Sorry to say Sally that you will find them popping up even years later. Every once in a while I will get some junk mail addressed to Deb or Jamie, they lived here for about a year when they were getting their land ready (well, septic, ect). That was 6 years ago.
I think writing deceased on the envelope and sending it back is a good idea. I'm sure that it is pretty upsetting getting mail like that in her name.
I did go and look for that junk mail stop list but I didn't do more than read. There were a couple that you paid for, then there were several that were free. The one to stop prescreened CC offers asked for your Name, Address, B/D,and SS# made me a bit leery but I read that you didn't need to provide either the B/D or the SS# they were optional. Then there was one for magazines & catalogs which could interfere with getting seed catalogs unless you specifically requested them. So in the end I decided to just let the junk mail come.
New year, new paperwork UGH!
Thanks for the info.
I look at it this way- the junk mail flow helps subsidize the rest of our mail.
Sally, I hate to say it but you will be getting that mail for a while, writing the word Deceased may not help.They might think you will send $ in Memoriam. We got mail for year for my MIL after her passing, she would send a few bucks to anyone looking for donations.
I also look at junk mail sending is keeping the post office in business. Wait till you get to retirement age, I think we get something from ARP at least once a week, and from Insurance companies trying to get you to change for a better rate and usually less coverage, but they don't tell you that.
Oh well. thanks for letting me know. Mailing lists never die! Mom got junk for Dad after 30 years divorced.
Sally
Earlier this year--wayyy earlier---I sent a donation of $15 to the National Wildlife Federation
as they were also going to send me this neat canvas shoulder bag--and I DO care about animals--
so I sent off my donation.
Well! In NO time at all--I had every charity sending me junk mail----Incessantly!
I was so angry at National Wildlife because I felt that they had sold my address to other charities.
WELL! That is exactly what happens! It is a business on it's own!
All the calendars and the address labels and stickers came pouring in! Endlessly!
I have enough address labels--HONESTLY--to last two more of my lifetimes.
I keep all the 'sends"--feeling guilty doing so--as I do not contribute--but--I did NOT ask
for any of the stuff they are sending me!
I hope they would realize that once they send a few things--and get no donation--they would
stop all the expense of continuing sending out all these pleas for support. Must run in the millions!
I just read on a forward how much the CEO's of these Non-Profit Organizations get paid...
It is a crime--I tell you! Like millions!
Now i am, again, on everyone's S--t list....I have NO idea how to stop this either.
Another example------
I recently decided to, finally, sign up for Face Book--because someone I knew--right here--
wanted me to be their "friend"....I am such a sucker!!!!
Now--every week I get lists of people that "want to be my friend".....Barf!
One of them, an old friend, died this past year....He still wants to be my friend?????
This made me realize that these individuals are NOT the ones posting this--it is an automated
process. I have had invites from people I have not seen in 35 years.....but they want to be my friend!
I have people from Latvia doing the same---THEY want to be my friend!
My daughter in Seattle said she would get me unsigned--but she also said---
"Do you realize that so and so has sent you an invite? Are you sure you want to exit this???
YES!!! I want to get back to just normal e-mails---NOT seeing who wants to be my friend.....
HELP!!!!!
Gita, thanks for confirming one more reason I do not want to get envolved with Facebook or anyother such sites. DG and Cubits are enough for me.
I just can't get the hang of facebook and really don't want to. I only joined because a friend wanted me to see some of her pictures. Then I started getting all kinds of friend invites. I will say that it is a great way to share pic and stay in touch but it is such a trap. You are right Gita you get invites from old friends that you might like to hear from but that just sucks you farther in. I don't have the time to visit another internet group either. Having a hard time keeping up now. LOL
YUP--Holly!
Daves Garden is enough for me to spend all my free time on....
I do not wish to get "hooked" on any other site. One is enough!
Economics
To stay in the black, have more coming in than going out.
Home economics
To stay clutter free have more going out than coming in, or at least equal.
Saving for a rainy day does not work so well with "things"
Some people have enough toilet paper in their garages to last a year and some of those have empty fridges, cupboards and freezers. Priorities? Security? Comfort level?
For me, the effort to decrease the amount of junk mail, e-mail, and undisciplined purchasing before it comes in to my house, is well worth it, and easier than the energy I must expend to (properly) dispose of same.
Wonder how long we can continue to delete to cyberspace before it too is filled to overflowing?
Judy
Funny how all the gardening type ads keep following me around the internet since I joined DG.
