Tropicals & Tender Perennials: I had kind of a sad yesterday soooooooooooooo, 0 by Kell

Kell wrote:
Thank you all for sharing such personal stories with me. I know it is painful. You have such big hearts. We all get touched by great sadness and regret at some point it seems. I guess that is what being human is, being capable of such deep emotions.

I am going to wait awhile and see if I can work thru this on my own. This might sound odd but I am so afraid such mind altering medication will change my brain chemistry permanently or affect it in some way long term. I really like myself and the way I think and feel so I am afraid to mess with it. I enjoy my own company immensely. I know that sounds so weird, but I can amuse myself for days. I would miss me too much if I changed.

I never knew how blessed I was to wake up every morning so happy until I no longer did so. I realize it is all the luck of the draw and I was just born with great brain chemistry. I am so eager to go back to the way I used to be and I do see days like that now which tells me I will feel better at some point.

One of the things I do that I am hoping will help, is to carry on like I am having the best time and maybe one day soon it will be true. I try to do the things I used to do and make myself get involved. I am also trying to do more for other people so I am not so focused on myself. No good ever comes of that. I have been so blessed for the great life I have led, it is time to share more with others.

It is so true gardening is therapeutic. I feel whole when I am doing it and no one is there to be made uncomfortable when I cry so I feel so free to do whatever which includes even talking to my Mom. Some day you will hear I have been taken away by the men in white coats. Please write when they do! LOL!

Thanks again for all your support!!