Gynecologists Office: Dr. Jones, At your cervix.
At a Military hospital-door to Endoscopy: To expidite your visit, please back in.
Plumbers truck: We repair what your husband fixed.
On the trucks of a local plumbers truck: Don't sleep with a drip! Call your plumber.
Pizza shop slogan: 7 days without pizza, makes one weak.
At a tire shop window: Invite us to your next blowout!
Door of plastic surgeons office, Hello, Can we pick your nose?
At a laundry shop: How about we refund your money?
Send you a new one at no charge?
Close the store?
Or have the manager shot?
At a tow company: We don't charge an arm and a leg, we just want your tows.
On an electric truck: Let us remove your shorts.
In a non smoking area: If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action!
Maternity room door: Push, push, push.
At an Optomitrists office: If you don't see what you want, you are in the right place!
On a taxidermist window: We know our stuff.
In a podiatrist office: Time wounds all heels.
On a homeowners fence: Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive.
At a car dealer: the best way to get on your feet is to miss a car payment.
Outside a muffler shop: No appointment needed. We can hear you coming!
On a veterinarians door: Back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!
At the electric company: We would be delighted if you would send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be.
Sign in a restaurant: Don't stand at the window looking in. Come in and get fed up with us.
Funeral home: Drive carefully, We can wait.
At a propane supply station: Tank heaven for little grills.
At a Chicago radiator shop: Best place to take a leak!
Signs of the Times
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