Nasty nasty person

Me I mean...I see people or pictures of people gardening in pretty little pink gloves and a beautiful straw hat and every hair in place...Their little shorts and tops are pristine......but I just came in and caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror as I came in to check my email and I just about scared myself...What hair I have that isn't matted down from perspiration is sticking straight up on top and the rest glued to my head in a perfect ring where my hat sits on my head.....I'm a fairskinned person so my face is blood read like I had been outside forever in 100 degree temps..(ie redneck).I have hosed the dirt off of my legs and feet, hands and arms but I still have little particles clining to the rest of me and my attire...I have on an old scroungy tee shirt that once said "Coming together for Oklahoma" and a pair of cut off sweat pants...I think what I really need is an outside shower because truthfully, I have many times taken my clothes off on the porch so I didn't drag that stuff inside....I live in the country so I can get naked on the porch and not worry that someone is going to see me...

So my question to all of you today is...How do you manage to stay decent looking while you garden especially in this Texas heat..What are your secrets for staying cool and getting the work done...

LOL! The only people I have seen who look pristine while they are gardening is in pictures! Real gardeners will get dirty and sweaty. That makes you a real gardener!! The way you describe yourself sounds perfectly decent looking to me! (Maybe because that's how I look, too!) :-)

Oooh, it would be so neat to have an outside shower, or at the very least some kind of fun fountain to frolick in (try to say that three times real fast!) to cool off. Alas, I just use the humble hose to do the job. It really does help - just a sprinkle sometimes, and sometimes a whole deluge!

I work in the sunny areas as much as I can very early (the sun doesn't make it over my neighbor's trees until 9am), then I move into the shady spot to work. Somewhere along the way I forget and start working just wherever and whenever. If it weren't for having to watch out for my back (it's getting better and better) and checking in on DG every once in a while, I would totally forget to come in during the day!

You sound like my kind of gardener!

It sounds as though you look like I do after laboring (with love in my heart) in the garden. I don't stay decent looking and don't worry about it. Maggiemoo is right. If you don't have dirt all over you and your clothes and sweaty hair, you are not a real gardener. I wear a hat constantly while out there. One of my new neighbors didn't know I had hair until she saw me when I was leaving to go to dinner with my DH, brother and his wife last week. She didn't even recognize me. She stated that I "cleaned up" nicely. :o)

I work in the sunny areas in the AM and the shadier areas later in the day, Sometimes, when it is really hot, I wet my clothes when i'm becoming too hot. A few years back, I used one of those misters that attaches to the end of the hose and stands a couple of feet high. It worked great especially on the day it was 113 degrees.I attach a large kerchief under my hat to cover the back of my neck and wet it too. My neck sunburns if I don't. I sometimes wet it too which really keeps me cool.

I have never figured out how Martha Stewart tended to her gardens at her 4 estates and never had dirt under her fingernails. Shoot, most of my fingernails are broken off right now.

tee hee hee...yes just what is a fingernail...At least I know that I am not the only one....

I suspect Martha has real gardeners who work for her!
;->

Why, that's what I thought might be Martha's secret.

Yes I suspect...I just about died laughing when watching a program once where she was "showing off" her aracauna chickens and their house and yard...Now anyone around chickens for long knows that the one thing they make besides eggs is "POOP!...this Martha Stewart chicken was as clean as if it had just been built and their must have been 8 inches of brand new, never pooped upon, woodshavings all over everywhere...the floor, the nests etc...The chicken yard looked like a japanese sand garden...I just about rolled on the floor laughing...yeah Martha has chickens that don't poop.

I just came in for a big glass of ice water and had to check DG. I think I look just like spicy described! I went to a farm with my neighbor to get bunny poo and was sweating so badly I hated to get back in his truck. He is a gardener too so he didn't mind, plus he was loading up on the free poo too(we got a whole pick up truck bed full and we put it in used mulch bags so we didn't have to shovel it twice to unload it)
I have a pool and it is so tempting on hot days to just jump in, but DH said please don't get dirt in the pool, it clogs the filters. So now before I can swim, I have to hose down, lol.

Hi - you all sound just like me - and DH - I wear glasses and have to stop and clean them fairly often cos the sweat drips on to the lenses when I have my head down - the hanky I use gets filthy cos my hands are dirty so I have mud streaks on my glasses too. My hair - well what is not stuck to my head stands on end. I jump in the pool to cool off and stick my head under water - then it drys all over the place so I look a real mess. I clean the pool filters so I feel free to clog em up if I feel like it!!

