I love collecting and sharing seeds for SASE . My problem is this : I give specific instructions on what i will need in order to send , yet no more then a handful of people follow the instructions . Most do not send the bubble envelope and i feel like , if my seeds will get crushed , i dont have to send them around the countrysite , i have a trashcan at home. I want labeled seedbaggies , so i know what peope would like to have and that way, all i have to do is pop the seeds in and they are back out of the door . So far , i have filled all requests , even if my requirements were not met , but it takes more of my time and supplies and i dont think thats fair , What would you do , if your instructions were not met , send them anyhow and just dont do SASEs anymore , or return there envelopes with a note saying sorry you didnt follow instructions? What is the correct way of handling situations like that ?
Thanks
Anette
Need some advice on what to do?
I've sent out tons of seeds for SASE and I have to say that there will always be people that don't follow instructions... it's just the way it is. You get envelopes that are too small, no bubble wrap, shorted on postage, no return addy.... or no indication of what seeds are wanted. Some people are very good about intructions... yet you have to wonder if others even read what you wrote on your post.
Now I will always ask for loose postage, the list of seeds they want, and their return address. I have my seeds packaged and ready to go, I buy a box of plain 6x9 envelopes and I recycle bubble wrap and mailers. It cost me a little money that way but it's much easier on me. It is a chore and work to send out seeds... no matter how you go about it. Just e-mailing people is time consuming. I would never just send back a note... but that's just me. I've been sending out seeds for a few years now... and tho it seems like a meaningless, and thankless deed sometimes... you'll be amazed at the people that remember your generosity down the road. The thank yous, surprises, and generosity that will come back to you makes it worth it. Gosh... I just received a wonderful surprise gift in the mail from a lady that ordered from a co-op I did over a year ago. People will remember your good deeds even if it doesn't seem like it at first.
I say if something is getting to be a frustration, eliminate it!!! Life is just to short to be frustrated.
However it is obvious you enjoy sharing your seed when the situation is Correct!!! Therefore I would try to work out a plan to eliminate the problems involved.
I'm new to this seed trading, but I had a wonderful lady generously offer to give me some seeds, no SASE or anything. She did this because I posted a picture of my Brug and stated that it was the only one I had, but I was now hooked.
She used tiny, tiny bubble wrap to make a small pouch for them, it wasn't fancy. ( What she got in return was a friend!! Recently I was sending out Common Vine clippings for postage and she was top of my list to send to without wanting return postage.)
Can the person requesting the seeds send one of these homemade packs with their SASE instead of buying a Padded envelope and then buying a larger than normal envelope in which to mail it to you. I know this would greatly simplify matters for the receiver, especially if they live way out in the country. (If Wal-Mart doesn't sell it we normally don't get it.) But would this help to resolve one of the issues for you or just cause more?
If they don't send a note stating what seeds they want or their DG name there isn't any way you can send them seed. So I would just lay those envelopes over to the side.
If they sent their DG name but not what they wanted, I would still probably lay it to the side. But there is the opportunity for you to politely educate them on the proper Seed SASE Etiquette. Or perhaps make up a Proper Seed SASE Etiquette thread and not only reference this when making your offer but in cases like this just send them an email with the thread referenced.
Maybe post first thing on the thread in Bold Type
"If directions are not followed exactly, you will not be receiving seeds and I will keep the postage because you will have frustrated me."
Then when the thread was finished or the seeds all sent, I would post
"I received 4 (or whatever) SASE from people who did not follow directions. They were not sent seeds."
After a while, people will start to understand!!! I'm sure many do not comprehend how much work is involved!!!
Once you have a plan of action you might want to get it approved by Dave before you move forward.
I hope I have tossed out some ideas which will be of assistance.
Keep doing the things that make you happy and eliminate the things that frustrate!!! But be assured you have made many people happy by offering your seeds!!
