A funny you may have seen before.....

EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DIARY

8:00 a.m. Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9:30 a.m. Oh, boy! A car ride! My favorite!
9:40 a.m. Oh, boy! A walk! My favorite!
10:30 a.m. Oh, boy! Getting rubbed and petted! My favorite!
11:30 a.m. Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
Noon- Oh, boy! The kids! My favorite!
1:00 p.m. Oh, boy! The yard! My favorite!
4:00 p.m. Oh, boy! To the park! My favorite!
5:00 p.m. Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5:30 p.m. Oh, boy! Pretty Mums! My favorite!
6:00 p.m. Oh, boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
6:30 a.m. Oh, boy! Watching TV with my master! My favorite!
10:30 p.m. Oh, boy! Sleeping in master's bed! My favorite!

EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DIARY

Day 183 of My Captivity: My captors continue to taunt me with
bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat,
while
I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is
the hope of escape, and the mild scolding I get from ruining the
occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another
houseplant. Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving
around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded;
must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust
and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself
to vomit on their favorite chair, must try this on their bed.
Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an
attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to strike
fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about
what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan...
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed
in solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear
the noise and smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my
confinement was due to my power of "allergies." Must learn what this
is and how to use it to my advantage. I am convinced my fellow captives
are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and
seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird,
on the other hand, is obviously an informant, and speaks with them
regularly. I am convinced now that he reports my every move. Due to
his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I
can
wait
- it is only a matter of time...