As I sit here typing with dirt CAKED under my fingernails . . .lol
I just came in for a glass of ice water and a few minutes of air conditioning. I am sitting on a towel so that my sweat doesn't get on anything. When I saw my face in the mirror, I thought I better rest for a few minutes cause it it beet red!

I totally agree with all you sweaty gardeners. I can't really enjoy what I 'm doing if I have to worry about staying clean. I have a whole pile of grubby clothes to pick from for gardening. I have gloves that I guess I should be using but they are never available when I need to dig, and I really don't like wearing them anyway for most things, because I like the feel of that soft, rich dirt between my fingers. I worked hard to get it that way and I want to enjoy it. As far as cleaning up to go in, I usually remember to wash my hands, but always forget to wash my knees off. We don't live far from WalMart, so when we run out of something, I think "OK I'll just jump in the car and run over to there and get whatever." And then in the check out line I'll notice my knees caked with mud. Oh well, atleast I'm leaving.

Gosh silverflutter I know what you mean...yesterday my husband had to go into town to pay for a trailer he is buying and he said, Do I look OK..and I said...well you should change your clothes...He had been mowing on the tractor, he said I don't have time to shower and I don't want to change clothes unless I shower so I want to go like I am...so I said...well just change your t shirt...He said ...nahhhh I'm fine and left...

He just retired about one year ago and up until that time never did any outside work and since them he has learned a lot of new things...things like how to operate a chainsaw, a chipper shredderr etc ..for a white shirt and tie guy he is doing really good and loving every minute but he says he never worked so hard in his life....

The same here, my fingernails are always breaking so I have to keep them short.
I have some really old shoes that I save for gardening, and some old loose fitting clothes,because I don't like to be restricted when I bend over, my hair is in a bun on top of my head, and a headband in the front, I hate hair on my face.
My husband is always after me to wear a hat, but I feel encumbered with one on, so I only wear it when working in full sun.

I've yet to do anything outdoors without looking like a scrounge. I try to get out early in the morning or late in the afternoon. By late spring, I start to let my hair grow so I can put it up in a pony tail. My hat is large enough to accommodate the pony tail. What I really need is one of those hats with a long flap that hangs down the neck. By the time I'm ready to come in, though, I've discarded the hat and my hair has bits of dirt and grass in it.

I have a few pairs of gardening gloves, but don't use them because they just don't right. My fingertips cracked when I was feeding one of my cats with a syringe through an esophageal tube and getting the dirt out of the cracks was very difficult. I started using the disposable latex gloves to protect my fingers and have continued to use them. I can feel what I'm doing and I keep my hands clean.

I've been eyeing this outdoor shower. We don't neighbors either so this is the only thing needed to clean off outside. I have seen some really nice modesty panels built around outdoor showers.

Martha Stewart has others get dirty and she gets the credit.
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B0002J6GQ6/102-3557515-5700142?v=glance

Bettydee,
Don't those disposable gloves make your hands sweat really bad?

The hands do sweat, but that's not a problem unless you take the gloves off and try to put them back on. It sure beats scrubbing your skin off

OH I fit well with this group. I plan my day to do my errands when I am least dirty. I know we should all wear hats. ( good for you htop), but I have found I am comfortable with a visor, sometimes with a sweat band under it. I have a pile of gloves here, there, and yonder, and most of the time the ones I am wearing don't match. Just lucky to find one right hand and one left :). I also aways wear a gardening apron. Just the bottom pocket kind. Big roomy pockets so I can carry pruners, cut up strips of panty hose ( I stuff all the strips into a knee high to keep them easy to get to) A spice bottle filled with that expanding polymer water holding crystals that I put into every hole a put a new plant into, small scissors, hose washers, and a couple of paper towels to wipe off my face, a roll of hose mending tape, and my walkman to listen to gardening programs on the weekend. The Queen is well equipped, even if she does look tacky! SEEYA, Margie

I need to see a photo of the Queen in all her regalia!
Veronica

Please note...I live in the inner city....two block from a 7-11...where all the homeless hangout. I have to go through my house and into the street to get to the trash dumpster.... I had on clogs and an old pair of baggy jeans and an old black bleached out T shirt. My hair was in topknot secured by a big rubber band. I looked like hell but my thinking was to clean up after myself sometime ... and not wait for the yard man. As I were coming from the dumpster two homeless men approached me with a ten dollar bill in their hand .. complaining they were hot and tired and had been walking around all day ... looking for a 'rock' and wanted to know if I could tell them where to find one. I was so upset, I ran to the house and left the rest of the trash in the court yard! Sharing this expierence with my girlfriends ...they could not stop laughing....as I explained to them ... I knew I looked terrible .... but ...I had no idea I looked homeless and on drugs!
Sylvia :)

This message was edited Jul 9, 2005 9:39 AM

LOL...I think you win the nastiest person award....that's a good story...started my day with a laugh...

