Please let me issue a disclaimer first: 90% of my trades have been fair or excellent and I guess I should be grateful, as I am. It's that other 10% that is disheartening.
I've recently been contacted by two DG people I've traded with and they've both suggested it would be a good idea to start a thread about disappointing trades. Obviously there are some people who do not believe in the Golden Rule and simply want what you have and will send either soft and infected iris corms, plants the size of a coffee stirrer or pencil when you've specified LARGE - as in the case of daylilies, or a piece of a perennial root that was taken at the wrong time and is truly insufficient to even label as a trade. Then there are trades where you receive other unwanted plants as "gifts" and never or seldom receive what you traded for. There must be many more examples but, thank goodness, I haven't had the displeasure of receiving those.
Dave's response is, "Bad trades? It happens. That's what Feedback is for". It doesn't leave you feeling good or anxious to trade again.
There are also the implied words similar to: I always share with my aunt. Now if your trade was to send one daylily fan are you telling the other person to split it down the middle or saying that your aunt can wait or just not giving a hoot? So if you send four fans and you're then accused of sending too much - what do you do? When generosity gets blamed, instead of praised, eventually other traders lose out.
I'd love to use photos to say "This is what I'm sending" and get a photo in return before sealing the trade deal so you can reply with either, "Great", or "No thanks - that's not LARGE to me". I realize it's not always possible or feasible. Yet, for many plants it would be useful.
Please give me your opinion and/or your stories. Thanks.
Edited for spelling.
This message was edited Sep 17, 2005 10:46 AM
CLOSED: Disappointing trades
Personally, I've had very good experience here on Daves and I do think the feedback system works.
Small, medium and Large can somewhat be in the eye of the beholder. I've tried to start describing the size "in inches" or what I am sending and what I understand that "you" are sending.
Quality is another issue that may be a result of someone being stingy or uninformed. The result of not feeling good about the trade is the same -I know- but it doesnt bother me as bad if I feel that the person just didnt know better.
If I trade with someone who "shares with mama", thats fine with me but I dont feel obligated to send extra "for mama". That is between the receiver and mama...LOL... :)
I think trades are just like the coops. (which I miss desperately...Dave I hope you are reading this !) We are all big folks dealing with people in a "virtual " garden. Not everyone is honest, informed or generous - you need to use the feedback tool and your judgement.
I have been blessed more times than not. And I know this is an awful thing to admit but I will.... if someone is constantly on the trade forum (here and elsewhere) and I view their personal info and 90% of the threads they have ever started is requesting a trade....I dont seek out trades with this person because sending a good trade requires alot of time and work...not to mention plants and money. If you are doing all that much trading...when do you water and weed :)
Overall, I think trades are great. Dont think we will ever have 100% satisfaction though....its that human factor :)
Now Pirl....what do you have that I need :).......just kidding !
I recently had a disappointing trade. I did check the persons feedback before agreeing to trade. (One negative and 1 neutral + many positives) It took 2 weeks after they received their package, before I received mine. I was okay with it taking alittle bit longer, because not everybody is a fast trader, and I realize that. But when the box arrived, I was very disappointed in the size of the plants. I explained what I was sending and what I expected in return. The copy of our e-mails arrived in the box with the small plants, where it plainly said "2 LARGE (yes it was spelled in all caps) fans of ......" There were to be 2 LARGE fans of 4 different daylilies. They all have really great roots, but only 2 of the 8 fans are LARGE, and the rest are small and tiny. (coffee stirrer and pencil sized) I understand that people can have different opinions on what Large, medium and small plants may be, but I don't know anyone who would consider a daylily fan that is only as round as a coffee stirrer or pencil to be LARGE.
I am fairly new to DG, so if people would determine who to trade with only by looking at the feedback, no one would trade with me. (I only have 2 feedbacks)
I have to thank pirl for taking a chance on me. She was my very first trade on DG. (and she is a great trader) I think something that is very important is communication between traders. Explain things in detail.
Just my opinion,
Staci
Staci...I'm so sorry you were disappointed and yes...the feedback system is not a complete failsafe. IF it were me...I would probably have emailed the person and told him/her that I was disappointed in the size of the fans. If you ever trade with me I surely wont send you a puny fan :) You will be blessed more often than not..:)
Hi,
I just run across this thread and have to contribute to this issue.Have traded many times before and been happy to very happy with all of my trades or at least most of them.
However just very recently I received this trade and was quite disappointed because I don't think the peony will do much and will struggle.
It is alive as you can see by the tiny sprouts BUT will it ever bloom for me next year or will I have to wait several seasons ?
Will I have to baby it ? One can see that it had rotted before and is not in good shape.Will it survive alltogether ?
I do have several peonies myself and also have traded some but my roots look alot healthier when I send trades if I may say so myself :-)
Maybe that's all my trader had ? The traders feedback is fine.
