I was serious

Karrie,

There is something to be said for "Southern Hospitality", but it is also true about carrying around the luggage back from the day. I am from New England and when I first moved to KY, I had to deal with the "yankee, go home" attitudes. My saving grace was getting involved in a wonderful church and they became my family 'away from home'.

When I go back to New England, I can see the difference in the attitudes of people. I think, generally, most people are well meaning....it is just the way they carry themselves. What you think is rude may not actually be to those that have lived in that area forever.

GW is right....the grass is always greener on the other side or you always want what's not yours (or can't have). :) Remember the Serenity Prayer....'God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.'

As far as Phoenix, I have heard from so many people that that is a great place to live. My mother who has never lived anywhere else, went to Phoenix to visit and came home feeling like she'd like to live there.

I wish you peace of mind, my friend. Kathy

I live in Southern Arizona...just got home from Tucson...nice place to visit...but I wouldn't want to live there...mush less Phoenix. Phoenix is very warm in the winter but I like my area better...less traffice! I love Arizona in general though....very friendly place...I loved Florida tooo....very friendly place....I loved Virginia too....very friendly place....same with WV!! HEY! Maybe it's because I'M very friendly too. LOL Jo

JO, You are very lovable, that's what it is....I do believe you know no strangers. :)

Misty...you would not believe that I was one shy gal in High School...even up until I became a 4-H leader...I learned as much as they did. Thanks for the compliment.... Jo

RR - I used to be very shy as well, until I was given the title of editor at the school paper - had to clean up my act on that fast! lol!

I'm still shy. But maybe one day.... :>?

Shoe? Shy? Huh??????

Just my 2 cents for all it's worth. I am a Ga Peach and proud of it. Never lived anywhere else. Never been anywhere I preferred over Ga.

I once worked at a software development and consulting firm and we had people from all over. One in particular, a guy from Connecticut was always complaining about Georgia for one reason or another and singing the praises for Connecticut. I had to ask, if Connecticut was so great and you hate Georgia, why do you stay here. He told me because the work was here. Well, I am a firm believer in when in Rome do as the Romans do so IMHO, he would have been better received had he been a little nicer about Georgia. Kind of like you can talk about your family but you get really defensive when someone else does.

Another incident, I do work at Lockheed Martin and of course, we have folks from all over the world. I started there in 1986 got laid off in 1988 when a lot of folks were going to Burbank, California. Somewhere around 1990 or 1991, Burbank closed and lots of Californians came to Georgia. Of course they sang the praises of CA and belittled Georgia. Well, guess what, many of them have now retired and still living in Georgia because they have come to love it!!!

At work, we also have to endure diversity training and ethics training some of which is a joke to most of us. For instance, one ethics scenario, someone complained about a group of hispanics speaking spanish and playing their music loudly. I guess I am treading seriously on being politically incorrect here, but I go back to when in rome do as the romans do. If English is not your 1st language, but you live in a predominately English speaking country, well I think you should speak English or at least attempt to learn it - if I move to a spanish speaking country, I seriously doubt they will conform to my language.

I'm afraid I got seriously off track here and sincerely hope I offended no one - that was not my intent. I do usually speak my mind on things but with no malice and sometimes probably do hurt feelings which is not my intent. I ramble, too, have you noticed?

Angelsong, I think it is a sad day when you are not welcome in a church and hope you will find one that you feel comfortable in and welcomed with open arms.

I am basically very shy (although people who know me don't believe that). I have been very active in the March of Dimes for the last 3 or 4 years and it has really helped me with the shyness. And of course, I do smile and speak to more people and find that it is usually returned.

Okay, off my soapbox. Did I say anything that made any sense?
Brenda

Plantnutz, were we twins separated at birth????? You echoed my sentiments so well it's eerie. I too have a prob. being politically correct and not hurting people. But you can never please everyone when you speak your mind but I always try to tell folks that I mean no malice or disrespect. We all have our opinions and should express them as kindly as possible. I have really enjoyed this thread!!!

