Prejudice and bigotry GRRRRRRR!!!

I just got a small taste of being on the receiving end of bigotry and I don't like it at all. DH sells firewood and we are 22 cords behind at the moment. While calling around today looking for a wholesaler, I got ahold of a man who sells firewood, but retail only. That didn't matter ~ he kept me on the phone for half an hour talking to me about the business, relating stories, etc. In short, just getting along really well with firewood as the common bond.

Anyway, I told him where we were located and he started telling me about a "picky SOB" (his words, not mine) who owns a convenience store near here that he used to sell bundles to, an "Iranian guy I just couldn't deal with so I quit selling to him. I wonder who sells wood to him now?" I said we did and he QUICKLY said, "Well y'all have a nice day" and hung up.

WHAT?!?!?!?! As soon as he found out we were doing business with the "Iranian", he hung up?!?!?! Sounds like a BIG case of prejudice to me. Apparently that guy thinks we're traitors or something because we sell wood to them. First of all, that's NOT the right attitude to have. Second of all, those people are from India and are HINDUS!! And as nice as the day is long to us!!! They don't deserve to be thought of that way. NO ONE does unless they have some part in terrorism.

This bothers me a whole lot. I guess I just had to vent. It's either get on here with all you nice people and vent or call him back and vent on him about his being a nasty, blind, idiotic, moronic bigot. That wouldn't be too nice, I know. But it would make me feel better. ;-) Right now I just want to cry for all the people who are being or have ever been condemned just because of the color of their skin.

I'm with you Wingnut. As far as I know, everyone has the same color of blood as I do and have feelings like the rest of us. People can be so cruel at times and some people just don't deserve that.

Wingnut...blow your steam off here...much better then picking the phone up and giving that ignoramus a piece of your mind. Before 9/11 people were judged by the color of their skin,but it's SO much worse now...take a deep breath, count to ten and hear from me as well as I'm sure from others,"Good for you!!"

You know living in the south there are so many people with predjudices. I can't stand it. I feel like God made us all and all our blood is the sae color. I just don't understand people who claim to to christians acting the way they do. Better them than me to have to answer for their actions in the end. I agree with coco and all, vent your anger here. We are all friends here and you won't belittle yourself by telling us. Don't give that jerk the satisfaction of knowing he upset you. That is just what he wanted to do. Janet

Thank you all so much, Coco, Ginger and Janet! Y'all's support makes me feel a LOT better! I talked to DH about it for a while. He told me much the same things y'all did.

It just freaked me out. It was such a strange feeling I got when I realized what he'd done ~ embarrassed (?), then violated and ANGRY! Where did the embarrassment come from?! I don't get that! It was kind of funny (as in funny-weird) ~ after I got off the phone with him, I felt like I had to go take a shower. After washing, I felt better, so I went to play in the garden for a while.

Oh, well. Thank God that I don't have to deal with this very often. It really does make me want to cry for people who do. Thanks again!

Yes, it is disheartening to hear of this, STILL. There still are people like this. But, there are many many people mixing bloodlines. This in itself should help with bigotry. I am white/w a little cherokee indian.....I once dated a mexican guy for a while. I too saw first hand how people could act here. We were in a public place and the owner wanted us out. He was downright rude. I was horrified. If we had of been separate he might not of said anything. I never expected that!
Also at school I had a few problems with a certain people whose skin differed from mine. Again in the military the same thing. Funny thing is I didnt have a problem with them...they had a problem with ME. They were the ones starting it and it was unreal. I have friends of all colors. Frankly I like it that way. Thats what makes America so great!!!

My ex-husband is Mexican (born in Texas), and I'm Anglo. When he and I lived in South Texas, we encountered prejudice from other Mexicans who felt he shouldn't have married a "white girl" or juera, if y'all know Spanish. The funny thing was, when we lived in Chicago, we encountered no prejudice whatsoever from "white people".

Go figure.

Loba...I didnt realize they had such a problem with it, like in your story. I never encountered any problems. (from mexicans) There are many mexicans dating white (anglo) here... I think if they love each other...go for it.

