I had a terrible dream last nite...

...I dreamt that a dachshund mated with some of our chickens! Now we have a bunch of short 4-legged chickens running around! And instead of crowing at daybreak, they’re barking!

They really look funny as they lay their eggs! (And the eggs look funny, too! Kinda long and skinny!) My problem is:

Now that the chickens have four legs, and if I butchered 35 of them, how many drumsticks would I have?
........

The above is part of Alex's math homework for the next week or so. Yep, 'tis time again for the women-folk to take their annual sojourn to visit the in-laws. Alex is supposed to do five minutes of math per day so I just HAD to make it fun for her. What you see above is just the tip of the iceburg!

She has questions ranging from squirrels attacking her Dad to how many 3 pound burgers can you get from a 906 pound Beefus Slurpupamous! About 2 or 3 questions per day (each day's worth in a separate envelope).

There is no doubt she is gonna have fun w/math!

(Ya'll ever need help w/your math just gimme a holler!) ô¿ô

I dunno nothin' bout no math Shoe...I run from it. However, to help her figure things out, you should donate them all to me, I'll cook 'em up in a hen sauce piquante' for the RU and then she would have "0"..therefore, my answer is "0".

(you really should stay away from spicy foods late at night, it will give you terrible dreams)

I'm a total duncehead when it comes to math. I use Hank for my calculator LOL...But you know what Shoe??? If someone would have given me "fun" math problems when I was Alex's age....maybe I would have picked up the clue phone. I have total math phobia! I want some more of your math problems...please!

Shoe, in a humorous lateral thinking kind of way... I'd guess that after personally testing all 35 of these four-legged henhund's? for future cd accoustical ability none were able to play the drums? Because of that, you didn't see a reason to make them homemade drumsticks - so the answer is none. ;o)

Good job Shoe!!! The world needs alot more Dads like you!!! Making learning fun and interesting is the key to success. Keep up the good work (fun).

Thats Great! Thats the funniest math problem I've ever heard of. Its hard to imagine butchering chickhunds, I love dachshunds, I have three at home. anything resembling dachshunds would be to hard to butcher. I'd fail this question. don't stop sending them.

Shoe - you are a far cry from the glaring eyes of my old and very strict math teacher. No wonder I baulked at the subject. Your way I think I could handle and you wouldn't scare me off either. Alex has to be very happy with her teacher dad and his fun methods of education. btw - keep away from cheese at night too - not good!!

Nice shoe; I mean really nice. I think to this day it's why I'm smart - cuz my folks taught the same way. DD would take a penny and place six pennies around it. Would talk to us about the number 7 and that it was the number of completion beginning from "on the seventh day He rested" to walks outside where he would show us honeybee combs and again the number 7 would pop up. A favorite game was to find a perfect plate. Let's say a license plate would read 123 ABC - there's a perfect plate or 973 IGC - we'd watch on every drive and it made our heads constantly think. Before bed, DM would always take a tray and put 15 items on it - we all got 30 seconds to look and then she would cover it and we wrote down as many as we could remember; helped with memory power and spelling as she would correct misspelled words. Always required to write a book report a week during summer vacation. There were 9 kids and at their 50th, eanders2 (DS) provided a lengthy and hilarious math lesson to about 100 people which included how many PB&J sandwiches were made, how many diapers had been used, approximately how many hugs and kisses had been met out.

Keep up the good work my friend!

ROFLOL..........wonder how you're gonna handle Algebra and Geometry!!!

"eyes"

Shoe, can you tell time with your feet?
Great job ! I tutor math to both the eggheads and those falling behind and keeping their attention is always the most important thing. Math is noisy business. Yes indeed!

This message was edited Thursday, Jul 31st 6:53 PM

what's math?

I know... I know... is the answer 140 drumstick's??????

Do I win... is there a prize?????????

I can't wait to show this one to the girl's at work, they already think I am nut's about DG, and I keep telling them Dave's is more than a Garden Site and this one should REALLY prove my point!!!! LOL

If any new member's read this PLEASE go to this link and read some of the thread's that shoe has started you will just die laughing!!!!!!

http://davesgarden.com/threads.php?user=Horseshoe


sue

This message was edited Thursday, Jul 31st 7:53 PM

Mercy me!...Lisa, Vic, I am not the best with Math myself! Just know the basics! (Good deducing, Lisa! 0!)

Carol...caution. Your mind is beginning to get scary. Reminds me of meself. I better warn Adam about you!

celia, a_leon, louisa...I've always noticed my wife makes things fun and entertaining for Alex, but in a bit different way than me. (I admit, I like the road less...er, uh, PATH less traveled.) And don't worry about dachshunds a_leon...we have one here also! Love 'em! Wouldn't mind a couple more (someday!). Louisa..cheese? No mo' cheese? NO!!!!!....

Dea, sounds like you grew up in a fun household. I bet many of us wish we had also. Glad you will/have passed it down! Keep the fun alive!

Eyes...now THAT will be a challenge. Hope you are thinking of some good ideas for me!

Frogs...I do lots with my feet! I even walk on them! If you need some math examples, just holler...I'll see what I can do!

Carena, I grew up all my life (so far!) wondering about math! I had the same question as you!

Ruby (sue)...you got the answer right! Plus, you WIN the drumsticks! Will send them with a crispy/seasoned batter, no extra charge! By the way, your friends are gonna think you're totally NUTS to be viewing this sorta thread! Hope you don't get in trubble! And now, one thing to say...

...I just clicked your link and discovered some info about MYSELF! So THAT's the damage I've done to this place!! I hope that info doesn't scare members outta here! ô¿ô

(By the way, thanks for all ya'll input and fun. I enjoyed it. Keep smiling!) (See ya next time I post!)

