Hi, I had sent someone a bunch of water Iris in exchange for some water lettuce, I sent these plants Priority Mail on the April 18th, I had heard fom this person on the 20th and they said they were sending my plants, Since that D-mail on the 20th, I have recieved no plants and have gotten no response to my D-mails that I have sent. I am trying to give this person the benefit of the doubt as people do sometimes run into difficultys, But, It's been 10 days and not even a D-mail. What would you all think?? Should I just chock it up to a loss on my end??
"How long would you wait??"
That IS a long time. I'll admit I sometimes drag my buns but it's not intentional and I do try to write and let the other person know I am still around and intending to make good on the trade. With two houses and six kids, I lose days sometimes. LOL
Is the other person still posting and trading? There were some email problems here at DG last week.
I say to give them more time. If they aren't answering your d-mails, maybe they are on vacation or maybe they had a family emergency. I would probably d-mail about once a week for now, then after about a month, I would say chalk it up to a loss. Good Luck.
I know it how you feel. I did a trade September '05 and have yet to recieve my end of the trade - May '06. I noticed that person posting on various threads so she is still active. I agree however with littleflower, to give that person a little more time. I haven't been as active posting and I've been slow on a couple of trades myself due to sick in-laws and husband having back surgery. Family emergencies do have to take priority. I hope you get it worked out. Good luck.
Hey Kathy, I have not owed you for THAT long. LOL Just kidding. :) I'll be dividing and planting soon. You are not forgotten. My shrubbery is getting leaves! I am sorry to hear about the family medical issues. I hope they clear up soon.
If the person is still actively posting...I would send them an email saying..." no hard feelings intended but have you forgotten me - I dont want to leave negative feedback if you are having problems ." Then wait a bit and see what happens. If there is no problem it is unfair for you to be left hanging and having to feel like the bad guy. :)
I like the way you worded it Charlotteda "no hard feelings intended but have you forgot about me?" I just left that person a dmail (No, it's not you Michele. LOL we've kept in good contact) We'll see what happens. Thanks for the advice.
Thankyou for your opinions everyone, When I send D-mail, I am still nice about it, I just don't get any response. I don't know this person at all personally, but, Reading some of the post's that were made by this individual, Gives me the inpression that they would not intentionally be negligent, Maybe it 'was' an urgent matter, Or worst yet, They might be ill, I guess I'll learn more as time goes on.
Badseed, Six kids and tywo houses??!! I'd lose days too!! LOL!
thelittleflower, The last D-mail ( On the 20th) that I got said that she was getting boxes done (including mine) to be sent out, That was 10 days ago, I never recieved mine and another person that i know she was sending plants to, Didn't recieve there's either.I know she wasn't going on vacation, So, I'm thinking something must have happened somewhere along the line.
Kathyvm, I'm sorry to hear that you have not recieved your trade that you should have gotten in sept 05 ( I want to ask if there is communication still there, But I think I best leave that one alone lol)
I totally agree that family Emergencies should 'Always Be Top Priority" ..Unlike the person you traded with that is still posting, This person 'Is not' posting at all, So I really tend to wonder what happened to her.
Charlotteda, This person is not activly posting and I have sent a couple D-mails just asking if they recieved the plants I sent, I just don't get a reply, And I 'do' feel like the bad guy for wondering if it's a loss or if somethings wrong, I can totally understand if there;s an Emergency, Or a problem that prevents or makes it hard for someone to do the trade, I can even understand if they just can't plain do the trade for certain reason's, I just wish I had some kind of reply.
Thanks Again all! ~Iris
Their computer may have crashed and be in the shop somewhere waiting to be fixed.
I remember a year or so ago, on ebay, I had deals going and trouble with my internet provider's service being down and had to go to my daughter's computer to complete some deals in progress.