Loba, I can relate. I grew up in a predominantly Hispanic town. Actually, the racial mix was around 50% Hispanic, 30% Italian, and 20% "other" and I was in that 20% category :) I had my fair share of being bullied, harassed and disliked as a kid simply because I was white. To make matters worse, my hair and skin color is naturally dark, and that seemed to anger the bullies even more - as though I was trying to pass myself off as one of them. And dating - whew! Let's just say I'm glad I didn't marry a local boy because it would have been miserable.

When I did marry and moved to the South, I was shocked at the still-flagrant racism. Having been on the receiving end of it, I find it incomprehensible how people can dislike someone simply because of the color of their skin and I cringe when I encounter it first-hand.

Sadly racism seams to be prevalent all over. You think you know a person but then all the sudden this muck starts oozing out of them. It amazes me how many ignorant people there are in this world. I will say that I have had racist thoughts. I was raised by a racist. But there comes a time when you know right from wrong and can use your own brain to say HEY! This thought I just had what was the basis for it? You say to yourself that’s not right, this person is no different than I am. I truly believe to be racist you have to be one of the most ignorant type of people there is.

I am reminded of a song we sang in church when I was a child. Jesus Loves The Little Children, red and yellow, black and white Jesus loves the little children of the world.

After nine years of trying to conceive, our best friends (both white) adopted a black baby in 2000. They didn't go into it lightly. They knew the obstacles and issues they'd face, but wanted to be parents to a baby. Period. Both their parents were against it. But both sets are now securely wrapped around Noah's little pinky - to know this baby is to love him!

You would not *believe* some of the things they've encountered. Complete strangers have come up to them and said, "Oh, is he a crack baby?". She just wants to say, "Well, of course he is - Don't ALL black women do crack?" When people look from Noah to them and back to Noah again, dad will sometimes quip, "He looks just like his father". And when mom was at the check-out at the grocery, the clerk assumed she must be on welfare and asked for her card! She'd have never asked for the card if Noah was white, you know?

One thing they have really seen is people who bend over backwards trying to show they're NOT prejudice, while all the while showing they are. Saying things like, "Oh, I know a lot of black people. There's a lot of them that really are clean."

What's sad is, those people have NO clue of the muck that's oozing from their lips. DH was so right-on in phrasing it like that. Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.

This message was edited Friday, Oct 5th 12:32 PM

It's curious how people behave when there is a perceived 'difference'. I was born 150 miles from here and even after 19 years I still have a noticable accent. I'm as pale as moonlight but the problems start when I begin to speak. People from my area as thought of as stupid and in a recent nationwide study it showed that a midlander (like me) is more likely to be sentanced to prison than almost any other accent.

I've put up with countless jokes (heard 'em all 1000 times over), poor service, interviews with no job at the end, treated badly by bosses, vicious comments, pity, being treated like a thief and/or a fool, one incident I'll relate.

I went for a job as a farm worker, the employer was Lady ... She was gardening when I got there and we chatted for half an hour about the garden and her plants. We went indoors as it was blowing a gale outside and sat down to talk about the job. She hadn't caught my accent outside and the realisation dawned on her as I spoke about previous jobs. She made several nasty comments about my upbringing and then asked what my Father did 'If he bothered to work, and thats if you know who your Father is at all.'

I smiled and replied, 'Not a lot in the past few years, well not since he died anyway, before that he was a soil chemical analysist.' Her face fell. I didn't get the job and nor would I have worked for her but she wrote me a three page letter telling me what a terrible person I was and that I should 'Consider persuing a career more suited to my obvious background, you are not fit to work on places like this.' She was right about that, I'm far too good for people like her.

Its their loss if their hatred and fear of 'difference' takes them away from being a decent human being. They miss out on so much in life in their stilted circles.

GW

I've just been working a predominantly Indian firm and I was dismayed by some of my collegues. While standing in a queue for sandwiches I heard one of my collegues say, 'Oh I'm not racist, most of them are alright.' I turned and said 'You may not be racist but you are prejudiced.' She frowned and said 'How come?' I explained that whenever you encounter the words, we and they, them and us, you lot and I, you know there is prejudice behind it.

