Minding your own business...

Warning. I've not had but half a cup of coffee after
I was up all night long thinking about this, so yes, you
could say I'm a sourpuss.

Along with the time change and zero sleep, I could not
help but to lie awake thinking about what happened when
hubby and I grocery shopped yesterday.

We chose a self-checkout where a woman was just about
finished. At payment time, she announced that she had left
her credit card in her car. Okay, so we load all the groceries
back in the cart, tell her it's alright, and move to the next station.

At this station, anything that can go wrong with it does. As if
we were not already aggravated by the machine, two loud women
approached behind us, obviously MUCH more intelligent than we,
and proceeded to instruct every single detail about our purchase.
It didn't help that hubby decided today was the day HE would like
to learn how to use the machine.

So as I'm trying to show him how to do this, the machine is
not cooperating and the two loud women would just not shut up.

"You have to push that button"
"You gotta take it off the scale"
"You have to run that one again"
"Take that off the scale, run it again"

Each time, I would say "Mmm hmm." or "Yes, I know."
or "Yes, we've got it." The blonde woman kept leaning
into the middle of hubby showing him exactly how to do
it, when I said "WE'VE GOT IT" rather bluntly. Even hubby
was aggravated, saying "It's not like we haven't done this
before."

(Huh, hubby? This is your first time, not mine. I've only done
this 10,000 times now.)

After I said "We've got it." the second woman, who up until now
was relatively quiet, said "Well, that's just rude. Did you hear
that, you try to help someone..."

Blah...blah...something I couldn't quite make out. When I
gave her the "Lady, please!" look, she lowered her voice
but continued to mumble while the first woman continued
to instruct us.

Now it gets better. I swiped my credit card and guess what?
Having just come out of the washer and dryer that day, yep,
it wouldn't work. So now these big mouths delighted in telling
us that our card was declined, and rather loudly, I might add.
Hubby swipes his and after the machine farted around some more,
we were finally done.

In hindsight, I can think of ten things I should have, could have or
would have said, but a few were not so nice.

So folks, please, if we ask for your help, or we look at you with
a plea, then fine, offer. But we'll check our groceries, and you check yours.
And while I'm on the subject of ranting, if hubby and I are having a
conversation between ourselves, looking at you as you pass by
does not give you the green light to give your opinion on
our conversation. We don't want to know what kind of toilet
paper your family uses.

Ah, thank you for letting me get that off my chest.
Now I can move on with my day.

:-)

What an experience! I don't blame you a bit for needing to vent, and I'm glad it helped :-)
Hugs,
Sharon

Oh, Sharon, thank you so much!

I'm really not a bad or mad person, but that event was
absolutely not pleasant.

I often tell my husband that I am completely ruined. I'm
so used to a nice smooth daily life that these little interruptions
really do it to me.

I know I should not let it bother me, but that sort of thing
sticks with me and just dominates my every thought. Once
I get it all out, even as long as it takes to type, I feel so much
better.

Today is so much nicer. Calm breeze, good temps, sun
shining, bills paid, we're healthy, pets are fed, big Dagwood sandwich and
a glass of tea, and no one to bother me. Life doesn't get any better than this!

:-)

Good for you, to be able to let it go and know what good things are about! I find myself frustrated often when I go out "into" the world from my sheltered little dog-haven, and then tend to beat myself up over it. Still learning to "let it go."

The grocery line is one of those places, sometimes. I shop big when I go, because it's a 65 mile drive and if I go less, I spend less. I also take my own bags and pack my own groceries, so I can be organized in the car and when I get home. I can also decide not to unpack everything if it's dark and raining, if I've packed things according to how they get stored (ie. frozen and fridge stuff comes out first).

The cashiers have gotten used to me (most), but folks behind me get impatient. I don't take any longer (the cart is also organized and unloaded according to how items get packed), and I've waited my turn, but sometimes I get flustered and discombobulated when the next person takes my place at the pay station before I've paid, or my groceries are even finished being rung up. I admire folks who can just do what they need to do in their own time without being influenced by other's impatience.

