Gift - Oops Did I tell You?

Tasha got engaged in November to a great fellow and is planning a September beach wedding.
This is our first, and we (believe it or not) have never been to a wedding other than our own - what does a mother get for a gift for the daughter and son-in-law to be for their big day?
Any ideas appreciated!
Candee

This message was edited Wednesday, Jan 15th 12:47 PM

For our kids (we had 3 get married in the same year :(
we picked the biggest thing off of their register. But depending on yours, they might not put anything big on there, one of ours didn't and we gave them a nice gift of cash to use towards their honeymoon.

We always gave money(lots of it)! They bought TV's, washer/dryer, really appreciated it and needed it, to start their new life together

Thanks, wasn't sure if a "chunk of change" was appropriate, but sounds like it is!

Whoever started that custom of giving a bunch of china and crystal to brides was a pathetic dreamer. I got a bunch of that stuff when I married, and then had to find space to store it in small apartments, small houses, larger houses and finally attics and barns. It wasn't practical at first, because we had no easy way to unpack it even if we could have afforded to entertain. (Students usually eat on the run, as do young career folks.) Then it wasn't practical because we had a houseful of normal kids. We used a lot of cheap dishes, even plastic. Later, some of the fine stuff had been broken and the patterns discontinued, and there were no matching services for china then. Also, my tastes had changed drastically. Finally, I might be able to use it now, but still don't find it easy to unpack it from the hidey holes where it lives. I still use a lot of cheap dishes, because I entertain grandkids. And I have a few special ones for the times when I need to pamper myself, but not those heirlooms I can't enjoy for fear of an accident.

But cash? You bet! We never failed to find a use for the folding stuff. Not gift certificates so much as good old filthy lucre. I do think this should be accompanied by some nice but small item, like personalized note papers for the new couple or an addition to their CD collection. This allows for a discreet envelope to be tucked into the package they open. If the couple decides to open the envelope in private, there is still something to open for the gang.

When our daughter got married, they had already bought a house. It had a hidious front step deal. They were planning a family reception at their how the day after the wedding.
She asked my son & I if we could built a new deck on her front entry before that day came. Of course she wanted to pay for it later. We agreed to her terms.
On the day of the party we got to the new deck without her noticing and tied a big red ribbon on it and nice card. She actually was in tears when she opened the card and read congradulations, enjoy your new deck! Way better than a fancy dish that collects dust!
Bernie

Bernie, can I be in your family?

Great stories and info all. They have bought a house and have a lot of the necessities so think I'll look for that personal something and pack it with cash.

Cash! One size fits all!
I agree with Aimee...I got talked into registering for china I never wanted, now I have an incomplete serving for 8 of Pfalzgraf that I just packed away in boxes for the final time. And I still have a complete set of china that I earned through a grocery store giveaway.
For everyday I use the plates that my grandmother gave me. I remember eating on them for special occasions when I was young. If they break? I'll save the last couple of plates as mementos & get out the stuff I earned myself.
Sue

Oh, Aimee, you are SO right about china and all those trappings. I registered for it, and didn't receive any, thank goodness. But we got so many crystal things - stuff we'd never use, and like you said, had no room for in our tiny apartment.

One of the best gifts we got was the annual Entertainment Book -- that book with all the coupons to local restaurants and services. It allowed us to go out, but save money. We LOVED that gift!

And cash is gooooood. :)

Glad to see I wasn't just a social misfit! And nowadays, you can rent very nice things for special occasions, have everything delivered and set up, taken away when it's over and not lift a single finger except your dial finger. When this wasn't possible, entertaining was a drag, but with someone even hauling away the dirty dishes and linen, almost anyone can do it. (Trouble is, most of my friends are too old to party!)