But of course that will not keep me from trading ,
Brigitte
PS:If someone is wondering why pictures were taken is that I ALWAYS take pictures of ALL my roses,ALL my DL,ALL my perennials and yes ALL of my trades.I am a cameranut and take 100's of pictures a year for my reference.The pictures were taking after I rinsed them,after I took them out of the box.
here they both are ,both looking sad,
Brigitte
Basically both parties should be specific as to what they are sending (condition, height, width). As I stated here up front http://davesgarden.com/forums/t/545397/
If the plant is not up to MY highest expectations then I describe it before sending it. Also take into consideration not everyone is the best gardener. What may be healthy to them may not be to you. And Vice Versa.
Tomorrow I'll dig up my peony, Eglantyne, and photograph it so we can compare. Mine has been in the ground almost two months and no foliage yet. I'm wondering...........could it be coincidence?
I love trading with the DG'ers. Some of my fav. plant people are on these forums. =) I do, however, loathe it when someone approaches me about a trade and subsequently places "an order" of what they want from me. Often times, I don't necessarily want anything more than one or two of their items, and have a hard time "fulfilling" the order balance!
Some people TRADE in the best of spirits, others don't. I know who I will always happily trade with, and those that I avoid like a plant virus! lol
MKJ
Me, too! I keep a running list and TRY to remember to check Feedback. I mistakenly made an offer to someone for postage and they sent me a one page information sheet on how to shred paper to cushion the plants, how to package, how to keep them wet, etc. Ha! I told them I'd package as I always have. Taking orders that are sent as "suggestions" is not for me.
Pirl,
Peonies only put up new foliage once a year, unlike so many other perennials. When they are dug and moved, the foliage usually withers and dies off. The root you planted should be fine...I would not disturb it to look at it.
Eglantyne, I think the roots look fine, and most probably you will see blooms next season. Be sure not to plant too deep.
Sue
I don't do too many trades anymore. Last year I was supposed to get a plant and received 4 seeds of the plant but I never did get the plant. I sent flowering size bulbs for that trade. I didn't let feedback. Then I was trading for a certain daisy--when the daisy bloomed this year--well, it was not the one I traded for. I give up on trades.
Some companies are just as bad. I have dealt with 2 companies this year. One of them said that it was my soil that was the problem why their plants didn't make it and their replacement plants were the wrong plants. The other company was supposed to send me a refund of which I didn't get. I may leave feedback for them.
chemocurl: Mine looked just as bad as Eglantyne's and I hate wasting our garden space on something so doubtful. When I've dug up peonies, always on Oct. 15th, they had so many pink toes and didn't look, at all, like what has been pictured. Could it be possible that each peony has their own "look"? I've never even seen them looking so ugly and almost deformed looking.
My perspective on this thread is not favorable. This type of thread can only lead to bad feelings between DG menbers. I would suspect the avenue of approach should be to first attempt to resolve the issues with the person you are trading with, and then if this fails to meet your satisfaction, leave feedback on that person via DG site "negative" in this case.
Kasyaker you hit the nail square on the head.
(Somewhat off the subject) I think I spend too much time here. One of my dreams last night contained the peony pictured by Eglantyne! My stepdaughter was giving it to her mother, and after it had been in the ground awhile, she unearthed it (to my chagrine...) and showed me the new sprouts on it! Maybe that's a sign yours will grow!! (just kidding, but I really did dream about it.)
And yeah, I agree with kayaker..... work it out with the trader as best as you can.... I'm not sure anyone on DG "intends" to trade poorly....
Good luck all,
Sanna
Oh, too funny, Sanna! It's weird, isn't it, how things creep into dreams? I dreamt of my garden last night too......I KNOW I spend way too much time out there! =)
Just in the last few weeks I've had dreams of solutions for where to put the ever expanding daylilies and each time it worked out perfectly.
So, kayaker, don't you think that I wish I had no problems with traders? I'm sorry and I apologize if anyone thinks I began this thread to complain about certain people. That was not my intention. On the other hand I truly do NOT believe everyone wants a gold star for their trading crown.
I don't like to leave negative feedback for a person who doesn't have much. When they say they have a lot of one thing I expect a nice healthy piece and when I say LARGE or DOUBLE FAN that's exactly what I expect. So when they write back and say they have no more or "that's all I had" and then you see them offering it what are we supposed to think?
I was wondering if maybe the flip side of this is to try to leave better good feedback as well, because there are definitely a couple of people I've traded with that have sent plants that were smaller than the clumps I've sent them but I've more often than not been just thrilled to get the plants at DG prices. I suppose I've been lucky, but one thing I noticed really fast was that I'm a generous trader.. the people I traded with left really great feedback specifically about the size, packaging, and health of the plant.. which definitely let me know I was doing something right, but also quickly lets other people know I'm not just a good trader, I'm going to give a plant that's a size I would be happy to receive myself.. yep more golden rule stuff here. Too bad it wasn't a golden law, maybe more people would follow it!