Louise
Hi again all, Well, "Insert foot in mouth" for me !! I just got a D-mail from my trader and it was a definate family problem that was preventing the trade and contact!! Right about now I wish I was a snail with a big shell to hide in!! Anyways, It was great to get a D-mail and I 'Do" appreciate the opinons I had gotten, I guess I just should;ve waited longer before I posted! ~Just call me REd
Texaslou, That too, Was something I had thought about along the way, Never know what can happen in day to day life, I was posting while you were replying so I wanted to make sure I answered you and to 'Thankyou" for your thoughts about it., As I'm sure you read by now, I have just gotten a D-mail from my trader and all's fine again, (Except for my embarrasment!!)
the same EXACT thing happened to me. but i left bad feedback one morning and received the plants at noon. i was able to retract the feedback but it still made me feel about an inch tall. funny thing is i have never heard from this guy since. glad you got your plants. barb
Dont feel too bad IRIS.. This is a world where unfortunately not everyone is honest. Your trader will probably understand your concern and I certainly do.
I've had this problem a couple of time over the years and it has never been a true problem (computer, health,family) it has always been a failure to follow through.. so glad things are working out.
Good communication is essential in this virtual world where we only know each other online.
No.. Michelle...LOL.... I'm not talking about you :) :0 :)
;) charlotte
I am the one who forgot to send Kathy's seeds in September, so I offered her a plant. I'm waiting on her to tell me when she wants it.
Yeah Iris, I agree with the others - don't beat yourself up too badly. I think if everyone followed the "do unto others" theme all would be well with the world. I try to remember to always let someone know the day it's mailed out as well as letting folks know when I've received their package. Also when there will be a delay (such as the post office taking TWO weeks to get me the priority mail tubes I ordered from them) I make sure to dmail the person letting them know what's going on. There's always an exception of course...but when you can at least email someone it makes everything less stressful.
Iris,
Who is to say that if you had not started this thread that you would have gotten a response or the plants.
Be proud you stepped out and posted. I had to post such threads twice to get plants that were owed to me. One I would never have thought would treat me badly since they are a much admired subscriber here at DG. They had owed me plants for 6 months and had not responded for 4 months.
After the second one, I decided not to trade again. I hate to be disappointed in my fellow gardener, life is too short!!
Judy
mamajack, I'm glad I didn't leave bad feedback, I just know it wouldn't get retracted before it was read!! LOL! Glad you got your plants! I didn't get mine yet, But, It was great to just get a reply.
Charlotteda, Thanks for the words, It sure makes me feel better that you understand the concern! So sorry to hear that a couple of your trades were from people who didn't folow through, It really is sad when that happens, And as you said, It unfortunately is a world where not everyone is honest, And good communication is 'Very Essentiual'!
Thanks! :)
Calalily, I'm not going there LOL!
Chantell, Thanks! :) I pretty much try to the same as you and e-mail/d-mail people of whats gong on and it really does make a difference and makes life less stressfull if communication stays open.
Judycooksey, Thanks! :) Geeze 6 months?? Thats frustrating!!
I too must say that I've been dissapointed in people who are 'Highly Praised' at DG, I can't say I didn't get my plants, But, I can say that I was Extremly Dissapointed, Of Course, Nothing can be said because of the certain click, I'd get jumped on! So, I just let it go, But I wont forget.
Judy, It so sad that because of a certain few bad apples that you won't trade anymore, I find that there are quite a few people here who ( To me, In my opinon) are 'Excellent Traders!!" And if you ever want to trade, Let me know, I'd be more then happy to send my plants to you first!
I have had mostly wonderful trade experiences here and have met some wonderful and very generous folks. Sometimes things happen beyond ones control and I think anyone will be understanding as long as communication is happening.. let the trading continue... :)
I totally agree Charlotteda! I've had some Excellent trades and met some wonderfull people also! :)
I love trading but I have gotten burned badly a couple of times. I have learned to start small and never send expensive stuff to someone on a first trade!
I always forget to update on my good trades. I should leave current feedback.
Oh Calaliy, I wasn't referring to you. You've been quite generous with your other seeds, to be honest I forgot about the reullia myself. Thanks for remembering though. Most of my trades have been wonderful experiences. I recieved plants and seeds that I could never find in my area. I've also met some great people too. Some which add to my adictions though. LOL It's good to be with like minded people.
Bluegrassmom, I love trading too, And I;m sorry to hear you have gotten burned a couple times.