Consumers make the world go round but I'd like to be valued for something more than my ability (necessity) to consume.
Use it up, wear it out
Make it do, or do without.
The US, with a debt to income ratio of 42 per cent could not get a loan to buy a house or a car. Debt is not an asset. Funny economics again
Haaa..Haaa... Judy!
Stopped by Bed Bath and Beyond and spent about $50 there---just because so much of X-mas
stuff was now 50% and 75% off...
Bought 3 lg. jars of Yankee Candles for 50% off--plus my 20% off coupon on each.
DID YOU KNOW THESE COUPONS NEVER EXPIRE????? You can use any of them
till the cows come home! So many people throw them out--as they DO have an expiration date on them.
DO NOT DO THIS!!!!! They are good forever!!!! Even the $5 off ones....
My favorite stop there is the "As Is" section.....I am a bargain shopper--as you may know by now.
I also buy things that I do not need or can live without just b/c they are reduced....
Always think that it will be a nice goft to someone---someday........:o(
That is my sickness......And that is why all the nooks and crannies in my house are full of stuff.....
G.
Gita, Thanks for your response to my tongue in cheek posts. I feel less weird now!
Lets start a club. Us weird ones should hang together--for support!
All for one--and one for all.......
OK, I'll join.
I've been wondering about clutter and organization, paper work, routines, storage etc, and upon reflection, I housekeep (for lack of a better term) much the same way as I garden! And I like many of the same things about gardening as I do about homemaking......
Any one else notice this?
Take "piles" for instance. Cute when they first appear, adding some dimension to flat surfaces, alittle color, flourish, filler to shelves and rounding out corners and sharp edges, flowing into a lived in casual , eclectic array, visually rich and diverse.
Yet, like thugs, they sprout up everywhere, reseeding, regrowing from the tinest remnant left in place. Others quickly outgrow their space or flop over well before blooming into the possibilities they reprsented. Others never find a permanent place and are constantly shifted around or damaged in the process. Many take far more fuss and tending than suits us or when the newness wears off are boring.Maybe some can be swapped, or given away.... Maybe some can be divided, or repotted, or cuttings taken and the mother pile discarded (composted).
What gardening lessons can we apply to our overgrown, self multiplying piles and paper work?
Uggh...to be continued Judy(One of the weird)
Judy, your creatively written thoughts on this subject are keeping it interesting.
At least, we are all of a stage in life where we have figured out how to reasonably cope with important paperwork. If not we'd have lost mortgages, had cars repo'ed or other such calamities.
Its the less important papers that reseed all over. I can't bear to completely cancel the newspaper but with it comes coupons that I rarely use these days. Some junk mail coupons too, those envelopesful of paper slips. And the store ads. I never look atthem anymore, any of it.
i may have said this before but for me, I made a decision a few years ago that "who'sin charge here, me or the paper/ junk?" So i gives me the extra bit of gumption I sometimes need to stand up to the paper/junk.
Plus I have people I live with who sometimes are affected by the junk- thats an incentive to maintain that I might not otherwise have.
Never look at newspaper coupons. Blasphemy
Ric is the king of coupon clipping last month he bought 2 bags of shrimp for $6 ea and got $12 off our gas. Really they gave him the shrimp. He mixes coupons with sale days and BOGOs and sometimes saves so much that the cashier has to get a manager to come and sign off on the sale. LOL
Pat on the back there!! Way to go!! (Shrimp is pretty pricey!)
But I don't have the time to organize like that. It does take time to assemble those deals and go get them.
That is part of why he shops and I don't. I don't think I could put it all together quite like he does. Takes him about an hour and half going thru the papers, clipping and organizing. Not to mention the store deals he spends a long time in the store figuring out what is the best buy that week. I'm a grab and go kind of person.
Judy---Your eloquence surpasses anything any of us could have written.
You're a Poet---and don't know it!
Coupons? I save them too--even at work--I have been maintaining a lg. coupon sorter
for all to use as they need. I regularly remove the outdated ones and put in all the new ones
from the Sunday paper...it IS a labor of love.....Everything in it is by categories.....
Bout 3 months ago--my Coupon Saver (an old check sorter by month, folder).disappeared.
OK! Time goes by--and it just never showed up. Sometimes people take it home to have more
time to look through all the coupons--sometimes, if we have some food related event--they clean off
all the tables and the long counter top along the wall and my "Saver" gets stashed--somewhere.