Berrygirl, too funny. I've always wondered about my family. I almost made reference to your first post when I was rambling. Sometimes I will blurt out something out of the blue and my husband will say, that is scary, I was just thinking about the same thing.

I grew up within a couple of miles of where I live now and it is hard to adjust to change sometimes. This used to be the country. Atlanta and suburbs do seem like a metropolis now, a melting pot or lack of a better term. I battle with change at work constantly, not so much for my sake but others who really have trouble with change. My motto is I have no problem with change if it is for the better but lately it does not always seem for the better. I guess I just can't see the big picture.

I have a really big problem with Happy Holidays instead of Merry Christmas, taking prayers out of schools, etc. so as not to offend anyone. Well, what about me? I'm offended by a lot that is going on now. I've always been a live and let person. What you do doesn't concern me unless you are infringing on me or mine but doesn't it seem our rights are slowly being taken away. I jumped right back on that soapbox, didn't I? Sorry.
Brenda

i'm super super shy called frigid hard, ect. but you hide your hurts..since been sick i talk to anyone who will answer no matter where at!!! everyone seems nice friendly now.. in Georgia my sister law used to say about yankees remember i'm one say oh not yu honey child.i'm minn. most all were so sweet down there ..wash. a friend moved there 30 yrs ago loves it.. seattle. a place is a place, make it to be what like enjoy....i do not love ok. but i'm fine been 39 yrs.. so be home always...

This whole cultural thread has been interesting.

I have a big change in a month (I rec'd a job offer on Friday and am 99% sure I'm going).

I'm originally from New Mexico and Texas, five years in upstate New York and will be moving to Dublin, Ireland. It will be quite interesting to see how people are the same or different.

Everywhere I have lived, I've had no 'noticeable' accent. That is due to change. :)

But, the good part - it does remind me of a story (hope I don't mangle it too much) of a man meeting two people leaving a town who asked about people in the next town. He asked them how people were in their previous town. One said good, one said bad. The wise man said, that's what you'll find in the new town.

Sbarr...my point exactly!! Good luck in Dublin...and I know you will make lots of friends. Jo

I think that the friendly atmosphere or lack of, is a result of the mixture of cultures, the in-flux of people from different parts of the country, and the types of companies in the area.
As an example, I agree with Windy in her post, Fort Worth Texas is one of the friendliest cities I have seen ( I lived there for 22 years). On the other hand, I have generally found that Dallas people are a little cool, or even a bit snobbish.
The strange thing is that you can't tell where Ft. Worth ends and Dallas begins. It is practically one big city with the downtown areas 30 miles apart.
The difference is, I believe, in the demographics. Ft. Worth is really an overgrown "cow-town" with its start being in the cattle and oil industry with a lot of old money people to improve the city. Dallas is "new money", a corporation headquarters with a lot of residents from somewhere else and few people over 25 or 30 years of age who are natives. They can't seem to get together or want to get together to make a better city. The old Dallas civic leaders have died out.
The only reasons that I would move from up north to down south would be for better climate or gardening zone.
Just my 2 cents worth.

Sbarr, You will love Ireland!!!! My daughter went over there for a couple of months for an archeological dig. She lives in a farmhouse with an Irish family. She fell in love with the country and didnt want to come home. She said even the air smelled different.The pictures she brought back were incredible. She still has contact with the friends she met over there. She was so impressed with the dance over there, she took up irish dancing when she returned.

Very interesting thread. For my .02, I was born 25 miles from where I live now. I have been in all but four of the states, made a circle in Europe, quite a bit of South America, and been in most of Canada, quite a bit of Mexico. Still really wouldn't want to live anywhere else than this small part of Washington. I haave to agree with the rest of you who said we meet just about who we expect to. The bad thing about this area now is the poor economic situation, but I still love it.

