Have to say goodby :(

Hello Dave, Team and friends at DG
Hello.
I have a problem, I have to Fly to Switzerland this Friday (my dad is in hospital) with brain bleeding, In German the name is Hirn Blutungen (don't know in English sorry.
I had to book a flight emergency and all our savings plus I had to borrow some money to be able to get there, I won't be back for my subscription, my flight is booked so far for the 17 of October, but there could be changes,
So this means I won't be able to afford the subscription, sorry :(
I will miss DG but I can't change the financial status here. I know that the amount is not much, but I'm totally blank, this trip sure put a dent in our wallet.

I try to get on line from Switzerland to say good by to all of you if I can't make it online from there this will be my GOOD BYE!! snif snif
It's very sad that I have to go, but I can't change things.
please say a prayer for my dad.
HUGS
Carmen (zameluzza)
BYE

Carmen, thoughts and prayers are with you and yours. Please travel safely and keep in touch.

Carmen, you are already missed. We will remember you and await your return. Doesn't sound too good for your future plans but we know you will make it through. I am not religious but I believe every spirit lives as long as someone remembers them. Frank

So sorry to hear about your Dad. It is hard to be so far away from loved ones. It is cases like your that the Garden Angel fund is for. Just let Dave know.

Oh my god , you guys are the best,
I just finished to clean up a little more before I go, tomorrow I don't have much time left, still fieldwork and cleaning up.
then now 12.03 am I came on line to see if I had any mail from my sister in Switzerland and what do I find,
an e-mail from Dave :) a garden angel has paid my subscription, I have tears in my eyes again, thanks so much with all my heart, this time they are happy tears, the past few days when I talk to my mom, we always cry on the phone because of my dad.

I'm exhausted from everything I have to do before I go, I'm on Advil like a cow is on grass.

my good friend stopped in and lent ed me her lab top to bring with me, she said that if I can get on the Internet somewhere I should use it, plus I can show my dad pictures of us here if he is well to see them, I have copied all my pictures that I had taken in a few years for him on CD.
I hope I can use the laptop in the hospital. He will see my daughter, he has only seen her once 4 years ago when he came for a few days to Canada for the christening of my sisters son.

well I better get to bed before I fall asleep here.

GARDEN ANGELS
if you read this, thank you so much for helping me out in this hard time.
Carmen

Carmen, I'm so glad the Garden Angels are alive and kicking - we'd miss you if you couldn't post. Where in Switzerland will you be? Does your friend's laptop (what a blessing) have a wi-fi card?

GW good morning I'm going to be close to Bern,
I'm not sure if it has WI-FI
I think I not eaven know what this is, where could i see if it's there, and what can I do with it?
It's a top of the line labtop I did not look at it very good yet, but will before I leave .
Carmen
PS: yes the garden angels are the best.

Carmen

Prayers for your Dad, you and the rest of your family Carmen. Have a safe flight and know our thoughts are with you.
Janet

Wi-fi is wireless network capability. If her card has a wireless card in it, you could go to what are called "hot spots" and access the Internet, sometimes for free. If you're staying in a hotel, some have ethernet ports where you can plugyour computer into them and connect that way. Ask your friend and see what she says.

Even if you can't access the internet with it, just being able to show your dad the photos will be terrific!

Carmen, praying for you, your Dad and your family. Have a safe trip.

thanks GW, yes it has wireles, and no no hotel, I will be staying with at my parents house.

I don't thing there are hot spots in "worblaufen"

but yes showing the pictures to my dad and mom will be good.
I'm making my last preparations, have to leave from here around lunch time tomorrow.
was supposed to have 2 theeth pulled wistomtheeth today, but the dentist said he won't do it because I could have problems. so he gave me some more meds and hopefully I will be OK.

Elise thanks
Again thanks to everyone for the prayers, and I will post back as soon as I can.
will try to peek in tomorrow morning and just before leaving.

Carmen

Carmen, my dad had bleeding in the brain last fall due to too much blood thinners, and when it was stopped, he started having panic attack seizures almost like epilepsy. It scared the hell out of me the first time because I was alone with him and he suddenly sat up, terrified and trying to form words but unable to. After the fact, the neurologist said they were caused by the scar tissue from where the bleeding had stopped.

Take care, and give him lots of hugs.

Carmen,
I'm SO glad the Garden Angels were there for you. Wishing you safe travels, & hoping your dad is well. Take care of yourself,

Shannon

Carmen, I'm praying for your Vati (dad), for you and all the family.

