A request to change my nick

A couple of hours ago a gigantic stone feel from my chest. As some of you know, me and my kids have had protected identity and even been living underground from my sons father. Today I got a visit from the police, they where notifying us that my sons father was found dead in a village just a half hour drive from where I currently live. May God have mercy on his soul and forgive him, because I cant
16 years of living in fear is finally over and for the first time in all these years I actually dare to put my real name out there. SO
I would like to have my full name as a nick and written like this
JanettDemski

((((Janett Demski))))

OMG Janett! I don't feel that making remarks that his passing is a good thing would be appropriate but I want you to know that I am very happy that you do not have to live in fear any longer. May you enjoy your new free life! I think you oughta just go with Demski. It sounds so cute! LOL

LoL Chele I want the full thing, Its my way of confirming that I INDEED am free
(((((imway2dumb))))) back
The scariest part is knowing that we lived just 1/2 hour apart. Remeber that we are not many people in this country, only 9 million and two of those millions live in the capitol and two in the second largest city.
Janett

Alright then, my little Demski! I dub the "reborn a free lady" Janett Demski! Congrats!

Hurray JanettDemski. Here's to a new beginning. May God bless you as I know he already has cause he has kept you safe.
Hugs&blessings ... elaine

Oh how scarey for you!! Glad you can feel safe now- you ARE a new person!!

((((HUGS)))) and a big sigh of relief for you.

Janett, I know what a relief that is. I have been grateful I didn't have any kids with # 3 because the 3 months we were married was living h___!
As a result I figured if I could be beat like a man, I could work like one and would never have to depend on a man for my living again.
That led to this great life I have had running all over the South and East of the USA as a Heavy Equipment Operator and now a Boilermaker.
I Hope in Sweden there is some program set up as we have here to help support your kids after his death.
God bless you and the kids who may have mixed feelings at this time.
Sidney

Thanks everyone,
I will keep a close eye on my son for ANY sign that he is having a difficult time with this.
From what I know, Christer is his only heir and it is he who has to do all the paperwork, I do know he doesnt want to go to a funeral. I will take care of that and the paperwork so he dont have to deal with it.
We have talked and he said he just feel so peacefully relieved and I want him to stay that way. Its a big change from the burning hate he have had for so many years.
One good thing is, with Tony´s death maybe my son can regaine the contact with his Grandmother, she to had to go into hiding from her own son and we lost contact because of that and we where really close.
Christer grew up with spending all summers with Tony´s parents and his fathers madness stole his grandparents away from him and now its only Grandma left, So keep your fingers crossed for that.
Janett

JanettDemski, I'm happy for you. Now you are truly free.
Give this some time and everything will come together for you and your son.
Andy P

Welcome home Janett !
Al

Oh my goodness Janett! I am speechless! My heart soared reading your post.
-Garity

Okey it will be official. sometime soon Terry will change my nick to
Janett_D

Bless your heart Janett (((hugs))). I'm so glad that you, your son and MIL are now free! I hope you two are able to reunite with her and get back to being a family.
Vicki

And none too soon ((((Janett Demski)))). . .how sad for you and your son to live that way. I'm so glad you had beautiful surroundings like that stately tree outside your window to gaze at every morning, to at least ease the pain. Now you both can feel freeeeeee. . . . . . Very, very happy for you both and your extended family. 8-)) Janet

Janet just wanted to say welcome to your new LIFE and FREEDOM.

I feel like I have been running a marathon with no end and finally discovered the finish line. I am a very open person and have been hindered to do so many things the last 16 years or use my pets for cover, or do it totally behind the scene or not to do it at all just to keep my son as safe as I can. I dont feel ashamed of the Tayson80, But its not me, thats my dog.
I will how ever settle for Janett_D as a nick :0)). As Terry stated there is other nuts out there.
((((((((HUGS))))))) to you all.........My extended family
Janett:_D

Edit to say: this is actually the first place I have dared to sign my post with my first name

This message was edited Feb 9, 2006 2:36 AM

I am happy for you. I thought it was not a good idea to use your full name. I still think Demski sounds awful cute, like a fish or dog or something. LOL

Really, you have been kind, helpful and giving since you arrived here at DG and I am happy we met and became friends. :)

Janett I am so glad for you, and I do know how you will have been feeling. I had a bully of a husband who I managed to leave after 18 years, and I spent the next 2 years in total fear as I struggled to get a divorce, I got a job in a Post Office, and he used to come every week and wait for me to serve him. I had no choice, I will never forget the feeling of fear, my heart would thump, my stomach screw up. Every time the phone rang or there was a knock on the door I was petrified. I just wanted to be spirited off the planet. I saw a well known psychic who asked me if he had asked to see me, he had, and I knew if I went that he would shoot me from the top window, he had a shotgun, and the psychic also asked if he had a gun. You have been lucky to have had police protection, I know your life has been on hold, but now you can move on and enjoy life as everyone should be allowed to. I wanted mine dead, and I don't mind saying it, I just wanted an accident to happen to free me, I understand fully how you must be feeling, this terrible weight having been lifted from you.
No one person has the right to make another's life a misery, yet we are so powerless to stop them, and the law allows them to make your life a misery. They should be locked away! May he get his just desserts in his fiery hell! For I KNOW he will be there!

Freedom is sweet, hugs and happiness to you and your family,

Another Janet

Janet what a relief you must feel!! Freedom is a wonderful thing and it comes to all of us in different ways. Hugs to you and yours and here's to a new beginning!!
Ronnie

Exit stage left tayson. Welcome to DG Janett_D!!!!