It is a beautiful (overcast) morning in the Texas Hill Country so we might just have breakfast on the deck this am or at least our coffee..

sylvia, I am still laughing. I know it wasn't funny then, but I bet you laugh about it now. I'm with HotnSpicy ... you win the nastiest person award.

Silverfluter, I used to clean up and change clothes after gardening before I made a store run, but lately I have gone just as is. I too ended up in a store with dirt on my knees and lower legs. One afternoon when I was still working, I was able to leave work early and was still dressed for work. I went to the place where I buy my dirt and ordered my dirt after wandering around looking at gardening stuff inside. The lady started laughing and I didn't know why. She said, "Gee, Hazel, if I knew that was you wandering around, I would have chatted awhile. I didn't recognize you all dressed up."

Wearing hats ... try to do so if you can. I have had so many skin cancers that had to be removed (some involving having to have skin grafts and others rather extensive surgery) that I try to wear a hat all of the time. A very small white skin cancer that looked like a very tiny white head necesitated almost the whole side of my nose being removed. They did a great job on the skin graft for this surgery. I tried to get them to give me a nose job while they were at it so my insurance would pay for it, but the declined. The last time I went to the dermotolgist I had to go back for 2 more visits and had a total of 23 skin cancers removed with many on my face. But, these were small and most were burned off after biopsies were taken. I have been told to stop the yard work, but that is like telling me to stop breathing.

HotnSicy, I was outside with my cup of coffee as the sun came up. It is nice and cool. I love to drink my coffee and listen to the birds sing in the mornings as they awaken.

Okay Sylvia, I agree, you win!! lol, Now we have to come up with some kind of an award. It would be a shame to win an honor such as this without an award!

Veronica, I too would like a picture of the Queen in her regalia. How about it Margie?

Hazel, that is certainly sobering (much needed!) information about skin cancers. My Austin sister had to have some skin cancers removed from her arms late last year. Now she always wears sunscreen, a hat, and a long-sleeved cotton shirt when she goes out. I couldn't wear the long sleeves and still breathe outside when it's so hot (she isn't a gardener), but I'm doing much better at the sunscreen and I wear a visor.

I have a little military fatigue or maybe hunting type hat ...I don't know what to call it but the description inside says Hat, sun, woodland...My Dad was in a nursing home for several weeks before he passed away and a cousin came to visit him and my Daddy told my cousin he liked his hat so my cousin gave it to him...The last time I saw him he was wearing this hat and when he passed, I asked my brother to save his hat for me...so I wear my Daddy's hat wen I garden...It seems very fitting since my love of dirt came from my Mom and Dad...

Ohhh Hot&Spicey...how endearing...I loved that little story. My Dad was a country boy and my most endearing gardening story about him was when I told him I had peaches growing in a pot. He couldnt believe it and flew from Miami to Dallas just to see. lol

nice tree....looks like it's loaded with peaches.....My parents had a love of gardening that lasted as long as they lived...The last few years of their lives they were still raising veggies in their own garden and flowders all around the property.....Believe it or not my Dad was frail enough that he couldn't even handle the tiller by himself and my Mother would hold on to his belt and walk behind him to keep him steady on his feet...My Daddy had me helping in the garden one time ...He was making the row for beans and I was planting behind him.....His one admonishment as he handed me a coffee can full of bean seed was...Don't spill the beans...and of course I did...but my real first gardening experience came with my Mother..she gave me a package of poppy seed and helped me make a bed to plant them in and I have never ever seen red poppies that were as pretty as mine...and I have rarely had a year go buy since then that I didn't plant something until just a few years ago and I took a couple of years off because I was doing the breast cancer thing and just didn't have the energy but I'm back to it now and loving every minute of it...

My Daddy's hat is in the picture...now I want you all to know that the young lady wearing the had is not me...she just happend to be standing on my desk so I used her as a model...I maynot have mentioned that I play with dolls as well as gardening...