I agree with you: Garden Angels are wonderful. They were there for me too while I was on vacations.

Have a safe trip and keep us posted.

Prayers for your Dad, you & your loved ones, Carmen Be strong....

Hi dear friends,

I made it to Switzerland, and was able to connect the laptop my friend lented to me, here I can connect the internet just to the phoneline, I won't stay on for to much.

My dad is not in good shape, I was so scared when I sah him, he reconized me, but then after a wile he could not talk any more, his speech comes and goes. he can't remember words, is confused and in pain. last night they took him back for a CT scan (not sure if this is the name) the big tube.

today he was very good compared to yesterday, but at night he was different again, this is so hard to explain. it's scary. he can't remember things, he talked to us and he can'tfind the word of something he just answers in between, like he said the whole sentence.
I have a very hard time dealing with this, when I'm at the hospital I have to cry many times.
you know my dad knows that something is wrong, and then he starts to cry to.
the doctors can't say what will happen next, but we just hope for the best.

Carmen

PS: just a quick note about Switzerland.... I WANT TO GO HOME, the roads are scary, the peoples are all stressed out and the city changed soooooooooooooo much, I feel lost.
I drive my dad's car to the trainstation here in town, then we take the train to Bern and then the Bus to the hospital.

the day after tomorrow I will open the small store, and try to get it going again, my mom needs the extra funds that come in from there. we will take turns on going to the hospital,

please keep on praying

Carmen, I keep praying.

Carmen, I'm glad you arrived safely. Still praying for you and your family.

Carmen, thanks for letting us know you got there, I understand what you mean about city traffic and the rush rush around you of people who know just how to get where they want to go, while you're looking for the right way for you.

For the most part it is usual for patients to be worse in the evening and to have a little more speech and thought problems at that time. The hardest part is always that it's your parent being so sick and that is almost terrifying some times. We will all keep you in our blessings.
~Blooms

Carmen,

He probably knows something is wrong, but may not be able to make the connection in his mind all the time. Talk to him, tell him over and over what has happened and that they are working to make him better. He probably won't retain it well, but I found that the things that were in simple terms, and repetitive seemed to last. If you can develop a short explanation for him, and keep repeating it, it might help with the confusion. I found that it was easier to encourage simple sentences or choices rather than complex. Kind of "Do you want some coffee?" as opposed to "Would you rather have coffee or juice?"

I stayed nights with my Dad, so my Mom could sleep, and she took days. He was very definitely worse at night. I don't know why. All I could do, was hold him and reassure him, much the same way he did when I was little and scared of thunderstorms.


Hugs.

hi friends,
today was very bad, he did not talk at all, he understood everything but just could not speek, lost the feeling in his right arm. and this started last night and the whole day today.

I taked to the doctor and he said that this was not normal, they are testing him tonight all over again.

will know more tomorrow.
I make my messages short, but I read and I'm verry gratefull to all the messages I get from you.
thanks
Carmen

Carmen, take some time out for yourself, he is in good care, so you us care for yourself, I made that mistake wheh my mother was so ill. Get as much rest as you can, and eat well, don't neglect yourself.
Carmen I hope you remember me. Norma Lewis

Hi Friends,
thanks so much again for all the support.
My dad is back in surveliance care,
he still does not talk and now they talked about epilepsy, we don't know what's going on, he is on IV and if this does not helpin 3 days they have to look for other answers.
today it seemt that he was all surprised to see me!! does he not remember I came to Switzerland???
one doctor said he had a Subdurales Hämatom and today they talked about a cronic one.
My mom is at the last of her strengt.
today we opened the store and we could not wait to get to him at noon, we have to open the store, she has to pay the bills :(

this whole situation sucks, I try to help as much as I can, and when I go outside to have a smoke I loose it. good thing my mom does not see me like this.

well have to go, write some more mails and go to bed, I'm still not used to the timechange, not tired at all, but have to get some sleep.

I wish my husband was here, I need him more then ever right now.

bye till tomorrow.
Carmen
PS: Norma sure I remember my hoya friend ;) thanks for beeing here for me to.
HUGS

(((((Carmen))))) It's hard being thrown into a stressful situation, having someone you love in jeopardy, and being away from your closest family support. I'm praying for you.

