Trespassing sign sayings

I'm hoping you will put on your thinking caps and tweak your funny bone. The husband and I have discussed a few different phrases we could use on some homemade signs. Here are a few we came up with. Hope to hear some of yours as well.....THE TURKEY VULTURES WOULD LOVE TO HAVE YOU FOR DINNER.......DOG FOOD IS EXPENSIVE, TRESPASSERS WELCOME.......WARNING, WELL AIMED STRAY BULLETS......CONVICT REHABILITATION PROGRAM AHEAD, BIG JOHN AND BUBBA WOULD LOVE YOUR COMPANY......WE DON'T AIM TO KILL, JUST MAIM......TRESPASSERS GRAVEYARD AHEAD, USED CARS CHEAP! our motto WE DIDN'T SEE YOU AND YOU DIDN'T BUY IT FROM ME! cash transactions only......ONLY THE VERY STUPID WOULD DARE PASS THIS POINT..(and a few yards ahead)..LAST CHANCE BEFORE BECOMING A DEAD DUMMY.........

Autumn