I actually did have a trade I was unhappy with, plants just really without any packaging.. But I didn't leave feedback either way, I just didn't want to make an issue.. I probably would have if they had died but they didn't.. not all of them anyway. I still don't check feedback very often.. I guess I haven't seen a negative yet.. but I guess I'll have to.
Would making feedback work on a sliding scale ( 1 - 7, 4 being neutral?) instead of positive-neutral-negative make it easier to see who's probably going to send a bushel and who's probably going to need heavy specification about plant size,age, stats ;).
I have to say-staci-littleflower was my trade
and i got unknown hostas yes alot and unknown daylily i too took a chance.But i did send a couple of big fans well rooted daylilies and others where on small size.Not my fault it was size of daylily.
reason i was late was cause i offered lots for postage -in another forum and was burnt out.and Not that this is a reason-I deal everyday in pain with liver probelms.
And We had all that rain from katrina.I couldnt dig in mud.
I got a email from staci this morning.Wanting me to send more daylilies i didnt have.plus postage.On one hand i sent named for unnamed plants-other hand i offered her to send them home to me-I would refund her shipping.and and would send her plants back and pay for ones she shipped to me.I am a fair trader.
I have gotten stuck alot.But when someone comes here with dirty laundry -It makes it hard to trade.
Staci sent me bunches of unknown hosta and var hosta and unknown daylilies -I did send names daylilies some where big 2 fans of all i sent
sometimes it is the daylilies not big enought to trade -But-what i am trying to say is i sent named for unnamed.And she wrote me thanked for for our trade and wanted another trade and then left this and also asked for more.
But then i emailed telling her to send them back i would cover postage on ones she sent and ones she sends back plus mail hers back.If that isnt fair i dont know what is?????
I will lose 2x in postage sending priorty and noone gains
I dont want to get into bad trades-cause i have had some you wouldnt belive and heard ones you wouldnt want to belive Robin
I think you all should look at my feedback-one was not because i traded with this person was because trade never fell threw other was with ken -i offered to replace.robin
Have to clear something up here
shouldnt have wrote stacy's name
i am sorry for that
she made me upset this morning writing this and it has gotten out of hand
I never said she wanted postage to clafify that
I said i offered it to her
I offered to send both ways -no she is angry i am too
cause i dont lie and she called me a lier
Im hurt im a christian i dont lie
i tried to fix this and now i am crying see what misunderstanding do cause-im not going to be trading so staci
im sorry
I tried to fix our trade -some fans where big no all can be
I dont know how much more i can do it is out of my hands
Robin
anyone reading this post-Im all done trading thanks and god be with you
I am kind of new to all this, and I truly do appreciate anythng I recieve.
But ...I have found that as much as I hate to admit it...I felt like I short changes a few traders...so after dmailing them, or them dmailing me, I took it upon myself to send another box of plants to a few folks. I was amazed at what some traders sent me!!! There are some truly AWESOME folks out in DG land!!!
I was not real sure how much to send, ect. So I just figured a plant of each that we decided to trade for was ok. Let me say this...NONE of the people who recieved plants from me were disappointed, they all said they were very happy, so maybe it was just me, but when someone sends you 20 cuttings of a plant and only asks for 3 items...the trade seemed lop sided in my favor.
So I try my best to make things right. Like I said I have not been doing this very long, and I guess there are no outlines to follow, unless you HAPPEN to run across a thread explaining the rules.
Thanks for listening!!
Sue
I am sorry that this whole thing has come to this. I am not a mean person, I do not like to fight and argue with people. I apoligize for hurting maineroses' (Robin) feelings and that this whole situation has been posted for everyone else to have to read. Obviously maineroses (Robin) and I do not see eye to eye, so I would just like to say I am sorry and let it go at that. I hope that I will still be accepted by other DG members. Have a nice day, Staci (thelittleflower)
Let me speak as a long timer here, with a good reputation. I have failed on my part of sending a trade. The person sent me a SASE for some seeds early this summer, and the plants failed to produce. I notified the person but now cannot even find the SASE to return it, nor remember the name because I didn't put it in my trade tracker.
Probably get a negative in my trade feedback. I feel badly.
got to say something even thought i am done trading
here is what a large daylily would look like and small ones
first picture large daylily fan-one -not 2 fans
a clump of daylilies -to divide these these plant would be small
notice the clumb
on the post
some are bigger one was a single fan other was club look at the lilies in comparing
We are all humans and we are entitled to mistakes. Hey that's how we learn and grow!!
yeah and trading is suppost to be fun! well Im ok now i have had dinenr and things are fine all that matters robin
I got to thank all my friends for all the Pm's and having faith in me! and some that leave me more feedback you know who you are
take care robin
This whole thread has caused to much grief to too many people. I never meant for it to be this way.
I'm closing it now.