WOW! I think we've all had grocery shopping nightmares!

I loathe going through the self check with produce but it's my husbands new favorite line. Don't you love when people CAN'T COUNT and go through the 20 items or 10 item lines?!?!?!?! Grrrr.

One time we shopped the grocery store was just packed. The lines were very long. A lady in front of us shopping held up the line while she ran back to get something. Then we waited on her to make several different forms of payments. Then when one of the few baggers on duty asked if she needed help out (I can't figure out how people walking around with their carts can't get their goods INTO their cars mind you) but of course she needed help. By the time our stuff was rung up it had been about 10 minutes later (and we bagged it ourselves) we proceded out the door past the same middle aged lady who'd needed help and was now handing her kids coins for the vending machine with claw to "win" a toy, while the bagger stood by helplessly wondering when he could unload her and get back to work! The look on his face said it all, it read, "Please help me!" Hehe.

I really wanted to say something to her but my husband is more kind and wouldn't allow me to. I've just learned NEVER to shop at night, it seems that's when everyone else is.

Oh, Alamo, too true. We learned never to shop the first Saturday of the
month ever again. Apparently everyone and their brother gets paid on
the first of the month and hits the store the next day.

;-)

My standard line for those women is: "Is there something I can pray with you about today cause you seem quite (use what ever they are doing to you) IE upset and I would like to help." That usually quiets them or you make a friend who needs your prayer.

Wuvie, they were rude! A little hint is sometimes welcome, and most people give you a chance to respond. Some people get the hint if you seem to politely thank them and go about your business. It's unfortunate that your card picked the wrong time to not cooperate -smile, but you definately got hassled!

My problem? Using any card you have to swipe. EVERY time, I do something wrong. I swiped too fast, I swiped too slow, I put in credit and I should have debited. Makes me feel dumb!

Alamo, my DH is too kind too, so I hear you.

Soferdig, you are kind and diplomatic.

This message was edited Apr 3, 2006 9:58 PM

No I am not kind but often have to deal with people who are mean because they are afraid of what is happening in their lives. I'm a vet and some diagnoses are tough. So when people are so above the norm in rudeness I often have to ask why and that is why I ask the question above. Oh yes I have let some have it too but that is easy for me to do and I want to lose that part of me. I always try to walk a mile in their shoes. Though some mean people (toxic people) I leave and let them chose their circumstances and concequences.

Sofer,

Without going into detail, these ladies were, shall we say...shady.
There is no walking even an inch in those shoes.

;-)

4Paws, would love to shop with you! I, too, like my groceries in order.
I don't want the cereal bagged with bread with a tomato and a can
of tuna. The cans go together, the boxes, the cleaning products in another
bag, the non-edible paper stuff, you've got it! Come shop with me! LOL

Wuvie,

LOL, my DH's only complaint when we shop is HOW the stuff gets bagged. Don't you hate when they just toss your nice organic tomatoes or potato chips a few feet down the conveyer???? This is one ignorance I don't have the guts to address when I stand in line but it sure burns my toast. =)

Has anyone else ever said something to the cashier/bagger about how they bagged your items????

You betcha, I have!

I've made comments about treating my tomatoes like gold, since they cost so much, or not smashing the bread or chips with the bag of onions, and commented that apples with bruises rot quickly. I've also given directions to the cashier and the bagger, but often they are not listening, especially if they're having their own conversation. I can't tell you how many times my bright turquoise, pink, and purple bags on the conveyor belt aren't seen, and baggers start packing into plastic (I always alert the cashier at the beginning, as well). Then, they put their bag into my bag, which is definately not acceptable. So, I mention it, take the food out, and give them the bag. Sometimes in a huff they throw it away, in which case I ask for it and stuff it into the pocket of my own bag for future use. One way or another, the point is conveyed. Regulars get to know me. The weak hearted run. (not really)