Judy
This message was edited Oct 17, 2004 7:52 PM
Try to give people the benefit of the doubt. I would be seriously offended if someone returned my envelope with a note stating "sorry - you did not follow my instructions," for want of a labeled seed baggy. They are provided by the sender, as it should be. There are costs to seed trading that are just part of the deal - it is just for fun, and the joy of sharing. You could opt not to trade with someone again if they did not meet your expectations...
Speaking of wonderful ladies, Hello JRush!!! This lady was so kind to this Newbie!!!
You know - those words just make it all so worth it!
Thank you
Poppysue
Thanks , those were some great tips!
Judycooksey
Great advice and i for one will definetly be thinking about what you said!Thanks
Jrush
You are right IF this was a trade , costs would be expected . But we are not just talking about some seedbaggies , but the bubble envelope, proper postage and a list of which seeds . I dont mind the time of collecting the seeds , cleaning and storing them , but to send them out knowing they will be crushed if not in the proper packaging , kind of wastes my time no?
I just offered som purple orchid tree seeds and asked for a sasbe and some folks kust send me a plain evelope I know the seeds will get crushed so I will use my own bubble wrap and if needed extra postage , but only this time next time I wont . You are offering this out of the goodness of your heart and shouldnt be out of any money. I do provide my own seed baggies on the sasbe I offer and all I ask is for the sasbe and a note telling me what its for.
Try to give people the benefit of the doubt. I would be seriously offended if someone returned my envelope with a note stating "sorry - you did not follow my instructions," for want of a labeled seed baggy. They are provided by the sender, as it should be. There are costs to seed trading that are just part of the deal - it is just for fun, and the joy of sharing. You could opt not to trade with someone again if they did not meet your expectations...
I'm sorry but following directions is part of life. How could a person get offended if they don't follow the directions? Try baking a homemade cake and forget to add the flour..Most likely you wont get a cake. So who's fault would it be for leaving out the flour..Yours? or the Person who wrote the recipe (instructions)? No one is trying to be mean or discourteous when trying to share seeds. But when you get many many request...following the directions can make it a lot easier for the person sharing. Also they will keep sharing seeds and it makes less room for fustration...and more room for wanting to share ;-D Say what you want...But the people who would get offended... Obviously aren't picking, cleaning, dividing, storing, and propagating seeds. To share seeds takes work.
Okay. I've sat back and watched, but I feel I have to weigh in.
Some of the first trading I did was to offer kale seeds which were gifted to me. All I asked for was a SASE. The seeds are tiny and I take my envelopes to the post office (2 miles away) so they can be hand canceled.
I got SASE, I got SASBE, I got SASEw/ bubble wrap. Some had a note, some did not.
Now, I was also doing some trading at the same time, so when envelopes showed up that didn't have a note and I didn't have this particular address listed in my Trade Tracker (where I noted everyone that posted a request) I did a quick search online to see if I could find their city on a forum I had started or posted to. Sure enough, it did. One of those people I had knowledge of, but failed to note it in my Trade Tracker. (Something I do to make it easier on me and to have a record of all the trading I've done.) Another was someone that saw it online and simply sent their envelope. So, I now knew what they wanted.
When I saw your posting offering seeds I was surprised to see that you asked for packets as well as a SASE. I had never seen that before, nor since. When I posted my request I offered to send seeds in return. You accepted and I sent them, along with my SASE. I knew the difference between a trade and an offer, but rather than make a big deal out of it, AND I OFFERED, I simply sent everything and was happy for the opportunity.
And that's what this is all about. Isn't it? The opportunity to share? Share our bounty and share in others? Share kindnesses given and share kidnesses accepted?
And although my DH & I now live on a basically fixed income since my husband was permanently disabled due to somone else's greed I still can afford my own seeds. This is mostly about enjoying gardening with friends. If it isn't that for you, why not rethink your part in it. Can you do something to make it easier on you? Fretting over people sending the wrong stuff or lack of stuff isn't doing it for you. Maybe this type of thing isn't for you.