Sbarr hope your job and move to Ireland works out well for you. I've always wanted to go to Ireland and Scotland but never did get to . Donna

I have enjoyed reading this thread! For my .02, I've grown up in San Diego, in the 70's, Moved to Maryland in the mid 80's, Back to CA in 1991, and now firmly planted (ahem) in Seattle, Washington since 1993. Thank goodness, I've got some roots and my children are growing up here. Am I still a Southern California girl? You bet. Have I gotten used to the weather...well...yes.
The question about people in different places? My Opinion? All the same. No matter where you go, people are the same. I had this dreamy notion that when we moved to MD that my life would change. It did not. The people 'talk' a little differently, but there was no difference in our lifestyle, or that of anyone else I met.
You get what you give. I had to learn that, after leaving my 'comfort' zone in San Diego. I had to put myself out there and make friends. Each move was very hard, because I had to leave close friends behind, but you make new friends after time. I guess my point is, put yourself out there...don't stay at home. Join a bowling league, a golf club. Anything to put yourself in contact with others. It is totally worth it. Good luck, and let me know if you are ever in the Seattle area!

I was in alot of turmoil when I started this thread. There were times I wish I wouldn't have started it. But after reading the posts and especially the last one from Sue, I'm glad that I did.

I've calmed down since the start of this thread, have landed what I feel is a good job, and am getting busy again. I think part of my anxiety happens most during the winter and early spring - because I can't be outside doing things. I have noticed I am always most easily upset in February & March.

Well, guess what - it's supposed to get to almost 60 here on Monday. I don't have to work until 4pm, so I am going to get up at a reasonable hour and do some much needed work outside. I know that the exhaliration that I will feel will help brighten up my spirits. Starting the seeds indoors helps a wee bit, but actually getting out there is the best. I miss my morning coffee walks around the place.

Anyways, point taken. Home is where your heart is. But I still know where I'm going on my next vacation!

You go get 'em, Karrie! I get blue in the winter months, too, and the last few days of nicer weather has sure been a boon to me, too. Keep that chin up! :)

Karrie--FWIW I too suffer a mild form of SAD (seasonal affective disorder). I couldn't believe it when my doctor suggested it, because my "blues" come in May during the peak of Spring. My favorite time of year has ALWAYS been Spring. But, alas, after 3 years I realized that sure enough every May I fall into some gloomy, weepy depression for unknown reasons. It lasts 2-3 weeks and my husband is at a total loss of what to do to bolster my spirits.

My Dr. said that SAD does happen in Spring but is generally much more common in later winter after folks have been shut in for several months. Maybe that's what you were experiencing. You might ask yr Dr next time your in to see them.

Glad to see you're feeling better. Brenda

There is some help for Seasonal Affective Disorder in the form of special lamps. Search under "SAD lamps" under Google or other search engines and you will find several manufacturers and information.
You probably already knew this, but just in case.
Bill

Hi - I'm a new member and have really enjoyed reading this thread. My husband and I are going to retire to the South in 2 years - we live in So. California now. We love the South and realize there are drawbacks to living there just as there are to other places - including the lovely but crowded area we live in now. We go to to the East Coast every year - so far cities for possible retirement are:

Williamsburg, VA (love Colonial Williamsburg)

La Grange, KY (gotta love a town with the train running down the center of the street)

Savannah, GA (wish we had a gazillion dollars to buy a house facing one of the lovely squares)

New Bern, NC (just adore the artsy downtown area and Tryon Palace)

Annapolis (old town), MD (expensive but a very happening place (sailboat capital of the world)

Welcome to DG, cattknap....glad to have you. I love all those places too...except La Grange, KY....never been there ....YET! Jo

Howdy Cattnap (from the South!). A hearty Welcome to DG!

Come on in! Sit a spell!

Hope to see you around the site!

