Off topic: birthday threads

I know I'm new and I may walk in and step right on toes, but I have a suggestion.

I'm desperate to learn and read about texas gardening, but there are so many birthday threads I can't find the gardening ones!

Wouldn't it be better to create and ongoing "Birthday Wishes Inside" thread that you could add to, and when it gets too long, create another? Than there would only be one on the board and it can go back to being what it should be - a gardening forum?

Signed,

Sad that the garden forum is a birthday greeting forum instead.

Welcome Larissa
The b'day greetings are a way to give a special happy birthday to Texans. There is a Birthday Forum too. When you get used to the forums your eye will just be able to go around them, it's no biggy. Frostweed is doing a kind gesture to all of us Texans, I would hate to see it stop. IMO it can be both :)

me too. That thoughtfulness warms my heart just as much as the sight of my fave rose blooming. Soon you will get used the the colorful nature of this forum, with b/day wishes. natives, ID requests, etc. Colorful, like any successful and complete garden.

I'm just glad to see that I'm not the only one who is
getting older, LOL.

Happy birthday to ALL !

Frostweed rocks !!! She knows more about more than anybody,
and I just don't know how she does it. Amazing woman.
I've learned a ton of stuff just from reading her posts.

I like seeing the birthday threads.I only "know" a few people "in person" from Dave's garden but after reading for a few months I feel like I know a lot more. It made me smile when it was my birthday and I got a birthday greeting from Frostweed (who is like a native plant guru to me, I read the native plant postings and try to learn all the plants they talk about).. anyway after a while you'll get a feel for the posts(or posters) that appeal to you and be able to skim through several forums on your lunch hour(like me)...nancy

Thank you everyone, you are all so sweet and kind!!
Certainly, the best of intentions go into the Birthday greetings, and I do know one thing, when your turn comes, and your name is up there, and people congratulate you, it sure does feel good.
However I would hate to be a nuisance, and if people would like to have it a different way, I am open to suggestions, what do you all think?
Josephine.

Josephine, I don't know you, but I love you. You are one of the
kindest and most thoughtful people there is.

NO, please don't change a thing.
For what it counts, that's my vote.

PS - I just went and added my birthday to my profile,
and I'm expecting a BIG birthday hello, LOL.

Thank you so much for your kind and flattering words Mahnot, I'll make sure to send a BIG greeting.
By the way we both have our birthday in the same month, what a coincidence!
Is NRH North Richland Hills?
Josephine.

no no no....don't take the b-day greetings away, Josephine...lol...Mine is in April (hint hint) and I can't wait to see my name on the thread... :D
You're a sweetheart for going the extra mile.. :)
Melanie -->--@

I vote keep the birthdays going. I was so elated to come home from a long day at work to several birthday greetings from kind folks who'd never met or talked with me on Dave's yet! It gives way more than it could take away.

Yes, Josephine, it is North Richland Hills.

Don't you dare -- this will be my first birthday as a DG'r!

(Guess I'll just have to make me an extra cake...)

Lol brig........mine's in April and I can't wait either......now if we could only get some cupcakes.... Josephine can't be that busy.....I mean she only lists all the native plants of Texas and separates by color........LOL

lol....mine is april13th...and I'm already waitin' for Josephine's bday banner... :D
Melanie

ROFL Flygirl. Isn't Jo sweet!?

TxT: I'm an April girl to! =)

Well, I don't care what you all say about your April birthdays !

Josephine and I BOTH have December, so there !!!

I have to chime in with an April 10th birthday ladies!

WooHoo....I'm April 18th..........Aries rule!!!!

Poor Larissa, I guess you are getting all of our posts back your way! But majority rules, maybe you can Unwatch. Sheila

Oh gosh fly...you're my long lost twin!!!!!!!!! Hehehe!!!!

Josephine told me to tell all of you that April has been cancelled
due to lack of interest.

ROFL.

Nice to meet you TNN!
ROFL2

I guess I'm out voted.

But just a last thought - and PLEASE take this as constuctive critism and in no way as any ill feelings toward any of you or the friendships you've built here...

As an experienced forum administrator on other sites, you could be potentially losing valuable posters who will leave due to the lack of information, and frustration. You will not know how many because they just silently hit the back button. If you just observe the number of new garden-topic threads in this forum compared to others I see (threads started for birthdays and off topic don't count) a marked difference. I'm really disapointed because I've been a Dave's Garden fan for a few months now, biting at the bit as to whether I would pay the $15. I paid recently just to get access to THIS exact forum. And now it's not what I hoped.

I'm heading over to the Southwest Gardening forum, which I enjoyed and frankly, could access before I paid the money.