I was thinking about this: It must have been a man who invented math...and I think it must have been the same man who invented panty hose. I want nothing to do with either. They were both made to make my life miserable. And whats that all about..mixing alphabits with numbers??? Sure sign of a sick mind I tell ya.

HAH!!!....Lisa!

"You ain't right!" :>)

Another classic word problem from the Shoemaster! Shoe, you'd love the way our freshman English teacher taught grammar. Instead of having us diagram sentences for structure, he taught something called "functional analysis". That in itself wasn't funny, but the sentences he used to teach it WERE. Things like "Many ugly chickens died." He also would play Monty Python skits off of three LP's he had. Humor really does help things stick in the mind!

you know what I get for that answer you ask for?






BURPPPPPPPPPP Thank you!

Here Pondy...wanna borrow my bibb? :>)

I agree GW...humor sinks in, serious math sinks. (er, did I mean Stinks?)

"Many ugly chickens died"....love it! Sounds like a good name for a story!

Your bib would be a lost cause after I eat all those chickens. You can keep it for now but thanks for the offer.

I hated math in school. Fell behind on a move and never got caught up so I was lost all my school days. I sure wish I could have learned more because sometimes even with a calculator, I am lost. I call it blond moments.

Great view on math problems, 'Shoe!

I hated math with a deep purple passion! But I must admit if I had a teacher like Shoe...it would have been much funner(wait is that a word?) Sounds like a fun way to learn.. I only wish I had the talent when it comes to teaching my own 3 boys!

LOL Pond! Best be glad you can call it a "blonde moment" and ya don't have to call it a senior moment! LOL Later on you could always use "Senior Blonde Moment"!! Now that would be bad huh?! :)

Molly, since I am now a licensed member of AARP is am already having "blond senior moments" but I forgot to put that in my post above because I was having one. HEHEHEHEHE

Shoe, you are a great Dad and I only wish that all children could experience someone like you in their lives. Awesome to be able to teach like that! I sure wish I could have had you for a teacher!!!!

Shoe that is just great. You do so many fun things with Alex she is a very lucky girl. But I would say your pretty darn lucky too she is a great young lady. Ok so what is today's math problem we want more?

Ain't got no question 'bout math shoe, but I would like ta know how ya git this little emoticon ô¿ô in yer posts?
Do ya jus copy and paste it like I jus did??

Oh, wait a minute...I do have a math question...

(Had to go find it, therefore, this edit)

Shoe; I know I've heard the answer to this math question before, but cain't remember where. Maybe you can help!
Here's my question:

The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to...??




This message was edited Saturday, Aug 2nd 1:26 PM

the square root of the remaining side

Scarecrow - Wizard of Oz

sorry to step on it shoe - I LOVE Math !!

Dea...I ain't no math wizard, but sure know who the Wizard of Oz is! That's exactly where I remember that "math" problem! I should memorize that one day, just in case I have to use it to impress someone!

tc...hope you can use that equation somewhere in life! If you ever do, let me know how you used it!

(As for the emoticon, some folks think it's top secret! Others think it's another "equation"! All I know is it seems to automatically shoot out the ends of my fingers when the need arises! People let me continue to use it cus they say it looks just like me!) (Reckon it's my DG trademark now! Or is it the math problems that are?)

Okay Mystic...yesterday's math questions for Alex (who arrived safely in Maine...whewwww! Now all I gotta do is worry about all that water they're surrounded by!)

Okay, here’s the thing…
(1)If a squirrel (still alive) weighs 2 pounds, and there are 16 ounces to a pound, how many ounces does the squirrel weight?

AND(!)(2)…if that same squirrel got shot by a .22 rifle (cuz it ate up all our peaches!), and the bullet weighs one ounce, how much does the DEAD squirrel weigh?

And (3) (most important one!)
If a FAMILY of squirrels attacked your Dad, and there were five squirrels in this particular squirrel family…and your Dad (who weighs approximately 175 pounds) took off running like a chicken with Colonel Sanders after him, and all the squirrels were hanging onto him (with their little tiny claws!), how much total weight did Dad’s boney legs have to carry?

End of Homework.
Buh-bye! ô¿ô

shoe; yer a hoot my friend! I bet we'd take to one another like biscuits and gravy; grits and eggs; peanut butter and jelly...etc!! ;~)

TC guess you will have to come to the Ky round up and find out.

mystic; I'd love to come!! But, alas, I have a feelin I'll be sittin in a classroom on the campus of Slippery Rock University at that time! :-(
(When is it anyway?)

Guess I haven't kept up here. Sorry.

TC...roundup is the 26th of Sept (and 27th and 28th)...weekend days. Reckon you better let me talk to your teacher...I'm sure I can get you outta school on Sat and Sunday! Being from Kentucky, you got any idea where this place is? Ever been to Prizer's Point? Ky is your ol' stompin' grounds, eh?

shoe; cain't say I rightly know where Prizer's Point is!
Is it anywheres near the central part of the state?
Don't worry tho, iffin it's in the Bluegrass state, I can shorely get there from here!!
I've marked those dates in my school calendar and I'll try to see about makin it down to the RU!! Since it's the weekend, I could maybe make it down for one day!! :~)

I can't remember right now where it is near. There is a thread (or two) in the Roundup Forum tho. Check it out for more info.

Will do shoe! I reckon ya coulda provided a link here to one of those threads, I fergive ya tho! :~)

Sheesh! Making a lazy man work at THIS time of day? My goo'ness!http://davesgarden.com/t/382341/

By crackie now go look and see what I done went and posted shoe!! http://davesgarden.com/t/390648/

By the way, thanx fer showin me the link! :~)