General Discussion & Chat: Coffee and...Part 32...! :-D, 1 by Maria

Maria wrote:
I was married to a gem, Kooger, He never carried more than a few $ dollars in his billfold, he was frugal New Englander with himself but most generous with me giving and giving. But I did want a green house also but never got one, he said you have enough to do as it is LOL It had nothing to do with money, we were fairly well off, he was the president of his own company and a Teacher at School of Design in Prov.RI, and quite an athlete in many sports.
When he was so very ill I still feel a huge guilt for having been very impatient with him. he would not open his mouth for the food I fed him, he squished his sandwhich into a messy ball and could not find his mouth, he would fall asleep with his head in the plate, I would yell 'wake up, please' he would get out of bed while I was sleeping and promptly hit the floor and could not get up I finally connected him with a ribbon and tied it to my arm so I would wake up. And there were so many other things too sad to tell.
Had I been on this thread I would have complained a lot it was so awful. After he died I wanted to do what my father did when Mama died, he commited suicide a month later I was very close doing it but some one helped me a lot not to do that.
I feel guilty for having to send him to the hospital when his Dr. said Iwill die before him if I keep this up, so I consented, but after he was there he asked me to take him home , but I said I will but first you have to get better, well he died two weeks later, I could have torn my heart out of myself, I felt so guilty for sending him there.
Maria
This was Richard before he became ill