I remember years ago standing at the grocery store with a cart full of groceries. Someone walked up behind me with only a couple of things. I asked if they would like to go ahead of me to be checked out. They accepted.
When they were done and left they never said, ''Thank you. Simple thing, really and dirt cheap. But they didn't do it. If I fumed over that a minute I fumed over it for an hour. Then I had an epiphany. Who had I done it for? Them? Me? Why had I done it? And the truth was - I had done it because it was a decent thing to do and I was taught to be considerate. It had never been about getting a 'Thank you'. It had been about me being the best person that I could be. Considerate. In touch with my brother. Being kind. That was my pay off.
My question to you, what is your pay off in giving seeds for an SASE?
I hope this helps clear the angst out of your situation. Life is just too short and far too willing to give us a lemon. Why would we want to set ourselves up to get more lemons than we have to?
[Stepping down from my soapbox]
The Bottom line is...We want to share and sometimes a few makes it hard on everybody. Why can't people just follow directions?..It's a bunch of [deleted] to make excuses for those that don't. People have had to follow directions since the beginning of time. That's what got people in trouble in the Bible most of the time..Moses didn't get to see the Promise Land because He did not follow directions (do what he was told to do). Just because someone is sharing doesn't mean they should take up the receivers slack and mistakes too. I'm sure many of us do nice things for people and share in many other ways. I could not begin to tell the things I've done for other people. Which has nothing to do with gardening or seeds. This is between me and God. But geeee wizz here! Come on..How hard is it to follow simple directions? When I gather my seeds it is ALWAYS for OTHER PEOPLE...what do I need the seeds for?? I have the plant! In other words..the people who want to do SASE's should also make up for mistakes, hunt down emails, find extra bubble, etc etc etc? Then when the people who are giving the seeds are condemned for Not Sharing Correctly? Haaaa I have to stop here...this is really pitiful. Something is not right here..All I can do is shake my head...
I'm afraid that MANY people simply don't read and/or follow directions. Making the directions as simple as possible may help. I understand not wanting to go to the expense of the seed baggies for sase's - but you could use plain white envelopes which cost less than $.01 each at Walmart for your seeds (I think a box of 120 envelopes is $0.99). They work fine and I don't like to store my seeds in baggies anyway. Any seeds I get in baggies come immediately OUT of baggies and into paper envelopes. Providing the package for the seeds may reduce some of the frustration, since that is something that folks aren't used to doing.
Another option that I just did recently was someone allowed us to pay for the postage and a padded envelope with paypal - that was GREAT! That saved us postage in sending the mailer to them and kept it pretty simple, we just sent them $$ to cover the costs and we got the seeds with no hassle!
Apart from that, just know that many people don't follow directions. My husband would say they are trying to take advantage of you, trying to get something for less than nothing . . . . I just think people don't pay attention and it's really a shame, because that makes many people shy away from sending seeds for SASE (like ME for example!)
good luck!
Onalee
I can't control any one else's actions. Shoot, I have trouble controling my own.
When I'm doing something that brings grief to my door I have to reevaluate whether I can do something different to make the situation work better for me. If not, I have to decide whether the grief that comes with it is worth it.
It is that simple and sometimes I just have to do without things I'd really like to have and do because the grief/price that comes with it is just more than I want to deal with.
dstartz - You are another wonderful lady who just said a mouthful!!
Ladies, you all are some of the best DG has to offer!!! You have inspired me and I'm in the process of sending out boxes of cuttings for postage. I'm not foolish enough to think I will get half of the $ repaid, but I'm doing it because I know how good it felt to be on the receiving end of the kindness of JRush and dstartz, plus a couple of others. Fixing some of the boxes has been work, but the other boxes have been for people who appeared overjoyed to be getting them and they were fun to prepare.