Gardenwife, that reminds me of a very odd but funny thing that happened to us one day in the grocery checkout several years ago. I have brown eyes and dark brown hair. My husband has green eyes and blond hair. We had our two sons with us, one of whom has my brown eyes and brown hair and one has his daddy's blond hair and green eyes. We couldn't make our children look more like us if we tried.

But - I'm not making this up - the cashier looked at the boys, then looked at us and asked me if they had the same dad - and she was dead serious. It was such an outrageous, presumptuous and yet hilariously ridiculous question we just burst out laughing. I think our reaction offended her, but oh well.

I think some people never think before they speak, or they were asleep the day the science teacher explained Gregor Mendel's theory of genetics, or both. So if you relay this story to your friends, please reassure them that totally thoughtless insensitive remarks are not reserved for those whose children are adopted :)

I can understand this very well because I am anglo and my husband is Mexican (born in Mexico). I am always running into problems even with my own family. Just the other day my ex-friend told me I need to leave my husband because "those people are no good and have no idea how to be good to their families." I couldn't believe what I was hearing. My mother is the same way, she doesn't want us to have any children because they won't be "white". It just makes me sad to know some people could be so cruel.

Venessa

PS. I forgot to add that my husband just finished building me a greenhouse so how bad could he be.LOL

Baa - That woman was no LADY. That's just unbelievable! Grrrrr.

Baa...I am sorry you had to experience that. How absolutely sickening...the audacity of that woman!!! It makes my stomach crawl. Vanessa...years ago I had a major crush on a Mexican guy. He couldnt speak English. I couldnt speak Spanish. What a shame. We still met each other and played pool for the longest time. One day he was gone. Either he moved, or he was an illegal alien. I was really missing him. Actually I think alot of Latinos are cute..dated a Puerto Rican. His parents were from the states here. But they moved there. He could have passed for a full blood Puerto Rican. (roots) All the girls liked him regardless of their color.....ROTFL. (this is while I was in the navy) That man could dance like you wouldn't believe. I must go to Puerto Rico sometime...haha. I had just had a major breakup with the love of my life before I met this Puerto Rican guy. Otherwise he might of been my husband...:-) By far I have dated within my own race...but thats because I didnt get to meet too many outside of my race on a personal level. My dad is prejudiced. He would of had a fit if I married outside of "white". However he married my mother. She is part Cherokee....her great grandma was full blood Cherokee....LOL....we remind him of that all the time. He didnt seem to mind marrying my mom. She has high cheek bones, dark hair, and brown eyes. Go figure.

To Venessa and those who replied to my post: my ex-husband is a very light Mexican (Spanish blood). Plus he was a big guy, not the body structure that uneducated people usually associate with a "Mexican", if ya know what I mean. I'm half German, half Polish, but my hair and eyes are darker than his! So, the funny thing was, when we lived in Texas and would go into Mexico, Mexicans thought he was white and tourists thought I was Mexican!

I remember one time we went nightclubbing in Reynosa, Mex. with another couple, who were Mexican-American. They both were very light, in fact, the woman had blond hair. My then husband and her husband were in the john and both came out real fast to get us and said we should leave. We asked why, and my husband said that some Mexicans started hassling them, saying that they weren't "real" Mexicans because they were too light.

Peoples' stupidity never fails to amaze me.

GW LOL thanks.

We don't have many Mexicans here so I have no experience to relate. A problem we do have is many of the minority communities now have children who were born here and have to live within two cultures, many older Brits count them as Asian or African but their families country think of the children as British. I can't stand it when I get sent a form for a job which asks me to state my 'cultural background', if someone is good at the job, has the right qualifications and is allowed to work here then (s)he should be picked for the job.

As far as most of my generation are concerned we are all Brits regardless, but among many of the older generations there is still that insidious prejudice which in my view is just as bad as being out right prejudiced.

People questioning about children is not on, what business is it of theirs anyway? Those who ask these questions are either not putting their brain into gear or are unfeeling.