Looked everywhere--GONE! Fussed inside--but after over a month gave up getting all
bent out of shape about some immature, rude associate pulling a prank on us all.
The funny thing was that--I had given up obsessing about what may have happened to it-
but now all kinds of other women that work at the HD started getting upset as well.
I even made a sign that hung in the break room for a month asking whoever had done anything
with it or whoever may know of it'd whereabouts, to please put it back.
Two months later--someone found it in an unused locker. Now--this is proof that immature, silly,
rude people exist--and no one still knows who the guilty party was.
Worst--I took personal offense about this being done. I see it as a personal act against ME.
Gita
Pardon me for interrupting the chat:
I'd like to get some opinions on which corn is best to grow in New Jersey
soil zone 7b. We'd like to try growing some this year but not sure
which do best.
Do you need to grow more than one variety or stick to one so there's
no cross pollination?
Open for all suggestions and opinions - know people here have plenty,
thanks,
Cris
Hi Cris!
I don't think anyone here minds the interruption. but you may not get many responses right here, kind of buried. Why don't you go ahead and do a new thread in the Mid Atlantic Forum and then your title will get more viewers?
I don't grow corn cuz it takes too much space..
Sally,
Thanks for the response. I may just do that. We do have a bit of space
& just thought we'd give corn a try despite the herd of deer.
We didn't get much snow this time around so not as buried as some.
Good luck shoveling out.
Cris
Cris, I saw your post and thought it is time to start our MA veggie garden thread. http://davesgarden.com/community/forums/t/1148349/
Come on over !
Chris
Got a lot of insight from reading this thread. Mostly learned that I am not alone in my cluttered life style. For several months now I have been in a clean and de-clutter mood. Most of my online time is devoted to chatting with others who are concerned about the same things as myself. There is a Clean and Clutter Free forum here on Dave's and that is where I spend most of my time, though I still love everyone from MAG.
I find that I am more apt to actually get something done if I have a place to talk about it. There are several of us on the clutter forum who report in usually daily as to things we have done that day. I think of the wasted money I have spent on books and others types of supplies supposedly to get better control of my surroundings and belongings. Most of the books have never been opened. I am making some very slow progress in getting things in better order here.
So many of you mentioned things that I was involved in last week. At Christmas time I became truly aware of just how disorganized I was. I was looking for a special Christmas card to send someone and couldn't find anything suitable and decided I needed to address the condition of my greeting card collection. I sat down with all the cards one night last week and realized that it was going to take longer than I thought to organize every thing so I could easily access what I wanted. It took about three evenings, but now at least one of my desks is straightened and workable. I still have the desk where my computer sits to tend to but need a break in between.
Thanks for starting this topic Sally. I appreciate everyone sharing their shames as well as their successes in having workable systems. Will be interesting to hear more.
Ruby
Way to go Ruby, getting those cards organized! What a job it must have been. THat reminds me, the dregs of my Xmas card supply are still on my bedroom floor. This year I used up the odds and ends and have not yet bought any new on clearance ones.
I'm still left with four bins of unpacked Xmas decor. We have not taken our tree down yet. Last year I was dumbfounded at the amount of dropped needles. I did get my outside decor in and one box packed to go under the steps.
I also spent a couple hrs yesterday reorganizing in the basement and weeding out some kids toys for a donation truck today. Yay. I freed up a large sturdy bin but could l not think of something that needed it. I also freed some matching size stacking bins that I added to the DH stack, Painting supplies and Old Electronics having been overflowing their bins.
We're straying from paper but I don't care. The same sort of principles apply. Things you leave around because you don't want to FORGET them or they're 'too good' to pass along. Yet you also don't like the time or effort to put some order to them.
One problem--not knowing how much of any one thing you are likely to accumulate, so your collection outgrows an original "place" thus a second "place"...on and on... thats how my plant and garden stuff is 'stored' -- NOT.
I must confess we still have stink bugs and some are in my bedroom. The corner of the bed room became a dumping ground last fall. Coming home from trips all my summer clothes are stacked on a chair, the dive bag is on the floor and there are empty clothing boxes piled up from Christmas. So I'm laying in bed and I see a hated SB climbing on my curtains, I go over and pick it off and notice another on the window. When I move the curtains there are a ton of them in the folds. Ric brings up the vac to suck them all off. I start moving things out of the corner so he can get back there. He almost falls over the piles on the floor and looks at me and says "Holly this is ridiculous". He is right and it is all my mess can't blame anyone else no kids or hubby to blame this one on. Will clean it up when I'm feeling a bit better maybe by March. LOL
Sally--
You have described this "affliction" to a "T"...You understand, intellectually, what is
behind this cluttering syndrome. I totally agree with you.