This message was edited Feb 9, 2006 12:43 PM

Badseed you missed on T :0)):0)):0)):0)) and for the dog-part HA dogs are four legged and I do only have two, Think I would trip and fall over to much with two extra to keep track of.

((((wallaby1.))))) Oh how I wish we could build a Disney of Horror for them and send all of them there.

Feels SOOOOO good that the rest of my life is ALL up to me and my kids. Also found out that my son actually has a little sister of 1 1/2 years old named Gabriella, spent two hours talking to her mom, and she too where relived since she have lived the same life of horror the last two years. She was one of those who blamed his behavior on her self. Took that right out of her, So I think some things are going to be BIG changes and all to the better.

Dave, Trish and Terry and the rest of the crew. From the bottom of my heart. Thank you for this great place.
Janett Demski
Janett_D

Darn it! I KNOW better! Fixing it. LOL

Janett, I'm happy for you, believe me I know how you've been feeling the last 16 years.

Big Hugs

Melissa

This may sound weird, but....

Happy Birthday Janett_D!

Welcome to the world of freedom, safety and peace.

mg

I like it! "Disney of Horrors" Free tickets too, wow a merry-go-round that never stops inflicting their return of pain. Mine is still alive, I haven't heard from him for years, but he does have contact with my youngest. That is a bit scary for me. He used to write 30 pages of waffle to me every 2 days and post it personally when he found where I was, he said he will see me again in heaven. (That was HORRIBLE). He even phoned me, I screamed down the phone at him for half an hour and told him JUST how it was. I told him he wasn't going to heaven, he would be in Hell! I made a vow to myself that all those who have crossed me would go to Hell. I would be there personally at those gates and give them the thumbs down! That is the only way we can make ouselves smile at it all, and get our justice!

That poor other woman, she was lucky. I hope you two can become good friends, she will also be needing support, and perhaps you can make yourself stronger by giving it to her. When I felt down, I told myself there were lots of people in the world worse off than me, and it DOES make you feel better!

I wish we could all have a big PARTY, this is a time to celebrate!

((((((Janett_D))))) from Janet

Oh Janett ---
I am so happy that you have peace at last.
I KNOW the horror that you have had to live, but all of that is behind you now.
You REALLY ARE A SURVIVOR for sure now.

And, for the record, I too am a 'Survivor'!
I was very lucky because I took itsy-bitsy steps over 'many years'
to get away from my lunatic ex of 20-years.
Actually, 'I WROTE THE BOOK'!

Janett, you can now have a wonderful and beautiful life of freedom. . .
Everyday will now be a new one for you to look forward to
instead of having to always be looking over your shoulder.

And yes, so right.....
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Emma

Janett,

What a burden that has been lifted from your shoulders. I can't even imagine what you have been going through, or having to hide out and look over your shoulder every where you went. Now there's only one thing left to do... Seize the moment... I'm so happy for you that you can live a normal life now. To new beginnings, treasure each moment now that he has given you.
Tami

Janett, congratulations on your renaissance. I wish you many, many carefree years.

Incidentally, have you noticed how comprehensive this name change is? I returned to some threads where I had communicated with you, and not only is your name changed in the "author" box, but it's even been changed in my postings. One of my responses, for instance, now says "Thank you, Janett...." It's quite amazing, isn't it? You are officially reborn.

Janett_D,
Congratulations & my best wishes to you, your family and all the other women & families who live in fear. Sometimes it is embarrassing to be a man.
Peace,
Dave47

Oh Dave47....we love the good ones! {{{{{{{HUG}}}}}}} After reading your story Janett, I did have to go give my DH a big hug and thank him for being so wonderful to me.

-Garity

I'm so very happy for you, your son, your mother-in-law. To be free of that awful fear must feel so wonderful. Congratulations on your new life!

Janet...This is such a wonderful day for you!! You have been so outgoing that it is a shock to find out what terrible things you have been going through.....Welcome to FREEDOM and Happiness. Jo

Dave47, you have nothing to be ashamed about. One thing we must not forget there ARE women out there that are equally horrible to there hubby.
And I can imagine that it is dang much harder for a man to seek help and cover and maybe have to admit that they are equally terrorised as we whore by a female half there size with out being the laughing stock in there hometown.
So never feel embarrassed over what other people have done, okey?
Janett

Janett_D, Welcome to your new life, May you live long and prosper in it and find a renewed sense of worth and well-being. i am so happy for you.

a friend of mine was stalked for many years and it turned her into a hermit, afraid to go anywhere or do anything. several years ago she got a call from her hometown police saying they had found him dead at home of natural causes. sometimes there is justice in this world.

Just plain wonderful. A whole 'new' world. /;-)
And now wherever you go.... I hope you dance. ;-) ~Blooms

Janett, I know I personally have nothing to be ashamed of. However, it is discouraging to see how much of the violence in the world comes from one gender.
There are lots of good men. But as a whole, we sure can make a mess of things.
But enough of that. This is the time for your metamorphesis! You go girl! (American expression)
Dave

I hope you have a new journey in your life and that it's all good...T's &P's are with you..

Loretta...

Just to let you know its not always men we need to fear. I have a 1 year restraining order against my oldest daughter-in-law who resently beat me over the head with a telephone receiver. I'm happy to say my son is divorcing her.

Janett - I'm so glad you don't have to fear any longer. I hope my DIL can get help with her anger problems, but right now I seriously doubt it. Best of luck with the rest of your life.

Becky