Karrie, something I do too when I get to feeling ICKY in the winter time is go to the Tanning bed. I know some say it's not good for you, but I don't figure 10 visits or so will hurt me any. It always makes me feel better. :-)

I read about it somewhere once, lack of sunshine helping in causing the blues.... don't know where. LOL

But, it does help... it might just be laying there with nothing running through my mind that does it too. :-)

Welcome cattknap!!!!! I saw that one of your places to move might be Savannah. Well, I can tell you that after vacationing there I want to live there so badly!!!! Hope to go back this year. I think the South is a good place to live b/c most of us have 4 true Seasons and a long growing season. I hope you love being here at DG as much as I do- it's addictive!!!!!!

Y'all come on down to Texas and we'll have us a big ole BBQ, and do the Cotten Eye Joe till the cows come home!!

"eyes"

Smile , and you will be surprised how the "world" will smile with you. I , too, hated this small town when I moved here as a young Mother and wife. I love it now and it is HOME to me. Lou

Hi Lou.... hey all. Welcome Cattknap. I don't live too far from LaGrange, KY. Maybe 1 1/2 hrs. I have to ask, why LaGrange? That's where our state prison is! LOL I can think of other areas around LaGrange that you might like too, but I just thought perhaps you had family or visited a friend there once or something. There are many towns in Kentucky where the train goes through town. Bardstown is a beautiful town in Kentucky, Stephen Foster lived there and it is just a pretty town. Elizabethtown is another nice place and not too far from Louisville. Of course, I live out in Meade County and kind of like it here, but we are still behind times and no train running through the center....well, now I take that back, it runs through Ekron :) But we have the beautiful Ohio River here and the riverboats do stop here from time to time and the calliope sounds awesome echoing off the river bends. ;)

I am originally from Berkshire County, Massachusetts and I can tell you it is gorgeous there, especially in the fall. When the leaves change here, I yearn for home :) I don't miss the snow though...but for some, it's okay. Norman Rockwell was from Berkshire County and a lot of the pictures that he painted were in and around BC and people from our communities were subjects in them.

I also lived in NC and thought the pines tree were wonderful. I loved the people and the feeling in NC. :)

My least favorite places to live would be TX and FL. I've been in TX 3 times and have bad experiences each time and FL was just too commercialized for me.,,,,,and too flat! I love my mountains. But,....I have to say that Tampa Bay was absolutely stunning and I love the bridge.

Having said that, I await the cheers and boos.
Happy Day,
Kathy

Karrie -- Next time your feeling a bit depressed try saying this aloud to yourself " SO YOU THINK - SO YOU ARE." My job was to motivate insurance agents that worked on commission only,
no salary, which breaks down to no sales no money! After a couple of no sale weeks the agent or agents get into a rut and when this happens they feel hopeless and demoralized. They are still the same gifted people but it was their attitude that defeated them. They became their own worst enemy!
When there is no money, life is hell - when there is money,life is beautiful!
By the way Karrie, I too worked on a commission basis only. If my agents didn't produce, I didn't make money. I know what I'm talking about because I made a very good income. Just don't forget - you can be your very own worst enemy "SO YOU THINK - SO YOU ARE! I'll send you my bill later. Keep smiling - show them you are the best!!!

This message was edited Mar 21, 2004 3:16 PM

LOL T Plant - yes, I realize that having a positive attitude is the key. Sometimes we just forget that. You wouldn't send a bill to little ole' me would ya? Thanks for the reminder and the encouragement. Things are going better for me now, and it has helped alot to be able to get outside and start gardening again - great therapy - pulling weeds is like pulling out the ickies in your heart.

