Message to the cat

My cat, Lucy, is about 3 years old and I have a few messages for her.


When I yell at you to get off the table. It doesn't mean that you run around on top of the table while I chase you around it.

nor does it mean to go right to the edge, stop and look back at me to see if I REALLY mean it.

nor does it mean to freeze because you know I can't see you if you don't move. My prey instinct is not based on movement. I CAN STILL SEE YOU ON THE TABLE.

nor does it mean you jump into a bowl, basket etc that is on the table. You may not be in direct contact with the table but you are still on it!

nor does it mean to lay down and streatch so you can show me what a cute little stinker you are.

nor does it mean trying to swat me
It means get off and stay off!

When I am filing papers please do not sit in the filing basket and try and bite me when I try and retrieve papers to file
you are NOT helping by pushing the papers to the floor and roll around on them.
you are NOT helping by climbing into the filing cabnet and daring me to get you out
you are not helping by chewing on the corners of the papers I am trying to file,
and you are not helping by attacking the imaginary bugs under the papers.
Please don't help me.

other messages:
The dog does not think it is funny when you swat it's tail when it is eating.
The other cats do not think you are playing when you sit on top of the cat box and bop their heads while they are trying to urninate.
Your head does not belong in my glass of water even though it fits in it.
When I get a package in the mail. I do not think it's fun that you jump into it and let those styrofoam peanuts fly all over the place.

Mobi