Hi Carmen, I hope you are OK. My dad died of spinal cancer and when I went to see him I always wanted DW along, I coudn't say anything. DW asked if he liked the nurses, what he saw on TV, Kept him interested in life. When all I saw was a dying man. I am amazed she still likes me. I know I was being selfish. I'm not done with my dad. He can't die. DW's dad lived with us til hospital for 10 days. "Congestive Heart Failure" Carmen, the only thing I have learned is the older you get, the more people you used to know. I wish your dad a peaceful...Frank

Carmen, you might check out the Caregivers forum. There are a lot of people there who have been in similar situations as yours, and understand what you are going through.

Hi everyone,
I came back to Canada the 4th of November.
My dad is doing fantastic, I would have never thought that he would recover so well. prayer sure helped.
I was not much online the time is was there, 4 times the most I think. just did not have the time.
I did work on theyr store every day.
I'm glad I'm back home,I missed my family so much. Lorisha grew a lot in these weeks.
My DH took super care of my plants, he had to move all my hoyas from the outdoor greenhouse to the house.
my SIL also had 2 boxes full at her house, they are still there, just waiting for a warmer day to get them.
they lost a few, I'm not sure what, and I hope there are no Hoyas among them.
before I came home I took my mom and dad to the forest and to the mountains, I had 3 super days that I can say I enjoyed when I was there.

I wantet to thank everyone of you for the support and strenght you all gave my.
HUGS
Carmen

PS: this picture was taken in Adelboden the cross way up is very importand to my mom.

Carmen, hello! It's great to have you back and so good to hear your dad's doing well. And your hoyas, LOL!

zameluzza, glad things are looking better. Loved the photo and could even see the cross way up high. What a beautiful setting.

Welcome back, Carmen - good to hear that things are looking up - both figuratively and literally! What a beautiful photo. Thanks for sharing it with us.

Shannon

Carmen - this is great news!!! Glad to hear your father is better. What did they find was the cause of his bleeding? Were you and your mother able to keep the store going? How delightful to find your plants were in such good hands....you have a very good DH for sure.

Blessings, Brenda

Thanks everyone,
what the doctors said was he had a Subdurales Hämatom. I don't know in english.
when they opened him up they found some dry blood in there to, not just the liquid blood.
he had very bad head pain 3 weeks prior to the day he went to the hospital. So he took Aspirin. that did not help because it made the blood thin.
they asked him if he had hurt his head somewhere, but he does not know of something like that happend.

At the beginning my mom and I went to the store, but then my mom had a bad bad cold, pneumonia... she gave all her energie to my dad and then she colapsed.
then I took over the store for weeks, just me *LOL* at the beginning I was scared!! I'm usaly very shy around peoples. plus I had a hard time with the money.. had to double check every time.
I did not use the cash registar........ wahhhhhhhhh was to hard for me.
used a calculator with paper roll. worked very good.

I made a few new friends, some old ladies they are our loyal customers, they live close to the store and don't go to the city to make groceries.
sometimes I delivered to them when it was to heawy.
one had 2 cats and the cat litter was to heawy for her.
the other one liked wine so I delivered the wine.
another older lady used to farm, and at the beginning when I took over the store she was kind of not to friendli with me, but when she asked me what I work at home, and I told her I farm, she completly changed, she came every night just to talk and to say hello, I was her schaetzeli ( sweetheart) *LOL*
another guy was a hiker, we talket lost about the mountains.

I miss these peoples they kinda grew on me :)
but I'm also very glad to be home.
I try to post a picture of the store.
Carmen

and one from the inside.

It looks nice, Carmen! You're brave to have handled it all by yourself at that difficult time. Everyone should be someone's schaetzeli. :-)

Shannon

(edited for clumsy fingers)

This message was edited Nov 20, 2004 5:42 PM

Thanks Shannon,
I kinda had to do it. The rent had to get paid and plus I did it for my parents ;)
I'm my husbands schaetzeli ;) ;)
Carmen

Carmen - now you are 2 people's schaetzeli!!!! LOL

You're parents must be so very proud of you. What a challenge you had and yet you stepped up to the task because you knew it was the only option. You are a very wonderful daughter and I sure there are at least two other people that think so too!

Carmen, I'm so happy your dad is doing well! Nice deli-store.

Carmen, great to hear your dad is doing better, and their store looks wonderful.

You are a wonderful daughter. Top of the line. I am sure your parents are very proud.
I want to say Thank You for opening the store so things could get paid. So many nursing homes are filled here in America with people that never see their children and are left there and forgot about. What a true blessing you are. Not all of Americans do this but it is way too many.
I know being there and DH here had to be hard.
I am so glad your dad is doing great. and you are back home.
Tell your parents we send our love.
Blessings,
Sandy