Locust Of Control, what YOU put into life, you get in return. There's good and bad in every religion, race, ethnicity, culture, as well as nationality. Stero-types run rampant in every state, self fulfilling prophecys, it's up to the individual to become educated enough to understand that it is ALL learned and not innate, and to de-construct the negative traits(we ALL have a little in us, and unfortunately, some have a lot), so that we can live a more productive life. Phenotype is very important, as well as the affective domain, getting to know one SELF, and to surround youself, with people and an environment that is conducive to one's beliefs and STRENGTHS. The preacher with the comment about the BLACK man, that goes on everyday and everywhere, so it's up to the individual to realize that and to take it with a grain of salt, spit it out, and stay as clear from it as possible. I know it's near impossible, but if you understand it's around us everyday, the humanitarian in all of us can learn how to better ourselves, and to educate others that it does exist, and what we can do to change it. You cannot teach ignorance, and you let those birds of a feather to flock together, and you surround yourself with people that want to make a difference, in their own lives as well as for others. There's hope for everyone, but at the same time you can't help the world, but you sure can start by making a difference in your own life. So Karrie, it's time to stop beating around the bush, before you know it, you'll be looking back with NO ego integrity(Meaning if you could change things in your past you would), so the time has come to change(And change is good and healthy). A new location, a new job, a renewed spirit, no more rainy weather and coffee LOL, but some Southern lovin, and a new start to life, because It's Never Too Late. Good Luck, and if you need to talk about ANYTHING, e-mail me, or keep up the chat on the thread. Communication and honesty(with one self) and others, is the first step to Ego Integrity, and not Living The Life, Never Lived. Your friend, Danny

This message was edited Mar 21, 2004 4:20 PM

What????????????????????

I am glad to see things are perking up for you. when things happen like the preacher incident, i just pray for that person, the devil can get a hold of everyone even a preacher sometimes, prayer can be a big weapon against satan, so i pray and leave it up to someone that can do something about it. take care

JudithI, I thought it was just me-LOL!!! Springsong, I agree with what you said. Only wish it hadn't taken me so many years to come to that answer.

My Bad, first, second, I agree with you all also. You just have to pray for those who are role models, that make mistakes(human error). We all do and have done the same at one time or another, that's why we are mortal. I've been busy with my spring semester at college, so I'll break down my thread a bit real soon. Good Luck, and God Bless to all. Your Friend, Danny

Dear Dan, No offense, OK buddy?? I just felt exactly like Judith, that's all. You can't help it if you are so obviously intelligent beyond us mere mortals----LOL!!! I wish you the best in school. BTW, love your DG name! Never met a Dan who wasn't a good guy!!!

Hi Misty - you asked Why La Grange? My best friend's family lives there and she and her husband own an antique mall on Main Street in downtown La Grange although they live in Long Beach, CA, as do my husband and I. My husband and I have visited La Grange and I am getting ready to go back again with my friend. La Grange is pretty charming but we are also looking at other nearby areas. Thanks for the heads-up on Bardstown and Elizabethtown...I'll try to check those places out on this upcoming trip.

One good thing about retiring to KY is that it is the 3rd cheapest state in the union as far as overall taxation is concerned - which is something to consider when you are retiring.

What just cracks me up when we go to KY is the food - we went to a little town called Shelbyville - ate at a wonderful restaurant - they actually give you a whole pan of hot biscuits to eat while you are reading the menu! Lots of fried foods and creamy dishes - I ate something called a Hot Brown (I think that was what it was called) - bread, ham, cheese sauce - everything hot and melty. Then its back to CA where I have to starve myself for 2 weeks to lose the weight I gained in KY eating fried, gooey, cheesy things (yum).

We went to New England a couple of years ago for our 25th anniversary - wow - what a lovely, fabulous place (we stayed in Boston, Cape Cod, Nantucket, Litchfield Conn., Deer Isle Maine and Woodstock Vermont). We loved every minute of it. Just couldn't take the winters....I covet a little cabin in Maine for summer vacations.

Well I'll be ....look who's here in my favorite site Cattknap.

Hi Cathleen, long time no see or hear from. Remember me, Donna from Huntington Beach? This is where I've been hiding out for a long time. It's good to see that youv'e found this wonderful site, I hope you enjoy it. These are some really friendly people and will open their arms and hearts to you if you let them. If you need any help getting around this place, please feel free to ask. So Welcome and hope you enjoy.

Sorry Karrie, didn't mean to hijack your thread. lol

Donna

That's ok Donna - This thread has taken many turns, and I have enjoyed all the posts - including old friends meeting up again.