As Dr. Phil would say--"You can't change what you don't acknowledge!"
We ARE acknowledging it--aren't we? So--how come it is next to impossible to change????
Some of you are already working on it....I have yet to begin....Always something else to do first....
something more "important"....
And--soon all the Seed Swap thing will be occupying my free time.....UGH!
Gita....;o(
Holly--
We cross-posted.....
I feel for you! It must be this feeling of total hopelessness as you see the piles of stuff.
Hey! I have yet to put away in a small, spare closet all my summer clothes.
They are laying on both beds in my guest bedroom as well as on the rocking chair in there.
I still need to look at all the winter clothes I have not taken out in this closet and see what I
want to keep or give away.
Can't put the summer ones in there--if I don't take out the winter ones first.
There are also lots of slacks and jeans in there "waiting" for me to lose about 15 lbs--
which will never happen. Maybe 5 lbs. when garden season comes again....
We are all "sisters" in this matter, aren't we?
Gita
A MEN Sisters!
Acknowledge is first but--hey Gita, you don't have to please anybody but yourself in how your house looks. So why do boring things when anything else will be more fun. only if you will really ENJOY the look of clutter free spare room will it pay off.
So much paperwork we save and never have to look at. Therefore, we never have the experience of "now I need that and can lay my hands right on it" THerfore, we don't want to spend time organizing it.
Hey- DO NOT ever throw out the record of paying off major things. I just had the title Co. ask me about Moms ground rent, paid off FIFTY YEARS ago. I'm pretty sure I saw that receipt in with the deed. Also I read a story about how collection agencies work. Sometimes people pay one collection agency and then the debt gets wrongfully sold to another agency.
I can possibly expound all night on the logic of being disorganized...
I also have a stinkbug fall out of someplace about 1x per day.
Actually didn't seem so bad pushed back into the corner and my room is pretty big but once it was all pulled out to get access to the window it looked a lot worse. Once I'm feeling better I will finish up the cabinet I have been painting and then the bedroom.
Sally--
I KNOW I don't have to please anyone else but myself---but I still need to make peace
with my consciousness. I don't like the way I live! I don't like that IF anyone were to come over---
I would go into a frenzy to try to clean everything up. All that stressing out.....
The bathroom has to get cleaned--
All horizontal surfaces have to be de-cluttered, dusting is a forever lost cause!
By now--I could write the whole Declaration of Independence in the dust of my shelves...
I could make my home a B&B for spiders and webs. I could gather enough Dust Bunnies to insulate
my whole attic.....You get the picture???
I don't want to talk about this any more! Makes me feel VERY inferior......I am NOT Martha Stewart.....
Wondering what her house actually looks like--in the everyday scenario?????
Hope I can do better in the New Year!
Gita
#1 thing start small. Don't look at everything all at once concentrate on one area first, say the desk or the counter or the top of your dresser....after that one accomplishment you'll feel great and want to move on to the next...IT CAN BE DONE!!!!!
Jen---
That is exactly what--in my mind--I want to do. One area at a time.....
So far--I haven't yet found the starting point....
I KNOW other things will be rearing their heads....such as Tax papers,
getting my seeds ready, printing out all the labels to put in my seed baggies, etc....
I go through this every year.....It is so hard when there is no spouse to do
some of the things that have to be done. Everything falls on MY shoulders....
I just seem to want to veg more and more.....pushing 74 will do it....
Gita
Just a couple of thoughts.
Starting points--where to begin...
Some times I seek the ideal place, way , time to start my ughh tasks. I entertain my perfectionistic illusion that if I find that way, time, place THEN I will succeed. My clutter is not like a horribly tangled mass of yarnthat if I can find one end, I can continue working through the knots and tangles to the other end.
Set a timer for 10, 15, or 20 minutes and furiously declutter or bring order to a pile of chaos. Maybe the bathroom as it is usually the least complicted spaces in our house. STOP when the timer goes off. This will leave me wanting to do more (motivation for next time) and I will see the difference several times a day that a short effort can make..
Or , take a container like a plastic milk crate, put on some lively music, and cruise tou house until the crate is full with items to be recycled, or items to go to goodwill
Or, fill one garbage bag with clothing to drop off at a Planet Aid box.