Ruthie, I was going to say, you pretty good in that picture! :-)

Ruthie...you just got to take a pic in that hat! I want to see! ..maybe thats what I need is some combat fatigue ... just to wear to the dumpster. LOL! hey maybe we should all submit a picture of ourselves when we are working in the garden! wouldnt that be hilarious?
Sylvia

hmmm I like that hat much better than had to wear in the army!! Great story and glad you got to keep the hat! I'm sure we all look bad while out in the garden working, but it is much more fun to be there working and getting dirty than doing most other things! ~ Suzi :)

I usually just lurk...but, ya'll are so funny today. Maybe the heat has gotten to all of us. I just came in for a break too. yesterday I went to lunch with the family and my DH started laughing and said you still have dirt on your feet! Oh well........then today I am out in a sports bra and shorts in the back and thinking of jumping into the pool (because DH is at work) so he won't know I was so dirty...then my son comes out and says some of his might come swim...if mom looked a little more opporpriate..LOL I told him to run tell me and I would stick my t-shirt back on...back to the yard...we really must be crazy!!!

Hi Cindy...hey the sports bra sounds like a good idea...where I live I could go naked and no one would probably see me...note keyword..probably...you just never know and truthfully, I'd get arrested for causing someone to die laughing from seeing me naked...Glad you decided to join the fun...lurking is OK but playing is more fun...

Sedrick, you just put a wonderful picture in my head that will stay for a long time. That's saying alot because there aren't many things that stay in my head for a long time. LOL That's priceless.

Two summers we were totally gutted our livingroom and diningroom. Took out all the wallboard, sheetrock and insulation, replaced the ceiling joists, raised the ceiling, hung sheetrock, put up paneling. We did all this in July of all things. We would work on that morning and afternoon, and then in the evening we would go out in the backyard and work on laying a flagstone patio until dark. One day after a long hard sweaty day, my DH took off his shorts and stepped out of them. They were so stiff with dirt, sweat and cement that they stood there all by themselves until the next day.LOL I took a picture with my 35 mm camera, but if I can find it I'll post it.

just in case you dont recognize one of the homeless. LOL

This message was edited Jun 26, 2005 4:17 PM

...relaxing after a hard day in the garden...lol

This message was edited Jun 26, 2005 4:19 PM

Ah! Y'all are cracking me up!!! How I can relate to all these stories! I usually wear a swim suit top (a tankini thingy!) and some old shorts, old ankle socks and my rubber shoes. I'm with Cindy & HotnSpicy...I could go around naked too...but it never fails that Andy the mailman or the UPS guy shows up while I'm out and about looking just plain gross! I would prolly have to call an ambulance if they saw me like that!

I always hose off several times a day (or maybe several times an hour??!!) and then swim a few laps during the hottest part of the day...hey it cools me off AND it's good exercise, right?

Yours in sweat, grime & dirty nails,
Cynthia

ha ha you are so right about that...I was in the process of building a new bed and helping my husband clear a section of a wooded area in front of our house yesterday ...looking good as usual...LOL and the UPS guy came and we also had an inspector from the Texas Railroad Commision ...had something to do with the gas in our house...anyway I looked pretty awful so I just laughed and said...thank you for coming on a day when I looked soooo good...

DH has such a sweet side though. My hair is naturally wavy & I always wear a ponytail or a bun while working outside. Of course with the sweat & YUCK, the little frizzies stick out all over my head. He comes home and tells me he just loves my hair when it "all messed up like that!" Jeez.....

Ahh how sweet mydaisy, and I agree with all of you, if we all looked like Martha Stewart in the garden, we would not be real gardeners! I look just like all of you, sweaty, and I go out at 7am, and by 10am I am soaked, hat is soaked, my t-shirts or longsleeved shirts are soaked and my pants dragging on the ground. I am quite a sight, but who cares, it is my thing, and I love it!!! I have lupus, so I have to be careful in the sun, so I wear long pants, hats, and long sleeves. Awful hot too, but oh well the hose works wonders!!!! Hey, I think we should post a pic of ourselves, but that is tricky to do, I am not asking anyone to take my picture!!! :)
This is great, at least I know I am not the only one that looks so bad after working in the garden.!!!! Hope you don't mind that I joined in;
Ruby

Daisy ...I have known disheveled hair to turn many a men on...maybe...lol
Sylvia

mydaisy, I don't mean to imply that your husband doesn't have a sweet side to him, but a couple of years ago when I was concentrating on the front yard, I was always out on the corner, hot & sweaty, dirty, wiping my my sweaty face on the sleeve of my dirty t-shirt, looking like the total wreck we have all been describing. Almost every man who drove by commented what a good job I was doing, how hard I was working, etc. One of them finally let it slip that they enjoyed seeing a woman really working for a change!! Yeah, like their wives are sitting around eating chocolate bon-bons all day, and the cooking, cleaning and child-rearing gets done by itself, I'm sure!
;->