Equal Dollars

How do you spend at Christmas? We have always spent about the same on our kids, but what about significant others? Our son has been with Amy for about 5 years and I never seem to spend the same as for our daughters! Is that appropriate since they are not married? What do ya'll think?

we have 4 grown children and three of them married. I counted dollars when they were all small, but as they grew, now I try to go for 'like' items. This equals that, and not so much in actual money. But no matter how hard I try, we always buy more for our daughter than our sons or their wives. She's closer to us, she's better to us, and we see her 100 times to 1 of theirs. We do give the extra gifts privately.
I do spend the same on our SIL as I do on our sons (they get the same gifts most times). I don't think it's whether they're married or not that matters, especially after 5 years. I do think if they all open gifts together, it's important to show equality.

Thanks tiG, we do open together and I always get them all lovely gifts that they treasure, but the money doesn't always come out the same. Didn't think it mattered, I have not ever worried about it, just wondering what others do in similar instances.

I base my purchases on "percieved value". I sometimes find great deals somewhere and although I may only spend $5.00 for something, if it is worth more, then that is what I consider. Recently, I found some great deals on jewelry and gift items that a lady was selling from her store. Most items were $0.50 to $1.00, but I bought silver necklaces and bracelets, pewter Christmas ornaments and crystal perfume decanters. Regular prices were shown on the tags, but she was "getting rid of them" because they wouldn't sell in her store. Why, I can't imagine. They were awesome quality. So, I look at the perceived value, not what I actually spent.

Overall, I try to keep it equal. People's feelings can get hurt quite easily.

I would spend more for a brother, or sister than for an daughter in law, or sister in law etc...My kids get the biggest piece of the pie. Then my parents, my brother, his wife, then my nieces and newphew. Teachers etc come in at the bottom. If my child had a SO for any amount of time, they should be given close, but maybe not comletely equal to the other DIL's. However 2-five years this young lady should be one of the family, ring or not. This is my opinon, and not necessarily the right one for sure.

Oh she is definitely a part of the family, and she receives quite heartily, just curious about everyone else.

I take the total amount of money I can muster for the season then divide it as follows 50 percent goes to my children. 10 percent to my DH another 10 to my parents the remaining 30 percent to everyone one else (friends and family). I then try to get the most appreciated gift possible with the allotted dollars. Sometimes that is not much but if I spend some time considering the recipient I can usually get a very special gift for a little bit of $'s

perceived value!! that's what I was meaning. Last year I got several things on ebay and tried to match things up with like value. But you can only come so close. Haighr, I know your heart, I'm sure she's showered with gifts and love. That's what it's all about.

We give to our grandkids heavily and then the sons usually like a couple of shirts and a couple of jeans and then the dil's a nice sweater or blouse. I also have one son and family that lives here and am giving all year long, while the other two gets the short end of the stick. If anything is left we buy for each other. Usually not very much. The joy of seeing my grandkids happy is all the gift I need.