess we are just not part of the local society, so we don't get invitations to special dinners. We have friends who travel elsewhere for warmer climes, or even 120 miles north to Anchorage for a bit of metropolitan fare. I really don't care if I don't spend the night at a fancy hotel or eat poo poos at some fancy party. Maybe some day... I always say we'll have another party when we paint the floor...maybe someday we'll have another Christmas party. When we do, we'll probably invite the folks that have stuck by us all these years. Just enough of them to fit around our little table and visit. Gifts will be optional, and we'll fix enough food for everybody, so what others bring won't matter.

Sounds like many lovely Christmas customs... would love to stay and chat, but I have to go wrap gifts! LOL

Merry Christmas to All! T.

Oooh, a cookie exchange! How I wish!

The sad thing about such an idea in our area is
not knowing many people. It's like one of those family
reunions, where you ask the people with whom you
are familiar what they cooked so you will know what
to eat and what not to eat, ha ha!

Perhaps next year I'll send cookie recipes in the
holiday cards.

Thank you for the idea!

:-)

LOL...WUVIE..........Attended one of those yesterday..........ahhh who made this??Don't you love it when a person licks their fingers,when their cutting up something to serve you???Needless to say I came home HUNGRY!!!!!!!!

LOL Dems, too funny!

Yep, I know many of 'em. No bleach or any kind of cleaner
in the kitchen, cutting board with chicken used for raw vegetables,
the same wash cloth used for days, dish water that should have
been dumped long ago, I've seen things that would make you never
want to eat again! Ugh!

Bare hands on the food, double dipping in the sauces, it's a scary
thing to eat outside one's home.

We buy these nifty light plastic gloves at Dollar Tree. I think there are
50 to 100 in a back for a single dollar and wow, these things are handy!
I think I'll bring a bag to the next reunion and set out a few gallons of
Germ-X labeled with "Hint. Hint."

Now you all have me in the mood to make cookies!

OK...........Go bake those cookies and DON'T lick those fingers!!!!!!!!!!I'm watching you........I never eat meatballs out either.....lol...had some help making some and could'nt eat any...Now I look at the good points,sure helps to loose weight!!!

That was great Angel!

The gift-giving parties sound scary! I am glad the Christmas parties I've attended didn't have gift exchanges. Wouldn't an easy way to set it up right be to request that the packaged gift MUST have a gift receipt taped to the front in case the receiver already has it or can't use it? OR what about suggesting that no one should take things personally but that if you cannot use your gift (don't say "if you don't LIKE your gift") then please put it on this table here and you may take a different gift from the table when you leave? That one might be a stretch though I think.

How about bring a gift (any value) but you must have a receipt with it's price...then the hostess/host gives you 1 paper ticket per dollar spent. Then you have an "auction" of the gifts but you can only win one gift? I don't know...something like that.....then you are getting more the value you expected.

Merry Christmas! May I jump in?....Went to a party the other night..can you believe the hostess had pneumonia...yep.. coughing and wheezing all over the place, fixing hor'derves, serving drinks and...the host was licking his fingers while he pulled bread for the dip..yep dipping his bread in the dip, licking his fingers,uggghhh! Gross! Talking and laughing, dip all in his mustache! I will not go into further details as it makes my stomach revolt and ache!... Wished I had that box of gloves and Germ-X that night along with a surgical mask!!...I went hungry that night also, no surprise! LOL! ;0)

Oh, Garden6, I'm so sorry!

You likely went home hungry no doubt!

Our party wasn't too bad, we were able to converse about the
house, including the kitchen, where we could see the goodies being
prepared. One finger licking and we all would have said something. Ew!

I think I'll cook more at home in 2007. LOL

Merry Christmas, yeah right! Can I bah humbug just a little here, and get this off my chest? We spent $245 on groceries on my husband's credit card Saturday. He's a bricklayer and is laid off every year around Thanksgiving, for a month or more. So buying groceries on the credit card, esp. this time of year, isn't all that unusual for us. My guess is that half of the money spent was for food specifically for our Christmas feast. We hosted a Christmas Eve dinner, for eight adults, plus my five year old. All close family.

You know how no matter how much you spend, you're always forgetting something at the store? My husband had to dash to the corner grocery right before the party to get more cheese. My sister and her boyfriend stopped him in the driveway on their way in the door and asked him to pick up "their" brand of beer, and they would pay him when he got back. They never paid.

We had a grab bag (my suggestion) and the gifts we got were noticably cheaper than the ones we gave. That wasn't so bad, they're family, and I've been getting crap from them for years, so it's nothing new. The only difference was, since there are three of us (adults), the only people we ended up not buying for was my 19 year old nephew and my cheapskate sister. I feel bad about my nephew, LOL.

We all had a great time, and there were lots of leftovers. Since the menu was Hot Italian Beef and Assorted Hors d'ouvres, we decided to invite my step-daughter and her three kids to eat with us on Christmas Day. Normally, they dash in and exchange gifts in a blur, yeah more crappy gifts for my son (her brother) while her 5, 6 and 8 year olds flaunt their expensive electronic toys that "Santa" brought them. I was going with the flow, it's the thought that counts, right? and things seemed to be going really well, until my step-daughter received a phone call from a friend.