It's my food and money, after all, and it runs into a fair chunk of change, as you know. I try to be polite always (I don't do the prayer thing, and in fact, find God-talk directed to me by a stranger, quite offensive), and do it so I am helping or joking, but I've found that in certain cases it's just better to do the packing myself. I try to laugh when I am "relieving" a bagger of his duties, sometimes saying something about reliving my youth when I had such a job myself, or declaring myself an eccentric. (That's generally pretty obvious to the naked, open eye, anyway...lol)

When I haven't paid close attention, and found things messed up when I get home, I have called the store and talked to the manager. It's up to that person to train their staff, but I don't name names. Same for mistakes in prices. However, considering the drive to shopping, I prefer to get it right in the store.

I've only encountered a self-check stand once, and it was a bomb. It rang the item wrong. There are so many mistakes made by humans, I wouldn't trust the machine to get it right, either. It's rare I just buy a few things at a time.

My husband doesn't like grocery shopping with me because of my "systems." The ones that work for me and I am able to consistently do, I stick with. I've got enough chaos in soooo many other areas, but food is a top-of-the-line production in this house. Actually, because DH reacts just like the people behind me, I'd rather he go read a magazine if he's with me. He makes me nervous! lol He sure loves to eat, though!

(;-) Have a great day!

DH always goes. He likes to eat and is the one buying the unhealthy ''food.'' The checkers know me too. Most don't mind being relieved of their duties. If someone doesn't back away, I just smile, throw my hippie bags on the counter and say ''I'll pack.'' Most of them wouldn't be caught dead hauling in a clothes basket, are happy to go away and maybe snicker at me. My favorite I don't care line, is ''I'm older and I have more insurance.'' (Fried Green Tomatoes) Doesn't always make sense, but I like to say it!

billy, HAHA, I LOVE that line!!!

4paws, don't think they were trying to be mean about the offering of prayer, I think in this instance (and I may be wrong) but it's a good way to catch off guard the person who has over stepped their bounds in bothering you and while some may be sincere to offer a prayer for someone else because they seem to have so many problems with everyone else around them it may just be as easy way to get them to back off too. I know what you mean about the tomatoes like gold!!! I always try to pay top dollar in the hopes their flavor will tide me over until our garden crop comes in. =)

I didn't mention the time I was at Sam's Club (and you know the lines there are no better) and these 3 women with 3 different carts (all coming up to the head of the line at different times) were ringing all their stuff up together. By the time the cashier finally got it ALLLL rang up the 3 women were all rummaging around in their purses and ended up saying they didn't have money for almost 2 cart loads of it. The cashier was taking items off as they would pick them out of the cart while the dreadful line got even longer.....oh it was horrible. I personally would be just too darn embarrassed to take up THAT much and then not have the money or other payment to pay for it......I can understand a slight oversight but 2 carts, come on! Sheesh. Seems these kind of incidents happen much more in a big city. I wish there were more small grocery stores.

If it were me that short of cash (that's very short!), I think I'd just cancel the entire order so as not to inconvenience folks longer, as well as to prolong my embarrassment.

Alamoaimee, I did not consider the prayer offer came from a mean spirit at all. Rather, l prefer not have God be offered to me in anyway. Again, I would be polite, and usually have been when folks offer me their prayers or "God blessings," but I don't like it.

billyporter - you use a laundry basket? lol that's good. Except any unused laundrybasket around my house (well, even in use) gets shanghai'd by a dog. I have one under my computer desk - usually for my eldest and dearest Lady, but at the moment, Pete is snoozing in it. Lady is next to me, grumbling....lol (She'll just be in my lap soon).

4paws, that is so cute, I'da never thought of a laundry basket for a doggie bed!

LOL...you all just reminded me of something that happened
about a week ago.

In the middle of the night, I heard a crying commotion and
a death-defying "Rowr" with scratching.