Please keep up your good work, by giving when/what you can, and by saying "no" when you must. You have the right to say "no" if you feel you are being abused.
(The moment it stops being fun, is the time to take a break and re-think.)
Judy
(Please don't throw dirt clogs at me.)
I wont stop doing sase's , I love sharing my seeds with people, I have been known to send seeds up to 25 packs or sometimes more to people that have lost thier gardens for one reason or another , people on fixed income , to schools sometimes on thier nickle and some times on mine depending on the cause. I have also recived plants , cuttings and seeds from people not wanting nothing in return not even postage there are so many wonderful gardeners out there.
True Elva! But it just Ticks Me Off...when someone tells you "How" to share.
Kim each person SHOULD be ABLE to SET THIER OWN RULES. when sharing thier seeds , cuttings or plants...
Dstartz
I asked for advice on this thread and really didnt expect to be judged, as i dont see i have done anything wrong in asking for labeled seedbaggies , as this makes SASEs easier for the person thats sharing , eliminates the list and guarantees that you are able to read what was send , as it is in your own handwriting .
Let me use you for an example , i received your SASE on saturday , you followed my directions and it took me a total of 3 minutes to fill your request and since my mailman delivers on the right side first and then comes back to the left , your SASe is already back on the way to you !
I am not making any profit , by the instructions i required , as everything you send is being returned right back to you filled !
For the Quote:
"I hope this helps clear the angst out of your situation." ANGST translated is "Fear" what exactly is it that i should fear ?
Judy...you're funny! I had to crack up for a minute
Judy
(Please don't throw dirt clogs at me.)
ha ha ha ha
Dstartz......I just wanted to let you know, your philosophy is wonderful and if 1/2 the people thought this way, the world would be a better place. My thought is quite similar. I feel it is a gift to me, to be able to share with others, "my little babies". And to think they get to go all over the world, makes me feel like a part of me is being spread.....life is about giving, that's why wer'e here. I hope I can grow, to become more like so many giving people on this website. So full of love....no wonder their gardens are so beautiful.
I have to agree, you set your own rules for sharing seeds. I'm inclined to think that if someone cannot follow simple directions to receive the seeds, then what is the point? If they were sending off a boxtop for a rebate they would make sure to follow the directions carefully.
I have offered SASBEs, and like everyone else, gotten things not even resembling what was stated. One lady even sent me a SASE for a return envelope that only had .25 cents postage on it. Not sure which decade she was in. I have even had someone send me an envelope with nothing in it but a note that said to put in the seeds and mark it return to sender!
Yes, the request for the baggies was a bit out of the ordinary, as was another post recently that asked for extra postage. But that doesn't mean there is anything wrong with it. Maybe something of that nature could perhaps be put in BOLD to draw attention to it?
I don't think it is wrong to set your own ground rules for sharing, nor do I think anyone here has the right to tell you that you aren't doing it in the spirit of sharing. If someone doesn't like the way you choose to share, fine, go to someone else. There are lots of us here, many who do SASEs, and somewhere everyone can find a person with similar concepts.
edited to fix wayyyy too much bold!
This message was edited Oct 20, 2004 9:38 AM
This message was edited Oct 20, 2004 9:46 AM
My dog ain't in this fight.
As a new trader, I have to admit I've misread directions in the past. i generally send an e-mail restating the request - oh-so embarrassing when it's pointed out, duh - not what I asked!, but still better safe. What might help us all, when you're making a request that's out of the norm, put it in bullets.
"
I have seeds that need homes - if you wish to have some send:
SASE or....
List of what you want
one seed baggy per item
???
Thank! This will help me get my seeds to their new home faster!"
Just a thought...
"envelope with nothing in it but a note that said to put in the seeds and mark it return to sender! "
Terre_ Oh, oh, oh, oh This is the best one yet.... I do hope you framed that one!!!