She waited until I was preoccupied doing dishes, which she never offers to help with, then she asks her father if he would mind if she went out for a ride to pick up her friend, who was feeling down. He said sure, bring her over. We still had lots of food. I don't mess around, LOL. Mind you, she never calls me except for Christmas or the kids' birthdays, and we always respond with nice presents. The only other times we hear from her are the endless requests for free babysitting, which we've finally started to say no to more and more. She left her kids with me on Christmas Day, for 2 and a half hours! She finally returned for them at 8 pm, after her father called and told her to pick them up already. I had been up since 5 am, and was dead tired. Turns out, I find out later, that she was drinking with her friend in some bar. I am so disgusted at her inconsiderate, rude behavior.

I've vowed to only buy the children presents next year, not the adults. And no more lavish parties until we're out of debt. Wuvie, I would love to bring a nice hot covered dish and a few dozen home-baked Christmas cookies to your house next year. I would even bring a grab bag gift, only I've sworn them off, LOL.

This message was edited Dec 26, 2006 6:27 PM

This message was edited Dec 26, 2006 6:36 PM

Oh, Prairie, how I wish you could come. I, too, love the
feasts, but hate the hogfests.

You and I could sit around and swap step-daughter horror
stories. Last year mine sucked up a full eight weeks prior to
Christmas, telling me what a wonderful mother I was to her, how
I was a better mother than her own, (which is accomplished while
sleeping, mind you) and so forth.

In the meantime she told me all the horrors she was subjected to
by her supposedly abusive boyfriend. When I mentioned we would be
having a Christmas dinner for just hub and the kids, she called her
father, who gave her permission to invite the supposed abuser. I called
her right back and informed her that I said it would be a small family dinner.

Okay, now she was stuck. Her lies had come full circle. Again. As usual.

She arrived that morning in her pajamas without having combed her hair,
opened her presents, asked what time dinner was, and hit the road. When
my son took the trash out he noticed her boyfriend had been sitting in the
car the entire time. We had no idea. She never said a word about him being
there, and knowing what a drama queen she is, likely lied to him and told him
that I told her he could not come in. I'll bet six inches of hair that's the case.

She never came back. We have not heard from her since last Christmas
day until yesterday morning, when she called her father and spent a whopping
45 seconds IF on the phone with him. Merry Christmas, bye was about the gist of it.

This is nothing new. She's played friends and relatives since the word go. But
this time Daddy took stepmother's side and the feathers hit the fan.

Ho ho ho.



Reason for edit? I forgot 'gist' was spelled with a G, not a J. :-)




This message was edited Dec 27, 2006 7:57 AM

Well, that would be a good trick, but she knows how to play Papa like a fiddle.

Don't get me started. Sounds like your step-daughter is equally charming. We couldn't write better drama.

My husband and I are in agreement about one thing, no more parties until we're out of debt. Except private ones, LOL.

I do plan on having some of the family over Thursday for Matt's B-day. I'm making a couple (different) hors d'ouvres, the ones I didn't have time to make on Sunday, plus cake & ice cream. Just a small soiree.

We're laying low on New Year's Eve, LOL. After it's all over, yeah that's when I'll kick up my heels.

PrarieGirl and Wuvie~ I think after the descriptions above and my silly careless error in spelling hors D'oeuvres, hee hee .... Next year, I'll help you both with the refreshments, of course no licking of my hands nor sauce slobbered all over my face!... I'll throw in some doses of Christmas spirit in a jar to liberally sprinkle those step-daughters with some gratitude for good measure as well! LOL!

Wuvie~ I was absolutely famished and ate raisin bran when we got through the door!

Hope all of you signed up for the 12 days of Christmas cookies from the food network and the 25 days of cookies from Taste of home.
I love all the recipes.

Yum

Lavina

Oh, Lavina, now THAT sounds great!

I searched Google for the Taste of Home cookie thing, but
I could only find ads for Ebay auctions. Is this something to
which one must be subscribed?

Also, the food network cookie site, I did find:

http://www.foodnetwork.com/food/12_days_of_cookies/

Thank you so much, Lavina! You're a doll!

Karen Marie

Lavina~ I receive the magazine and the pumpkins love it! They like to visually select the recipes for us to try out and cook! You're right..yummy yum yum!

We have a friend who buys me the same crappy garden book every year!!! It shows pictures of gardens and says the date. Useless, she knows I'm a gardener, not just some faker who goes to a nursery to point at plants and has the Mexicans put it in for 5 dollar an hour (respect to these people; they work HARD). I have this book 4 times now, and I can't give them away; they were on my curb for 2 weeks, with a stick-it on it saying "take me, free".
I say, have you own party, and invite people YOU like (or all of us DG'ers LOL)

Christie