I turned on the light to find that because I had left my dresser
open in a haste to get jammies, our cat; Figaro was now clinging to
the top drawer, apparently too tired to pull himself up into the
drawer. I presume his intentions were to sleep in there?

He couldn't bring himself to drop down to the floor, either,
so there he hung just crying for anyone to hear.

Poor baby was just trying to go sleepy night night!

(I admit it, we're pathetic with the animal attention around here, LOL)

Oh Wuvie that is so sad it's funny!
Paws, if there are clothes in it there, there is also a cat. I too don't like religon shoved down my throat. I do very well on my own thank you. I don't mind discussing religon, but I don't go to church, and I don't feel I'm lost. 'Nuff said.

Wuvie!

SO CUTE! I can't even have a drawer open 2 seconds and the cats want in it! I have 2 (boy/girl) both fixed, but the boy has frontal declaw, he's turned out to be a superior hunter though. Love the name you gave your cat! Awwwwe. =)

lol I can just imagine Figaro stuck like that. My cat, Radar, just loves to get in the drawers, too.

Believe me, dogs reign around here (but don't tell them - I'm the boss!) They're the ones who decided the laundry basket was cool.

A couple of months ago I bought a hardsided dufflebag at Ross - hard on one side, soft on the other. Before it was in the house ten minutes, one of the dogs decided it was a perfect bed. So I went to the thrift store and bought a medium sized hard-sided suitcase. It's a riot - usually there are two dogs in it - one each side. And the dogs who are too big to fit on one side, sleep across it! Keeps the sand off the floor if they've been to the river because it stays in the suitcase.

DOGS AND CATS ARE TOO FUNNY! Sorry to shout!

BUT THEY ARE! excuse me...I get excited sometimes, too.

Laugh!!!

Someone has to help me with this. Call me slow but......what is DH stand for? I'm thinking Darling Husband.

That's what I guessed - or dear husband.... (deadbeat husband? oh no, not on Dave's Garden! lol)

I like your name. Love worms.

Dear?

Yes, I guess that might fit.

Or any other four letter word beginning with a 'D'.

*snort* *chuckle*

Wuvie and 4paws, I'll join you on that shopping trip. I to like things packed a certain way.
I have my DS trained from an early age to pack things properly. He was even offered a job as a packer when the manager saw the way he packed my groceries. He had to decline though he was just 12 at the time.

It does not take any longer to pack, you just have to pay attention to what you are doing.

Susan

Kudos to your son, Susan! It really doesn't take longer to do things a certain "right" way, it's just the initial learning that takes a little more effort and time.

Like planting a garden. Do it right the first time, and you'll save lots of time later in weeding, watering, etc. I suppose it could apply to everything in life, eh?

4paws - Now that I shop before I come home after work. ( I work 3rd shift) I pack the same way but only have to take in the cold stuff and DS brings in and unpacks the rest when he comes home from school.

Susan

There you go, sbragonier! I'm thinking of training the dogs to pull a cart from the car to the house...lol
(not really; the 9 of them would mess it all up; but I do use a wheelbarrow sometimes!)

Some times I think it is easier to train the dog than the kid, but that is another thead all together.

lol
it's easier to train kids, dogs, and about anything else except my DH....
He makes shopping so much worse, because when he's with me and we go through the line, he acts like I'm from Mars. Now isn't that special?

(maybe he's training me to give up on him doing what I need)

Paws,

A wheelbarrow to haul in the groceries.
I thought I was the only one, LOL.

It's official. We were separated at birth.

:-)

We've used the wheelbarrow too.
DH goes with me because I don't drive. He puts the cookies in when I'm not looking.
(No I don't drive. I am not a multitasker and don't have good reaction times. I feel I'm safer where I am.) But there are times I wish I did.

Wuvie, you've totally explained it. That's where the sensible, normal side of me went....lol

Billy, my husband didn't drive until I taught him after a year of marriage. (Tell you what, that is a good start for divorce!) He was 46.

Laugh!