I try real hard to be good to people, but let's face it, there are some you just can't be good to. If you gave them the Moon (seeds, plants, whatever), they would complain because you didn't dip it in Chocolate!!!
lol lol return to sender........................................................................................
Judy
And others who act like you've given them the moon when you send them some pips! (I think THESE are more the rule than the exceptions!)
Happy trading everyone - I think we need to focus on the joy of sharing! My experiences have been overwhelmingly good! (That's my story and I'm stickin' to it!)
LOL LOL LOL LOL Terre! ha ha ha ah ah aha haaaaa
Sequee,
How right you are!!!!
Every one here has some great tips.. All I want to add is for folks to please always use bubblewrap, preferably bubble envelopes..No matter how small seeds get crushed.. Having them "Hand Canceled" does nothing once they leave your own P.O. From then on, they go thru the machines if not a certain thickness..This is a very simple rule of seed trading, but so many ignore it..It is so worth the few extra cents..
Larkie
I wasn't making any judgements. I was simply stating how I do things and how I look at things.There are lots of times I'm just too close to things to see all the angles. I was hoping that a different perspective might help.
Angst also means anxiety or apprehension. That is the way I inteneded it.
BTW Thanks for letting me know you received my envelope and all is well with it. It is greatly appreciated.
Just a small suggestion to those who don't want to go through the expense of buying little baggies. Dave has free seed packets that you can print up under the Extra's link. That is what I use in trading, I don't ask someone to provide their own baggy, although other members do and that's ok too. We don't know their financial situation. Also, I want to add that I have had a very positive experience trading with members and non-members alike. Like some of you others have stated, they don't always follow directions and that can be a little aggravating, but I try my best not to let it bother me. I have only had one situation where the person was not satisfied with what I sent and was very rude to me. When you deal with people, you are bound not to please everyone. I just forget about it and go on having fun here.
Cindy
Now don't you know veryone is curious as to WHO the one person was..... lol lol lol The nerve of them!!!!
Judy
I'll never tell. LOL
You're a GOOD person!!! (PS Folks, it wasn't me!! lol lol)
ha ha ha haaaa haaaaa
I am new to seed collecting and trading on DG. In my opinion, if someone wants to trade seeds or share seeds with me, and they give a specific directions on how to trade with them that is fine with me. It is my decision if I want to trade or respond to the trade or seeds give away. If I don't understand or I am not quite sure what the instructions are, all I have to do is ask. Communication is the Key to any trade. Sharing correctly is the responsibility of the person responding to the trade. The person who is sharing the seeds want to do it in a consistant and orderly manner. It is allot easier to give out seeds that way, since there may be 10,20 or even 30 people responding. That person is going out their way to share seeds. If you don't like the way they want to do things, you can always choose not to request seeds from them. You are the one that makes that choice, so don't take it out on them. In my opinion, the people of DG who share their seeds, plants, and knowledge are also sharing their passion for gardening with others. To think that they do it for any other reason or that they have a motive for sharing could be insulting to them. Don't get me wrong, their are others who just want to rip off other traders, but they will be weeded out.
In closing, Thank you to those who have traded and shared their seeds and plants with me. I really do appreciate it.
Rose318/Patti
Patti, you speak "The Truth"!!!
This is a wonderful thread, plus each and every one of these people are truly inspirational. The human race is Bless to have people like these who give from the heart!!!
Judy
AMEN.
You all are so sweet!
Patti, You are AWEsome. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts. It was truly inspiring to me. Now I feel better about collecting seeds.. Thanks again.
Thank you for the wonderful compliments.
Remember life is to short. We are all blessed to have today.
We are not guaranteed to have tomorrow.
Patti
Before I became ill I was a funeral director. It was difficult NOT to become apathetic at times, seeing such tragedy & realizing that my own troubles were so little. Eventually you place things into your own perspective. You are so right about not knowing about whether we will be here tomorrow. Life is so precious - every one of us! (That includes out animal & plant friends too!)