Good luck to the bunch of you. I'll peek in now and again in hopes of catching the rare thread...I LOVE GARDENING. lol

PS - a couple of forum posters secretely emailed me that they agree but didn't post it here so as to not hurt anyone's feelings.

I'm going to support Larissa on this one. As far as birthdays go--it doesn't bother me--although wishes aren't always given--I've been a member here since 2001 and I've never gotten a Happy Birthday and how much more obvious can mine be?

But why I avoid this forum these days is very little garden information is being posted...the other forums are much better for information. Texas forum is just sort of "praise fest" for a few select members. This is my opinion--and I know a lot of other Texas members who avoid the forum for the very same reasons. I know, because of the volume of dmails I receive--they are just plain scared to open their mouths if they have differing opinions on any topic.

Oh I'm so sorry to hear the opinions going around! I wish more folks weren't scared to just post a forum when they have gardening questions. This is what I do when I need info which is why all the other threads never bother me.....you ask your question in your own threads and then as answers are posted it automatically comes up on your homepage each day....allowing you to skip over all the extras.

Sorry you never got a birthday wish dmj!!! I wasn't aware 1218 in your user ID was likely your birthday. But I have an excuse...I didn't find Dave's until this year! I'll have to catch you in December with a personal dmail. =)

Had there not been what I consider some exaggeration -( i.e.- "...but there are so many birthday threads I can't find the gardening ones.")...I
would have considered your opinion legitimate...but when I look at the thread history....I see there were 6 BD wishes in the 1st 40 threads....let's see,...that means that you couldn't see 34 other threads because of the 6.??? In fact,...unless I miscounted,...there were 27 BD threads in the past 160 threads (about 17%). This constitutes a majority? Then to finish with a sarcastic remark that it's..."sad that the gardening forum is a birthday greeting forum instead."....was innaccurate and poisoned.
Why not contribute something to the forum along the lines of what you say is lacking? Make a positive influence towards what you'd like to see in this forum....instead of making the assumption that everyone else is going to have the same dislikes/likes as you and abandon this forum because of a few good natured posts that didn't provide you with any gardening stimulation at the time. Too bad Larissa,....your comments aren't supported by facts....but rather your negativity....and your opinion.
I think that after the next few weeks,...when the flurry of Swaps and RU's has subsided in the Texas area,...there will be more discussion
of gardening topics that may even suit...... you. A lot of the discussions for the past few weeks has had to do with the Swaps/RU...but that doesn't change the fact that the majority of threads were, in fact,....gardening topics. Not even close to your claims. Perhaps,....the "facts" justify the response you received.

Actually she does make very positive contributions--just not on this forum. This is what I was saying about people not being very open to opposing opinions on this forum. They get attacked--just like you just did Willis.

I find lots of useful gardening information on this forum and I love the Birthday greetings. I've enjoyed the comeraderie of my fellow Texans and am glad that we are able to talk about gardening and share a little of our lives and ourselves. I also enjoy other forums as well. I've never seen a 'bombardment' of birthday greetings. Each person deserves a special greeting on their special day and it's nice to know that there are folks out there that care enough to brighten that day.

I've also only experienced very welcoming folks in this forum, save a few that don't seem to ever have anything nice to say and I just avoid them. What's great about DG is that there are so many available forums that we can all find the ones we especially like and visit them like a pair of warm comfy slippers or a good morning cup of coffee.

dmj1218 - We're supposed to be mind readers and know that's
your birthday with your name? People have all sorts of numbers
after their names, mostly having nothing to do with their birthdays.

You're getting lots of DMail with complaints about this forum?
Gee, how come you didn't step forward before and bring it up
as a topic of discussion. Like everyone else here, you're free to
start a thread at any time, and we are free to read it or not,
to post comments or not.

As far as I know, Dave has not yet added a feature to allow anyone
to reach out and whop somebody in the head, which is the only
reason I can think of to be afraid on DG. Granted, there are times
I wish there was such a feature. Judging from what I, also a newcomer,
have seen since I joined - on the first day I looked at DG - there are
more lovely people here than I have met in my entire lifetime.
Generous, kind hearted, funny, helpful, thoughtful people in the most
part - and then a few touchy cranks thrown in to remind us that
DG is not heaven.

By the way, there is nothing wrong with praise and judging by what
I see, most of it is justly deserved.


Larissa - It IS a gardening forum, with a few birthday wishes sprinkled
in for flavor. You don't have to click on those as they are clearly labeled
"Happy Birthday." You know, the only time a good offense is a good
defense is in football or in battle. This is not an adversarial forum.
It is a gathering of friendly and likeminded people who enjoy talking
about gardening. Post your questions and someone will answer.
You may not always get the suggestion or answer you were after, but
that's life. Like in normal discourse, it's not what you say, it's how you
say it, and the facts should support themselves. There is no need to
exaggerate.