I try to give a good trade each time I send something and try to keep good traders updated in feedback, Though I just know there are a few that I forgot to leave feedback for ( I really should try to figure it out and catch up on that!) I'd really have to say that about 98% of the trades I have done were Excellent and the people were great!!
This message was edited May 2, 2006 6:32 PM
Charlotteda, you my friend are one of the BEST
Judy
Kathyvm, Well that worked out nicely lol
Thats one thing about trading, Certain plants can be so addictive!
Ahhh so it is you calalily. :) I'll step up and say you are generous beyond a fault and reliable. Compost happens to the best of us. LOL It might be the plants, it might be the brain but compost happens.
It sure does Badseed LOL!!
Michele, I saw that post and I felt soooooooooo guilty! I do really good, then it's like I have brain failure or something. The worst part is, y'all forgive me.Maybe if y'all yelled at me a lot, I'd remember!
I make lists, then lose my lists. Yesterday I did real good, I printed out what everyone is waiting on, printed out the addresses too and now I have lost the paper...........there is no hope.
As soon as I feel like it, I'll send you a really nasty email. I am sure you don't get enough of those. LOL
It looks awful but I have stuff taped all around my desk...
I rarely get nasty emails. Just a few grumpies every now and then.
DH made me clean my desk when he painted my office. Now I can't find anything. It is all his fault that I'm behind!
My plants are now on there way! Can't wait to get them!
Thanks for the nice compliment Judy.
I try to send something that I would love getting.. but you know...sometimes size etc is in the eye of the beholder. I might think I have sent you a nice trade and you might thing "wow...she sure was stingy "... LOL. It will always be a matter of perspective to a point. However, I now try to make an effort to say.. I'll trade you a "blank size" whatever for another "blank size" whatever. I LOVE getting packages in the mail !!!!
Great way of wording things Charoletteda!
I got a box of plants once and one of the plants seemed so small, But, In just about a month, The thing grew HUMONGUS!! No matter how many others I got, They Never grew like that first one did!! I'll never forget that!
Straying a bit of track now, But, I was curious Charoletteda, Are there fire ants in SC??
Charoletteda,
That was a great point to bring up re size - on the same note quantity. Unless you have tons of one type of plant it's good to have an idea of what's expected on both sides...that way there's not disappointment or hard feelings.
Oh boy yes...we do have fire ants. I am blessed without any mounds at my place...as far as. I know !
If I trade with someone and I feel that the plants were really small...I just dont trade with them again. No hard feelings ...no bad feedback...just not worth the time and postage dollars. Remember...even if you are only "trading" you are giving up a plant and at least $5 postage. Dont trade for something you can buy at the local nursery for under $10.
I had one person send me something that was not at all the plant I had wanted. But she tried so hard...I didnt have the heart to say anything. ! I think it is a good idea to double check photos online before you trade a plant trying to insure that at least to your eye it seems to be correctly ID'D.
I have iris and daylilies that I have enough of to trade but they havent bloomed for me yet and I will not trade them as certain named plants until they bloom for me.
Late comment to this thread - my DH went into the hospital unexpectedly a couple of times over the past two years, and I had to cancel plans to go to a roundup one time, didn't have any pending trades either time but if I had those people would have been waiting a while before they heard from me.
OMG. Judy I owe you $$ , As soon as I saw your post I knew it was me!!!!!! I want to publicly apologize to you. It's on the way.
Sue,
No, no, no!!! I had FUN sending that box to you and I asked you not to send postage $, it was a gift!!!
Judy
Charoletteda, Thanks for answering.
And you and I are a lot alike when it comes to plant trading, Except for the part of the $10 cost in the local area, Sometimes I have extra's and I enjoy trading for a plant that a DGr has thats extra even though I could buy it here, Reason being because I have certain spots in the garden that the plants are all from DG friends and it's kind of special.
I like telling certain people that come here, Well this plants from Georgia, or Texas ect. And then I add a little story if the person who sent it is someone I knew.
IRIS, I do not have a bed to itself, but I like having a nice garden that has plants from many states. I have made many new plant buddies here. They understand.
This message was edited May 5, 2006 11:15 PM
bluegrssmom, I understand too, Eveyone does things differently in there own way, I have made a lot of gardening buddys here too, Daves is a"Great Site"!! :)