Short sweet simple productive
Recently, I had to totally clear out several rooms in my house so that they could be painted and the the floors refinished. Gee it was wonderful to have all that empty space/blank canvass!
Empty a cupboard, drawer, shelf and leave it that way!
The journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step.
Do the next right thing (and wear a smile and a silly hat while doing it!)
A well-lived life is messy and a work in progress...just like a garden.
Love you all. (Isn't this snow lovely? So crystaline and sparkly.)
Judy
Some very good tips coleup
Good thoughts!
It is a lovely snow. Y'all have to see Jen's pictures of fat star shaped snow.
Put a box in the basement labeled DONATION. Then there is always a destination for occasional things when you think I should give this away, you won't just set it down somewhere and forget.
The other side of no partner--no one ELSE in your space with more stuff, and more expectations. "Somebody" i know has saved a bathroom countertop, and a chandelier (dated out of style of course), from a friend's house, and a large non cable TV...I have half a mind to swipe that chandelier, take some glass out, spray paint it, make a floor and turn it into a bird feeder.
Saw a woman on TV who had 100 prs of shoes and slippers...WHY???
Love that idea for the out of style chandelier. Ric and I kinda prod each other a bit to get things done and having someone to help is nice. But he is a real collector of stuff so there are pro's and con's going both ways.
I have years and years of old check slips. My checks are the type that make a copy when you write them so you have a book of these check copies when you are finished. I don't want to throw them out and since they are all attached at the top they would be a pain to shread. So I moved them down near the wood/coal stove and am burning them a few at a time. Ric will whine if I fill up the stove with too much paper.
You ladies just don't know how thrilled I was to open this thread this morning and hear the confessions of clutter. I was away from Dave's Garden for a while, hanging out mainly at Facebook which for now has been visited quite infrequently. I came back about the time of Becky's swap in June.
Wasn't too very active until a few months ago when I began accessing the Clean and Clutter Free forum here. I now look forward each morning to checking in and seeing what the other active folks are doing there. I have found a source of inspiration and support there and have slowly over the past months been de-cluttering this small place that we call home. It is definitely the major theme going on in my life at the moment. It has begun rubbing off on my family members which is a great thing.
I must have missed the MAG talk of the dreaded stink bug. I know that our county had an epidemic during late summer and it was the head line in all the local papers for some weeks. It even made its way to Facebook when my friends who live in another area of the county brought up the onslought she encountered upon returning home from work one day to a front door filled with hundreds of the boogers.
I haven't shared in the clutter forum that one of the reasons for a very thorough cleaning of my place a while back was due to this culprit. I had my cleaning lady come a few extra days and we took everything off the walls, checked every nook and cranny and ridded the house of the ones that had made it inside in hopes of spending a nice warm and cozy winter here. I had different thoughts.
We too are finding at least one a day too though. Thankfully, some of them are dead bugs. Each time I find one, John comments that there will be more to come. I know, I just could not tolerate knowing that a few times when Frances was cleaning, one particular large mirror I have sitting near the french doors leading out back where the dogs go in and out a dozen times a day, were hoards of the dreaded SB!!!! For those of you who care to know, check behind frames on the walls because at least here in Albemarle County, behind those same frames seems to be a favorite hang out of these dang bugs.
Another tip regarding these invaders, it seems that the live ones I am continuing to find are near the places where I have a grouping of house plants. Check out those places too.
Anyway, thanks for the confessions today. Once again, I don't feel so alone in my shame. hahaha Here is hoping that those of us who are finding our over abundance of goods will find a starting place and begin the eating of the elephant, one bite at a time. Thanks so much to Jen and Coleup for the tips and encouragement. I for one am open to hearing any and all hints and tips on helping to change my lifestyle of one of excess to one of just the right amount. Thanks all.
Ruby
Judy--
Thank you again for your insight and encouragement....
My most, forever, pressing ?Must Do" is to make time somehow to put out one of my Craft Projrcts
on the DR table to hack away on until all the supplies have been used up.
Now--multiply that by about 25.
As I get older--mortality gets closer and closer....I want to finish as much of all these projects as I can-
-as no one else will do them--or know how to do them. Mine are not simple little nothings projects...they are
creative and original.
All the supplies are in plastic boxes--and I know where everything is. I AM organized....
that is why I live amid "organized chaos"...
Here's one of my favorites. These are made from gloves stretched over the edge of a small bowl.
This is called--"Puppies/Kittens in a basket.
See the glove?
Making one of these can take 2-3 hours.....