I will look for you in the threads, hoping to learn something.

No--they are supposed to see the same way they see when everyone else's bday is.

No--I get alot of dmail for plant growing/trading info because I do a lot of it...and while they are at it, like Larissa said--they feel they can't say anything or ask for alternative methods for growing things that ALSO work.

I thinks it's really sad that such a kind, kind gesture of a birthday greeting to fellow DG'ers is met by hostility and folks who are way to busy to look a few lines beyond to a gardening thread that they may or may not be interested in. I think the majority of gardeners love to garden and they love to share their gardening expertise with other like folk. They also tend to be very kind people who give of themselves. But then, I have seen a few that are so very serious about it that they don't have the time to stop and smell their own roses or offer kind words of encouragement to their fellow hobbyists.

I have seen some sticklers too, folks who think there is only one way to do it and that it's their way. Some folks who only garden with organic products, or only use one type of mulch, or one type of fertilizer and like to slam others down that do it differently. Fortunately, we don't run into too many people like that. Most people recognize that there are many ways to cook a pot of pasta. Newbies can learn quickly who to stay away from just by reading what is said to others.

Mahnot, I agree 100%, it's not what you say but how you say it.

I hope everybody feels free to just post whatever they want, as long as it's okay with Dave's rules. Personally, I don't want my birthday to be a part of that custom...just my own preference. That's why my own b-day info isn't given anywhere. It should be up to the individual. But others enjoy it, so keep it going...right? Maybe combining each day's birthdays (if more than one) in one thread would be a compromise? But that's up to you guys, doesn't bother me either way.

Linda - very well said, it's your preference to not post your birthday so that you aren't part of the custom. It's your choice. But there are many folks out there that really do enjoy the surprise and it makes them feel special. And I think it's very nice of you to think of compromises to the argument. Compromise is what the world is made of. And, absolutely, everyone should be able to post whatever they desire as long as it breaks no rules. I daresay that wishing someone a happy birthday is against any rule. It's a social kindness to those that like to receive it.

It's my own personal feeling, though, that if there were one thread listing everyone's birthday, I might not read that every day. And if it's someone's birthday out there that I have traded with or developed a friendship with, I appreciate the heads up so I can join many others in wishing a special day to them. I like to let people that have touched my life in some way know that I'm thinking of them.

I looked back to see what happened last year with birthday greetings. I did not find many. Mary (Maggiemoo) wished Josephine (Frostweed) a happy birthday on Dec. 13, 2005. I was a newcomer at the Kerrville RU in Nov. 2005, and they were both there. Mostly likely they were friends even before that. Then Josephine did the same for a few people in January 2006. So if anyone, like Debbie, was overlooked last year, it was most likely unintentional. The greetings were not an organized project, but rather a spontaneous way of saying welcome and you are special today. Those of you who post the greetings, please correct me if this is not the intent. I appreciated hearing from my DG friends when I had a rather traumatic birthday last February, the big _0. Fifty still felt young; this does not!

The Southwest Gardening forum is a FUN place to visit. I have filled a few afternoons recently with their games -- word games, song lyric completions, word associations. They are friendly folks, just like the ones who hang out here. I have a shelf of great reference books, PlantFiles, and Google for straight gardening information. What I enjoy most about DG is the people.

Perhaps the greetings are for people who regularly pop up
in the Texas forum? There must be thousands of Texans
who are members here but who don't regularly post.
It would take all day to send out all those greetings.

Pat you are right, it was a spontaneous thing, and at the time of Debbies Birthday, it wasn't being done with regularity, so she was not ignored, I dont think I knew her then, and if I did not very well.
Then after doing it for a while, I felt that everyone deserves to be mentioned and congratulated, so I started doing it with regularity at the beggining of this year, and that is the reason why her name was not mentioned, I started doing it regularly after her birthday.
I will do whatever you guys want, and I won't be offended if I have to stop.
I do beleive that this forum has plenty of garden talk, and we don't stop anyone from posting about whatever they are interested in.
I think we have a very friendly forum, I like to think that we care about each other, and I think of you all as my friends.
Josephine.

Mahnot, you are right, the greetings I have been posting are for Texas subcribers,the list would be too long for all the members, and the non subscribers can not see the postings on this forum.
Josephine.

When I hear (or read) someone stating that "they" or "people" are complaining my first thought is always "Who is they"? How many is "they"? I have often found, when I am able to track down the answer, that "they" is "me". Perhaps that comes from the Victorian "we" used instead of "I". As when Queen Victoria would say "We are not amused." Always cracks me up! LOL
I love the friendliness I find here, and the gardening help also. It's all there, and not hard at all to find - friendliness AND gardening.